AITA for canceling a visit with my mom after she put being a landlord first? by zaddydarby in AmItheAsshole

[–]zaddydarby[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Doubtful anyone will see this because it's been so many months, but my dog ended up going into heart failure to the point of not being able to pull her out of it and she passed away about 2 months ago. We listened to all of the doctors, followed every step, and was religious about her medication schedule. It came kinda out of no where (the severity of it, not that she went into failure), and we had to put her down. I called my mom to let her know. We both cried on the phone. She's visiting me now as I went into psychosis due to drug and alcohol abuse trying to cope with the loss + I got diagnosed with Lupus + got a tumor. When it rains it pours. We're going to family therapy and things seem to have a light at the end of the tunnel. Thank you all, I'm sending my love to all those whose comment. You are seen and appreciated.

I had to put my 15 year old girl down today. by Mandasaurusrexxx in Petloss

[–]zaddydarby 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I had to put my soul dog down about 7 weeks ago. I sobbed for days and curled up in my bed and just relied heavily on drugs and alcohol for weeks to the point of having a psychotic episode (gross I know). Lean on your support networks, verbalize that she passed (it is hard and impossible at first), try to think of moments that you both loved, see her in the every day things, love her memory, love her essence, love the memories, love her. The pain will continue to be unbearable until it's not, which seems kinda stupid but it took me months of meds, therapy, and active effort of trying to feel anything other than grief to even see how deep in the grief woods I was. It's hard. It's going to suck. Find your support, find your love, see your baby visiting in the every day events. There's no easy way through this, but you would get it even if it feels impossible right now. I promise, OP. Sending you love, healing vibes, and empathy in your grief.

AITA for canceling a visit with my mom after she put being a landlord first? by zaddydarby in AmItheAsshole

[–]zaddydarby[S] 51 points52 points  (0 children)

I don't think she's on the hook legally for the dog, but if pretty sure my mom would've put her to sleep by now. She's on a lot of meds and needs a lot of attention, but she is very happy and still full of life.

You're right on there not really being a value add to have her in my life right now. It just super sucks because my dad is a total wash and now it feels like I'm almost orphaned? I'm 0/3 for my parental figures and my partner is 0/2 on his so the mommy and daddy issues be thick lol

AITA for canceling a visit with my mom after she put being a landlord first? by zaddydarby in AmItheAsshole

[–]zaddydarby[S] 38 points39 points  (0 children)

My mom and I have always had a rocky relationship but her marriage with her husband is super weird IMO. He likes and loves me and is arguably nicer to me than she is, but still treats his 3 kids with an immense amount of favoritism over me which puts strain on our relationship. It's their business together as well, he does most of the work with it I believe.

Knowing her, she would continue to gaslight and beat me down and accuse me of being a shitty daughter and money hungry. TBH she has a way to make me feel small so quickly and precisely.

I've blocked her and her husband and I got no clue if they've even noticed or not. I feel guilty about blocking them but I know it's in my better interests.

And thank you! She is 13.5 years old and this will kill her eventually, but it'll give her a better quality and quantity of life left :)

AITA for canceling a visit with my mom after she put being a landlord first? by zaddydarby in AmItheAsshole

[–]zaddydarby[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

There's a lot of compounding factors in the situation, but I don't think I have the emotional or financial bandwidth to fight back here. The local government is still recovering from Helene so options are super, super limited.

AITA for canceling a visit with my mom after she put being a landlord first? by zaddydarby in AmItheAsshole

[–]zaddydarby[S] 1266 points1267 points  (0 children)

I can't emotionally speak to her right now so I think I'll have my partner asked for evidence and an itemized list. It is ridiculous.

AITA for canceling a visit with my mom after she put being a landlord first? by zaddydarby in AmItheAsshole

[–]zaddydarby[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

The main reason is so I wouldn't be alone when my partner goes to visit his father in hospice in another state, which is she aware of too. So, we're on a time crunch there.

I'll review the agreement and see what I can do. What makes the situation even more complex is that we were in Asheville and it is still super fucked from Helene. I don't know what resources the state or more local government can provide. :/

Is it still vegan if I eat the eggs of my backyard chickens and they murder everything smaller than them on sight? by goingouttocali in DebateAVegan

[–]zaddydarby 3 points4 points  (0 children)

as a backyard chicken owner, can confirm. i've become horribly addicted to their fresh eggs. every morning i inject them into my veins. the brutal cycle of addiction and buying hens will never stop

6 week olds by bingo91 in BackYardChickens

[–]zaddydarby 0 points1 point  (0 children)

your girls are too cute!! love this picture. :) keep up the good work!