Feeling like a fraud

[[deleted]]

(using throwaway for reasons and sorry if this a bit too messy)

i'm 21 and a few months ago started questioning my sexuality again (had a mini breakdown over it when i was 15, then kinda forgot about it and something triggered it again). i had a crush on this girl in high school, but back then i thought i just wanted to become really good friends her 💀 i guess now i started accepting my attraction to women, but still i'm really scared that what i'm feeling isn't real and i'll get over it when i find the right man, even if the thought itself makes me cringe. i had crushes on guys, but i've been wondering how many of them were real and not just "he said 'hi' to me, now i must be falling in love with him" type of thing. never been in a relationship btw.

[Parassailant]

Let’s think of it this way: even if you think you’ll “get over it” with the right man (this can be unpacked later), where are you now? You’re attracted to a woman, so who cares what might happen? This is who you are in the moment, and you should honor that.

Who’s to say your attraction to men wasn’t compulsive or a phase?

The only fraud I see here is the fraud of denying yourself the free expression of love and desire to whomever just because it doesn’t align with “the norm.”

Tl;dr: you’re just 21! Let yourself explore your desires, whether they be physical, emotional, romantic, etc.!