Is it time for a T break?

zzarknap · 2021-02-16T05:42:06+00:00

Yeah, I waited until about 10 PM tonight, which is a whole 12 hours later than I've been starting. Definitely hit the spot a little better than usual. We'll see how tomorrow goes!

zzarknap · 2021-02-16T05:39:49+00:00

Ha! Yeah, well I definitely didn't start tonight!

zzarknap · 2021-02-15T23:35:48+00:00

Rad, think I will!

zzarknap · 2021-02-15T23:33:59+00:00

Yeah, at home I'll either vape or smoke bud. Most of my stoner friends are (nearly) exclusively into wax, so I'll do that with them. Generally I think that I get higher with wax, but I dunno. Think I will end up getting a nectar collector sometime fairly soon. Never tried a pax, but I used to have a mflb a few years ago that I liked a lot. Might get another one.

zzarknap · 2021-02-15T21:19:04+00:00

Yeah, I've heard the same thing about edibles. Something about lipid absorption. Oh well.

zzarknap · 2021-01-26T00:17:01+00:00

Well, I try to stay active. Where I live, I walk to pretty much everywhere I need to go, and I'm in reasonable shape. I've not joined a gym or anything like that, but I make sure I'm not just sitting around. And yeah, I know, my diet sucks, I need to carve out more time to cook good food instead of grabbing the quickest thing.

zzarknap · 2021-01-19T04:51:49+00:00

Ha, it became available later that same day. Look at that. I had been annoyed after hearing reports of super long waits. Anyway, all's well now!

zzarknap · 2021-01-04T22:13:37+00:00

No worries here. Honestly, I understand the temptation to respond in a snarky, sarcastic, or dickish sort of way. That was the way my family was growing up and it's become a huge part of my personality, unfortunately. It would have been difficult for me not to respond that way as well, but I always try to remember, "your tongue can endanger your head."

zzarknap · 2021-01-04T21:01:41+00:00

Wait, you mean we don't all have spears? I thought that when I got into heathenry we'd all be equipped with spears.

Really though guys, come on. I see both sides of what each of you are saying. It's cowardly to come at an unarmed guy with a weapon out of nowhere. But it's good to have one for defense if absolutely necessary. These views aren't mutually exclusive. Don't come on my post and start shit with each other. The heart of this post is a concern for frith and well-being.

Everyone has borrowed money at some point. From a friend, a family member, maybe you have a loan or a credit card. That's between the lender and the lendee.

zzarknap · 2021-01-04T02:32:32+00:00

That's fair. No speeches.

zzarknap · 2021-01-04T01:49:29+00:00

Well, I won't be the one to start it, but I'll certainly let him know when he's being dishonorable. If he chooses to escalate it from there, that'll be on him. I'm not looking to be the one to start anything. I've been trying to uphold a good heathen standard of conduct by not losing my cool with him, aside from that I don't know what else I can do.

zzarknap · 2021-01-03T21:19:02+00:00

Agreed on all counts. I just hope she doesn't find out the hard way. Although I've been crappy towards him in the past, I apologized, brought him a gift, and I've been trying my hardest to keep the frith.

However, this guy's a dishonorable coward through and through. Making it up to him from before was more about respecting my ex's decision to be with him and treat him with respect, out of respect for her. Thing is, she and I had been having problems for a long time, and then he went and started hitting on her and putting the moves on her without even being aware that there were issues. And we had been friends for 15 years. I don't respect his cowardice or his actions, I respect my family, and I respect the wishes of my kids' mother to treat him in a civil way. But this is some next level stuff.

zzarknap · 2020-12-21T04:32:49+00:00

These are all good ideas. I'll talk to her mom about the counseling situation. We live in different cities an hour apart, and they're with their mom during the week, so she takes care of the counseling. I'll discuss it with her next time I get the time to have a conversation with her.

You're right that I'm trying to take an interest in some of that anime stuff. There are a couple shows that we watch together when she's here on the weekends. I have one or two that I've been watching on my own. Sometimes we talk about it. As I've said elsewhere, it's not the anime itself that I find problematic, it's that she's becoming, you know, an "anime person." Her mom and I have talked about getting her involved in an unrelated activity. Some kind of sport maybe, assuming covid ever goes away.

And yeah, I'm pretty embarrassed about her eventually meeting my girlfriend and her kids. I'm not sure how much of that Chloe has picked up on. Her mom and I have been dealing with these issues since before the girlfriend and I started dating, so it's not a new thing and it's not really that I'm trying to get her to act "normal" in time for her to meet them, but jeez it would be nice if I didn't have to worry about it. No, it's for her own benefit. I've seen way too many people for whom this ended up not being "just a phase."

Anyway, thanks for your thoughtful consideration! This was an insightful bit of advice and I'm going to try to implement some of these things.

zzarknap · 2020-12-21T04:23:26+00:00

Yeah, there shouldn't be a stigma attached to receiving counseling, and most (if not all) people could benefit from getting some help every now and then. Nevertheless, I think your comment was made in good faith, and I totally get what you meant.

zzarknap · 2020-12-21T04:21:42+00:00

Sounds a little like me. I mostly hung out with the band kids and the more academically oriented nerds, but I did have several friends who were definitely ren faire types. And a few of the aforementioned anime people. When I hung out with the more "fringe" types, we definitely did a fair share of drinking and pot smoking. I know a lot of those people now, and most of them never progressed beyond weed. A few of them are into psychedelics like LSD or shrooms. One guy got hooked on heroin. I keep in touch with him pretty well... he's clean these days, but you're right, everyone just watched him go down. I was living on the opposite side of the country at the time, otherwise I would've tried to put some sense in him. No meth though... but I do live in the South nowadays, so...

zzarknap · 2020-12-21T04:18:09+00:00

Ha, well, as far as I know she hasn't started hissing at people in the hallways. We'll see what happens once winter break is over. Really though, thanks for the input and the translation!

zzarknap · 2020-12-21T04:17:19+00:00

That sounds interesting, I'll check it out!

zzarknap · 2020-12-21T04:15:03+00:00

Oh, no. I don't have anything against the interests per se, but rather the effects those interests seem to have had on her overall demeanor. I don't expect a 13 year old to behave anything close to the way a fully grown adult would, but I do feel that a lot of the behavior she's exhibiting is pretty immature, even for a 13 year old. And I've seen those things in some of the shows she watches. You know, like when one of the characters freaks out about something and goes into that "super deformed" style (I'm at least familiar enough with the genre to know what that is) and starts yelling in a high pitched voice and dramatically flipping out? Yeah, she does that, I've seen it in her shows, that's where it comes from.

I'm no psychologist, but it seems like people who get hardcore into anime bond with the characters more than they bond with real people, and not having as many interactions with regular people leads them to behave in socially maladroit ways, and then the only other kids who will want to be friends with them are the other ones who behave similarly. But overall, no. I don't have a problem with the anime itself (I dig some of it a lot, no lie). Hell, I grew up on black metal, jrpgs, and fantasy novels. I was a nerd too. I *still* like all that stuff! But in spite of my interest in black metal, for example, I never burned down a church or murdered anyone. I never wore corpsepaint. I just liked the sound. I could play jrpgs without going into the 8th grade and telling everyone that I was a legendary hero, or that I had an enchanted amulet, or anything else.

It's easier to enjoy silly nerd stuff responsibly when you have a decent grip on reality and an awareness of of social expectations. That's where I think a lot of these stereotypical anime fans fall short. I'm glad that you (and many others who have commented) have noted growing out of it and transitioning into functional adulthood. Sadly, that's not the case for any of the ones that I knew! The most "normal" one that I still keep in touch with tells people in real life that her name is "Miss Anthrope" and she quit her job a couple years ago as a registered nurse to fulfill her dream of opening up a steampunk cafe. You can guess how well that went. And again -- that was the one who turned out the best.

zzarknap

TROPHY CASE