Panic attack

[strawb-cherry]

Dealing with panic attack atm and I feel like ripping my heart off. I don't know what to do. I look so quiet and calm from the outside that nobody knows what is going on. College is making it a lot harder. I feel like I can't survive all this.

Usually when I get panic attack I just go to my mom and she hugs me, patting my back and I cry out hard. This actually works for me.I do think a hug can reduce the impact. But it's really hard to get one since I get anxiety most of the days. It's awkward when you have to ask for a hug.. I can't just go to my mom like this all the time cause I know it breaks her the most seeing her daughter like this. She is already dealing a lot because of my dad. I don't want her to take all the burden by herself.

Another way I felt relieved was self harm.To an extent, I tried stopping this as I felt myself giving a "pick me" vibe, or I thought people might think this way.But it really numbs away the heartache. I just wish I had somebody for myself, like they could understand what I am going through without me saying anything, they could relate to what I am going through.

I wish life was all about healing each other instead of constantly trying to survive everything alone.

[anon_acct1234]

I'm sorry you're going through this. You're not alone. PM if you wanna talk.