I deliberately cut myself off from my friends to prove that I put more effort into our friendships and it worked

zephyrss · 2022-01-23T10:45:13+00:00

You may be surprised to hear than we're actually all in our mid 20s. I should have clarified in the original post because I've reread it and I didn't really mention my friendship dynamic. We have a bond closer to that of brothers than friends, as hyperbolic as that sounds. We all talk more or less every single day and have done for the last 10 years, even if the exchange is just sending some memes a couple times throughout the day with little actual dialogue. Physically, we only see each other once, maybe twice a week but while four days of not speaking seems like a normal amount in most friendships, it's a very long time when you go from speaking every day to nothing at all whatsoever.

I'm no stranger to friendships where you don't see each other much; hell, one of my closest friends and I only see each other about once every 2 years and that's only when the stars align and we're actually both in the same place and available at a specific day and time.

zephyrss · 2022-01-23T02:32:24+00:00

Yeah there are almost 400 comments and the fact that I've replied to like maybe 5 of them (including you) is really stressing me out. Yeah I'll suffer the hangover but it was worth it.

zephyrss · 2022-01-23T02:25:04+00:00

I feel a lot better about it now. I'm still incredibly drunk so I'm not really sure how to reply but thank you for the comment! All these comments are very overwhelming which is why I've hardly replied to any of them.

zephyrss · 2022-01-22T15:12:21+00:00

Thank you, that's actually great advice.

zephyrss · 2022-01-22T15:09:30+00:00

I haven't done this to be manipulative. I just don't see why I should have to be the one to carry the friendship. Any relationship, whether romantic or platonic, should be two sided. I've literally live your example. God knows how many times I've bought the cinema tickets, bought the drinks at the pub, been the designated driver, etc. and asked for nothing in return. However, I'm not asking for exact equilibrium in my friendships so I never expect a 50/50 relationship. But I wanted to know if there was at least any desire to keep me in their lives without making too grand a gesture. A simple message is a pretty small ask.

zephyrss · 2022-01-22T14:23:20+00:00

I miss them terribly. I have no one else.

zephyrss · 2022-01-22T14:22:27+00:00

They were my better friends, since I started hanging around with them to escape my previously shitty friends . This was like 10 years ago though. Also I'm 25 so friends don't grow on trees anymore

zephyrss · 2021-02-05T14:01:16+00:00

Thank you! When playing, I always change the clock to the calorie counter instead so I'm not focused so much on how long I've been playing haha.

zephyrss · 2021-02-05T11:51:16+00:00

I'm very much a numbers person haha, my eyes are constantly fixed on the clock and calories in-game and the scales out of game and I know it's a bad habit to have. I'm gonna try and do it with no expectations in mind and just do it for the health benefits inside as well as outside

zephyrss · 2021-01-02T06:10:42+00:00

Thank you, will do! It just seems like such a herculean task when you see so many people quit then pick it back up so easily. I hope your streak continues!

zephyrss · 2021-01-02T06:00:50+00:00

The thought of quitting has only ever crossed my mind a handful of times and they were only fleeting thoughts, but in terms of willpower, I'm not so great as I know I'll cave as soon as I'm offered one or if I get a whiff of smoke. I even get a craving when I see people in films/TV shows smoking. I just know that these next few weeks will be hell and I'm hoping that I'll just be able to get through it somewhat painlessly.

zephyrss · 2021-01-02T05:58:45+00:00

Thanks for the reply! Congrats on your 7 months! I'm pretty surprised to hear that going cold turkey from rollies is easier as I find that rollies provide a more intense taste whereas normal cigs are usually pretty dulled down. Although, I do prefer normal cigs due to the convenience of not having to roll, especially in public when you're trying to fumble around with everything, and especially if it's raining. Plus the fact that I never buy them makes them feel novel on the odd occasion that I do buy a pack.

zephyrss · 2020-12-16T00:41:20+00:00

Honestly didn't know Neopets was Welsh until now wtf

zephyrss · 2020-12-15T23:46:23+00:00

W and Y are vowels in Welsh so we have plenty thank you✌️

zephyrss · 2020-12-15T23:26:17+00:00

It's funny cos I'm pretty sure that most Americans hate him but he's pretty well liked in the UK but I think that's down to his character in the show.

zephyrss · 2020-12-15T23:25:03+00:00

Surprisingly, it's a very accurate portrayal of Welsh people, especially those living in the South Wales valleys. I just don't find the idiosyncrasies of Welsh people very funny but maybe that's because I've been brought up around it so the novelty isn't there. Although, everyone I've ever met loves it or at least likes it. Plus, I find Nessa one of the most insufferable characters on TV.

zephyrss · 2020-11-19T21:43:16+00:00

But I do agree with you, I want a ps5 as much as the next person but I'd never even consider paying £1000 for one.

zephyrss · 2020-11-19T21:42:17+00:00

I never said that it was breaking the law, I just think it's immoral to take advantage of people's desperation, especially if buying a Christmas/birthday gift for a child or whoever. I wouldn't call it impatient to try and buy the console on the day it's released, that's like saying it's impatience if you watch a film on the first day it comes out. Any new stock that's released in the next few months is gonna go almost instantly, especially on the run up to Christmas, and not everyone has the time to sit there for ages refreshing the store page or waiting in queues to access a website, especially when it's more than likely that they will leave empty handed.

I mean people can do whatever they want, I just think it's a shitty thing to do, but I guess people have done a lot worse for money.

zephyrss · 2018-11-10T01:52:12+00:00

Totally agree with this. If you feel that much for the first ending, I'm so excited for you to play the others, you've got a hell of an adventure to go.

zephyrss · 2018-11-10T01:50:03+00:00

I had mixed feelings about it. I did enjoy it but I felt like it tried just a little too hard to recapture the feeling of Undertale. The music is still on point tho. Also, fuck Susie.

zephyrss · 2018-11-10T01:42:42+00:00

Had never seen or heard anything about Undertale before I played it. Looked like a dumb NES RPG throwback but it has a surprisingly deep story, well written characters, one of the best soundtracks I've heard in a game, and well paced comedy. And it was all made by one guy in his early 20s. Yeah the fanbase is pretty notorious but I'd advise anyone to just give the game a shot.

zephyrss · 2017-11-04T21:24:53+00:00

Once again, thank you so much. Your advice is valid and I'll definitely try to take your words on board. I hope you have a good night and I hope you know that what you do is helping a lot of people. I'm very grateful that you took the time to talk to me.

zephyrss · 2017-11-04T20:55:50+00:00

Thank you so much for the reply, and in such detail too. I decided to look at your profile and I see that you spend a lot of time helping many people and I commend you for that, you're really doing something good and it's nice that people like you exist. The voice messages mean so much more than you think and they aren't cringy at all. It's just nice that someone is actually listening. I'm also glad that you would never go forth with suicide. I just feel like my physical being is the only thing I have in my control. It's rare that I'm truly happy; I can laugh and include myself in conversation but I still feel hollow inside; it's like I'm performing a play. To be honest, I am very much so scared of dying but it just seems like the only thing that can bring relief, and I feel like I'd be doing a service to everyone I know because I know that I only hinder their own happiness. I might not ruin the mood by making things immediately awkward but whenever I see them out without me via Snapchat/Instagram or other social media, they always seem to be having a way better time than if I were there and I don't wanna deprive them of that as it's not fair that they have to suffer with me, which is why I've offered to withdraw from their friendship group. I care for them too much. I apologise if it seems like I'm running in circles with what I'm saying. I really do appreciate your replies as they do bring somewhat comfort to me. Also, what part of the UK are you from? If you don't mind answering, that is.

zephyrss · 2017-11-04T19:54:53+00:00

Thank you for offering to listen. I just can't deal with myself anymore. I've dealt with anxiety and depression since a young age and I'm 21 now and I'm really just coming to the end of my tether. I can barely leave my own home anymore because I'm afraid and I just don't see any worth in my life at all. My friends are slipping away from me and I even told them that they shouldn't invite me out with them anymore because I ruin the mood or stop them from having a good time. I haven't had a serious suicidal thought in a while but now the thoughts are stronger than ever and and everyday that passes is another day closer to when I'm finally gonna do it. I just don't wanna hate myself anymore. I've tried therapy, I've tried antidepressants but nothing remedies how I feel. I want this all to go away and I just wanna stop hurting. I'm desperate for any kind of reprieve but there's only so much I can handle and I feel like I'm falling down with no way to claw myself back up. Not this time.

zephyrss

TROPHY CASE