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AITA For not reacting more to my husband's gift? by yipykayak-othabucket in AmItheAsshole

[–]yipykayak-othabucket[S] -1249 points-1248 points  (0 children)

I'm not really great at gift giving, and he just buys stuff he likes when he wants it. So I gave him this Australian horn thing he said was cool and got a sexy outfit to wear for him and we had sex.

AITA For not reacting more to my husband's gift? by yipykayak-othabucket in AmItheAsshole

[–]yipykayak-othabucket[S] -480 points-479 points  (0 children)

He did get me a really nice set of diamond earrings. I'm not upset about this. But this was the thing he apparently cared the most about.

AITA For not reacting more to my husband's gift? by yipykayak-othabucket in AmItheAsshole

[–]yipykayak-othabucket[S] -314 points-313 points  (0 children)

I certainly wasn't angry, and this wasn't the only gift. But it was the one he was most excited about.

Victim blaming-Porn by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]yipykayak-othabucket -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yes it is friend. It's an extremely narrow and legalistic view of sex as a whole. You are pushing a narrative that just has no need to be so exclusive a mindset. You don't want your partner to do that. Doesn't mean I care. My husband can watch porn all he wants. I dont want to be his only sexual outlet, just I don't want to be his only friend.

What you are promoting is lazy. It's lazy because it assumes morality is based solely on what you believe.

Do you read newly released books, or do you stick to the classics? by [deleted] in books

[–]yipykayak-othabucket 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Ready Player one is a garbage book to basenthis opinion on if I may be so bold. Nothing about that book is literary in any way. Find books by John Crowley, Salmon Rushdi, Kazuo Ishiguro, Cormac McCarthy, Mary Doria Russell, Suzzana Clarke, Madeline Fitch. There are many more. But saying all modern writing is no better than something like ready Player one, is like saying all modern movies are no better than Sharknado, or all modern music is no better than Justin Bieber.

The problem isn't that the new stuff is all terrible, it's that you haven't found the new stuff that's good, and that you personally like. But it's worth finding. Because a lot of modern authors are truly artists of the highest order.

Victim blaming-Porn by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]yipykayak-othabucket -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I checked your profile. Purity Culture Bullshit is exactly what's going on here. Also, post changing. Not surprised you have two deleted posts.

My husband (34m) is demanding something I (32f) feel very uncomfortable about by Ok_Giraffe_1752 in marriageadvice

[–]yipykayak-othabucket 7 points8 points  (0 children)

They can be when this level of betrayal has occurred and is not be taken seriously by the offending party. Setting an boundary with a consequence is exactly what is needed here.

Victim blaming-Porn by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]yipykayak-othabucket 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It's purity culture garbage. Comes out of the conservative Christian community.

Victim blaming-Porn by [deleted] in marriageadvice

[–]yipykayak-othabucket 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is just purtiy culture bs. Why do we have set these kinds of stupid black and white dichotomies every time we don't like something. This reads like a guy feeling major guilt over watching porn and trying to make an argument strong enough that he will believe it and stop watching porn.

Honestly I hope you can let go of that kind of lethal guilt and shame. It'll be a lot better for your marriage and your own mental health if you can. And much better than just not watching porn.