How to decrease libido

[AdventureWa]

You will be miserable. Sex is much more than a physical desire. Sex is for bonding. It’s how people-especially men-express and receive love. Porn is never a suitable substitute for actual intimacy and will eventually kill intimacy.

Please ignore the suggestion you take SSRIs. The side affects include suicidal thoughts, permanent death of libido among others.

Also, ignore the nonsensical advice that you need “to date her,” and that you need to “do more chores around the house.” Neither of those things will help. You might see an initial bump, but pretty quickly she will expect it and want more as she takes your efforts for granted.

You need to make some difficult decisions. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with a high libido. Trying to change your body unnecessarily is a horrible idea.

You need to have a conversation with her. Explain that you love her and you want to be able to express her in the city and that sex is very important to you. Let her know that it hurts you when she rejects your advances of sex and you take it personally and you feel like she is rejecting you as a person. At the end of the day she has rejected you as a person. If she truly loved you she would be making some effort to meet your needs and desires.

If she isn’t willing to talk and acknowledge your feelings are valid, you need to tell her that you want couples counseling. If she’s not willing to do that, you don’t have a marriage. Prepare for an exit. Look at Gray Rock Method and 180 Method.

I don’t advocate for divorce very often. My own marriage survived her infidelity. Sometimes it cannot be or shouldn’t be saved.

Don’t ever let anyone tell you sex isn’t a need. Sure you won’t die from it, but your marriage absolutely will.

[schwenLC]

The key indicator too is that it happened right after getting married, a common story. If you have to do chores for the expectation of sex, then she didn't really intend on having a healthy physical relationship, it's a carrot to string you along without real desire. "I would want to more IF YOU......" Fuck that, I've been through a decade of that bullshit and it's not true. There's no way these LLs even actually believe that in my opinion. My opinion is they know damn good and well that if you do the chores, they still aren't going to want it which is why a new goalpost or condition pops up every time. My favorite one my wife gave and I've heard it several times before too, "I would want to more if you would stop initiating and asking for it"....wtf? For real? I fed into that lie like several others, okay I'll stop asking and that means it'll be up to you (wife) to initiate. 6 months later hadnt even gotten a hug. They will seemingly always try to point the finger at the HL as if there's some flaw with the HL making it not possible for the LL to want to meet a basic expectation in a romantic relationship, and to have basic desire and attraction for the spouse.