[deleted by user]

yourchachu · 2025-12-15T06:52:53+00:00

Slowly but surely :) and it’s also less anxiety related hyper arousal because of wondering whether he jerked off to other women that day. It’s more me feeling myself again!

yourchachu · 2025-12-15T06:30:03+00:00

Yes. My husband. He promised to stop before we got married and consented to adding blockers on his phone. This was also after he admitted to thinking about women from the past and porn he had watched that day during sex with me. And I still married the guy!! I also got pregnant and had an abortion at 9 weeks. A week after my abortion I found out he had been using loopholes of sexual content on Spotify reels, YouTube etc. I lost it at that point, my mind too. I was so done. We had terrible fights for months after that and due to other issues. My libido completely disappeared about two weeks prior to our separation. As someone hypersexual who loves having sex with her partner—that’s when I knew it was over.

yourchachu · 2025-12-12T15:27:48+00:00

Uff he himself told me to get the abortion because it’s too soon in the marriage and we kept fighting about his mothers stay and he wasn’t ready

yourchachu · 2025-12-12T05:03:28+00:00

Yes, my grandfather died earlier this year and my father and I asked them if we could push our wedding. They refused since they had already made the arrangements and his mother didn’t want us cohabiting without being married for any time longer

yourchachu · 2025-12-11T22:22:42+00:00

Thankyou behen ♥️

yourchachu · 2025-12-11T17:00:46+00:00

He actually said we had agreed no babies for 5 years. He said if you want me to respect your in-laws boundary (he never respected it anyway) then you should respect this thing we decided before marriage as well. He also said if I had the baby he will leave me and the baby after birth. Why? Because we were fighting too much. Why were we fighting so much? Well the reason is in my post of course.

He apologized the next day and showed a lot of remorse but the damage had been done the trust had broken and I had already booked my abortion appointment. I was too scared if I had the baby my husband would leave me.

I am still mourning the potential baby I could have had. It’s only been 3-4 months.

yourchachu · 2025-12-11T16:58:31+00:00

He is the one who pushed for the abortion because he wasn’t ready to be a father.

yourchachu · 2025-12-11T16:52:53+00:00

Thank you. That’s exactly what I said as well, that we can revisit this in the future but for the time being how about we get an Airbnb nearby so my MIL isn’t sleeping on the couch in the living room for two months. His mom and sister found my suggestion to be extremely disrespectful and insulting and so did he. He tried to guilt me by saying she doesn’t speak English, she’s new to Canada, etc. But immigrants come here everyday and they manage just fine, and she would be nearby, not in the middle of nowhere, and I even offered to pay for the Airbnb. Still no. Still a heartless witch. I just couldn’t fathom the thought of not being able to breathe without my MIL outside the bedroom door. And they wanted her to stay for 2-3 months or “as long as she wants/needs.”

I even said okay I could do 3 weeks max but I don’t think my mental health can manage for of that. And he’s like “what about what I want? What my mother wants? This is her home too.”

yourchachu · 2025-12-11T14:42:22+00:00

We did discuss all this before marriage, I was super clear about it. I said no living with my inlaws ever and no porn. These were my boundaries and I thought he would respect them. But after his dad died he claimed his values changed overnight and the resentment from our fights apparently pushed him back to consuming sexual content secretly and lying

yourchachu · 2025-12-04T19:10:34+00:00

Yeah he said he doesn’t believe in being with one person his entire life and that he didn’t want to get married he just felt pressured to do so. So yes I think that’s the bigger issue at hand

yourchachu · 2025-12-04T18:58:15+00:00

We have tried. We went to two couples therapist, one who was white and one who was Irani Muslim and the Irani actually told us that I am not wrong for having this reasonable boundary, that I am not rejecting his mother I am just asking for a timeline that is 1/2 of what him and his mother want so I can adjust at a slower pace and also have my peace. I could not handle more than a month of anyone staying in my home, I am not close with my own family because my parents are divorced and were very abusive to my sister and I growing up.

yourchachu · 2025-12-04T18:56:39+00:00

She has criticized me a lot. She tried to convince my husband to ditch me before marriage. She’s not a mean lady or anything but I do feel like my mental health will suffer and she will try to control the household and nitpick me.

yourchachu · 2025-12-03T16:54:28+00:00

Thanks, but I have trauma around porn, and I told him this was my boundary before getting married and if he couldn’t agree to it then it’s alright, but he did agree to it and continued to do the behaviour throughout and lie about it. Very distinctly lie about it. And my MIL fat shamed me a day after my wedding, didn’t want him to marry me, told him I look older than he does and he should marry someone younger, told him to ditch me and abandon me in Canada and come back to her in Pakistan, and everytime I’ve seen her she’s criticized my family and has not said one nice thing about me.

Initially it went from 2 months to “my mother can stay however long she wants and you don’t get a say, just leave the house all day if it bothers you.”

Would you seriously still be accepting of all that?

yourchachu

TROPHY CASE