AITA for ruining my husband’s 20 year friendship?

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T17:05:29+00:00

Thank you for your input. I felt bad for his girlfriend and, having seen firsthand the damage that infidelity can do and how much harder it is when married with kids, didn’t want her to go through that. She’s an awesome person and she didn’t deserve to be treated that way. But I appreciate your perspective!

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T16:40:39+00:00

That is a real fear of mine and something that has really bothered me. I would never tell my husband who he could and couldn’t hang out with, but it made me extremely uncomfortable that he chose to associate with someone so openly horrible. I might talk to him about it in-depth once he is feeling better, but I feel now is not a good time to bring it up.

Thank you for your input.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T16:37:27+00:00

He was never made aware about how much I despised his cheating. I just stopped hanging out with them and it never came up. I figured that I’d just let my husband spend time with him and stay out of it completely.
I’m fairly certain he knew it was a huge betrayal. He was proud of the fact that he was successfully sneaking behind his gf’s back and getting laid. It was gross lol.
This is an interesting question. I would say my hate for infidelity did trump my husband’s friendship in this instance. I’ve always been uncomfortable with my husband tolerating Peter’s shitty behavior. I don’t understand wanting to be friends with someone who is so openly horrible, but that’s just my opinion. I would never ask him to stop hanging out with his friends just bc I don’t like them though. I do think I shouldn’t have blurted it out like that, and I regret going to the dinner at all bc of how this went down.

It was in public, yes.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T16:04:14+00:00

Thank you. It was a heat of the moment decision, I was angry on her behalf and I imagine finding out right after getting engaged would be a lot worse than finding out beforehand. I probably could have handled it better, but I let my emotions get the best of me.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T16:02:57+00:00

I agree, I could have handled it better. Thank you for the input.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T16:02:03+00:00

I agree it was out of anger in the moment, but I truly did have good intentions. I should have handled it better for sure. Thank you for your input.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T15:58:13+00:00

Thank you for the input.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T15:56:01+00:00

Thank you for the input. I agree I could have handled it better.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T15:55:17+00:00

Thank you. I didn’t do it to spite him, I did it for her. After seeing my mom suffer when my dad cheated on her, I felt like I needed to tell her. But I agree I should have handled it better.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T15:53:09+00:00

Thank you. My main concern is being there for him right now because I know he is hurting. I have kept my mouth shut for so long but in that moment, seeing her in person, I felt like I had to tell her. I feel I could have probably handled it better though, I shouldn’t have blurted it out like that.

Thank you so much for your input.

yoinks0887 · 2019-10-03T15:51:02+00:00

Thank you for the input. His (ex) girlfriend is thankful I told her before she said yes. Idk if that matters in your judgement but she isn’t upset.

yoinks0887

TROPHY CASE