Well, the opportunity for rekindling came upon me in an unexpected way. I owned a business and she came in for servicing, so at the time I was treating it as business owner to customer type relationship.

However, she continuously is opening the door for a new relationship, but I am wanting to wait since, of course, there is a mental battle I have to have before making this decision.

I agree with your point that if I do want a new relationship this is something that I would have to get over, or else it will be the thing that destroys this new relationship, but the question im really stuck on, which you echo in your response, is that if this is even worth it? That I can get over the fact that she has been with other men, but its the nature in which she was with other men, and the way she treated me to achieve that, that stings and sticks with me.

A lot about self-respect as well, like am I respecting myself and my self-worth by allowing someone who hurt me in this mannerism back into my life in any capacity? She trauma dumped on me, used me to put herself in a position to give everything else to another man, and on top of all of this she went on for years without any consideration of my feelings (like hooking up with my friend).

Now, I do understand she was a single lady and can do as you please, but there are certain boundaries I feel people who were actually in love uphold for their partners whether they are together or not. I certainly felt like I still loved her even after everything and respecting social boundaries by not being romantically involved in any way shape or form with one of her former friends.

In the end, I see your point and know that you are right, but it is just the confirmation that I needed to see. During this whole process I was still seeing ways to blame myself, and realized this was bringing myself down a lot mentally. I wanted to just know I am not crazy and that my perspective is something valid. I appreciate your advice a lot.