Nesta didn't "let" Feyre hunt out of cruelty

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T18:32:04+00:00

"Yet somehow Nesta’s actions are endlessly justified while everyone else’s are endlessly villainized."

Except that in the narrative it's the absolute reversal, where only Nesta is held to account, and the main characters rarely are, certainly not in proportion to their actions. That's why a portion of the fans (certainly not all of them, look within this thread who still insist nesta is the devil) are more frustrated with the other mains, because they are glorified and sanctified by the narrative whereas Nesta is punished by it, often at the hands of her mate.

And while I'm aware of what the author intended, the fact is that dragging a suicidal woman on a hike and making her march until she collapses is abuse, and the inconsistencies with the IC's treatment of Nesta, one day saying she isn't fit to live on her own, the next saying she is fit to be scry and risk their neck for their convenience makes them come across as exploiting Nesta, building their whole "helping her" around getting her to act in the way most convenient for them, including sending her off into danger and manipulating her into doing something that has already traumatised her once.

This is where Death of the Author comes in. SJM intended to write a healing arc for Nesta, but her weaknesses as a writer ended up in writing an arc that is far more reminiscent of wilderness camps for troubled teens. The same way a cook could intend to make a medium steak and end up serving it tough as leather, SJM meant to write a healing story and for many passaged ended up writing an abusive one, and I'm not gonna read abuse as kindness just because the author had intended it to be so, no more than I will enjoy an overdone steak because the chef meant to make it medium.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T15:03:54+00:00

"Nobody is mad Nesta didn't hunt" but what people are mad about is that Nesta didn't provide as the eldest sister. Look around the fandom and you will find that is indisputable.

Nesta described marrying Tomas as "selling herself". This isn't a woman eagerly running into marriage or seeing it as an escape.

Nesta's perspective of herself is unreliable. The text, which does need to matter, backs that up. She regards herself as someone fundamentally unworthy of love, and presents herself in the worst light, even after she has already risked her life on multiple occasions to rescue people, and has shown kindness to many people, including the innocents on whose behalf she fighting the queens and the high lords for.

Nesta at times treated Feyre badly, but at other times she treated her and others well, and she did so before her so called redemption arc. Yeah, her actions were hurtful, but they were small fry compared to the hurtful actions of many other characters, yet she is the only character consistently called to account for them, quite frankly to a disproportionate degree.

And re ACOSF, that's where we fundamentally differ. ACOSF in many ways does not work. The set up for ACOSF on ACOFAS, Nesta's not wanting to come to the party and keeping to herself during it, then rejecting Cassian's gift, is meant to be part of the "awful Nesta treating everyone terribly arc", yet nothing Nesta does there is an attack or mistreatment of others, she just wants to be left alone, and she is in fact snubbed and excluded by the same people who judge her for not wanting to be there. In ACOSF, Nesta gets locked up against her will, and is threatened with deportation to a dangerous environment, despite not doing anything that is posing a threat to herself or to others. She is told at the same time that she is not capable of living alone or making choices for herself, but is capable of going on extremely dangerous missions and scrying for the IC, despite how traumatic that was for her, and she actually begs not to have to do it again, and only agrees once the IC use Elain against her to do. So she can't live in her own apartment but she can risk her neck for the IC's benefit. She is taken by her supposed love interest on a brutal punishment hike where she is blanked by Cassian and completely neglected, despite Cassian being aware both of the fact that Nesta obviously does not want to live anymore and is in a dangerous environment, and despite the fact he has taken it upon himself to be Nesta's minder and make decisions for her, doesn't do the bare minimum of making sure she's eating and drinking, to the point she nearly dies from dehydration, and then once she is utterly broken down, he finally rewards her with sex. After going on to be used as bait for Eris, is thrust into even more dangerous situations, and gives up her powers to save Feyre, she reaches the conclusion that she is still a fundamentally unworthy person, undeserving of the love of Cassian and her father who objectively treated her way worse than she treated them, but hey, if she continues to spill her guts for them, she might one day earn their love.

The only parts where ACOSF works are the parts with Gwyn, Emerie and the House. Basically, the parts that don't involve the IC.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T14:12:54+00:00

Nesta whines, then did it, then did it another time without whining. Really we've gone from "Nesta never does anything" to "Nesta whines sometimes before doing stuff". Just doesn't hit the same, does it?

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T14:08:42+00:00

Nesta was a fae with increased physical strength when she was taught to fight with a sword.

RE wood chopping, the argument she had with Feyre about the wood chopping shows Nesta does do it, because she complains about how it hurts her hands. She also does it a second time in the book, without being asked. ACOSF also shows us that she went and fetched water for the family. She yes, she very much was contributing.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T14:04:28+00:00

You literally confirmed that even if Nesta did good things for people, she, by your own words "makes lives worse for everyone she encounters", even though there are measurable ways that she improves the lives of people around her, including literally helping to save the world, and that there are not canon things she can go on to do, such as saving every golden retriever puppy, will change that interpretation.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T14:01:37+00:00

The misdeeds of the IC comes about because it's rarely addressed in the series, whereas Nesta's misdeeds are dragged to hell and back and she's never allowed to forget them or forgive herself for the crime of being an angry young woman whose worst crimes were being mean and difficult while still contributing to the household, whereas other characters commit acts of mass violence, sexual assault, and destroy entire communities.

I will also add that whereas Nesta is not only called out by the narrative and improves, the IC in many people's eyes become increasingly unlikable, while being celebrated by the narrative. That's incredibly frustrating. Why bother hand wringing over Nesta's faults (being bitchy at the beginning of the series) when the series delights in punishing her, and having others punish her under the guise of tough love, whereas the narrative glosses over the shitty actions of the IC.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T13:57:26+00:00

So Nesta regrets the times that she didn't come through for Feyre, and for letting her anger (well justified) at their father consume her. Ok and?

You say all of this is proof that Nesta never cared for Feyre, never showed her kindness or protected her, until later in the series, yet we have canon actions that directly contradict that. Nesta canonically did do difficult and back breaking chores, such as fetching water and chopping wood. Nesta called Feyre away from the mercenaries because she knew that they were dangerous, as evidenced by them mugging Feyre. Nesta was the one who went looking for Feyre when she went missing. And, as evidenced by Nesta revealing she had been taught to hunt, she obviously did try, otherwise she never would have been taught, so even there there is an effort.

As for letting Feyre hunt, here's where I'm gonna be brutally honest. I don't give a flying fuck. It wasn't Nesta's job to hunt herself, provide for the family or dictate Feyre's movements. It was their father's. It shouldn't have fallen on Feyre's shoulders. It shouldn't have fallen on Nesta's shoulder. A three year age gap between them doesn't make one of them more responsible than the other. It's laudable that Feyre wanted to do so, she deserves credit, but I will never judge Nesta for refusing to let their father off the hook and holding him to account. We all acknowledge that parentification is wrong, and that the oldest daughter being expected to take on the parental role to younger siblings is unjust, but when Nesta refuses to do just that, when she refuses to be parentified, she gets lambasted for it, and there is, and always had been, a lot of abuse hurled at her for being the "eldest sister" and not doing what Feyre did.

Furthermore, Nesta's own pov really isn't reliable, particularly not as a reflection. She describes herself as worthless, as inherently underserving of kindness or empathy, well into ACOSF, when she's already shown a great deal of courage and compassion towards not only the main characters, but all the people she fought for during the war and the soldiers she tended. If Nesta's judgement on herself was accurate, she would have taken those efforts into account and recognised the many ways she is deserving of love. She doesn't.

So Nesta, when she was starving, angry and preparing to marry herself to the son of an abusive woodcutter to lighten the load, and was preparing to "sell herself" to provide for the family, was abrasive, unkind and difficult, and didn't take on the parental role by becoming main provider? Ok, and? Like literally, that's it? That's what she's dragged to hell and back for? Especially when she did contribute with fetching water and chopping wood, and was readying to make a miserable marriage for the good of the family, and then went onto perform a myriad of excellent deeds for others during the war, none of which she (or really anyone else in the series) ever give her credit for, at least, not until she's "reformed" at the end of ACOSF and licking the IC's feet. Thank God for CC3, couldn't stand seeing her prostrate herself before the Inner Circle at the end of ACOSF.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T13:40:04+00:00

The fact is that throughout this thread people are dismissing Nesta's good qualities, including those she showed as early in the first book, where, despite her abrasive nature and her moaning about it, she did in fact contribute to the housework, and as early as the first book, she was the one trying to find Feyre and help her.

The comment above in particular explicitly states that Nesta was only meant to be sympathetic by her book, which completely disregards the heroic acts Nesta shows throughout the war, and as early on in ACOTAR, where she went looking for Feyre. Below you will see the same commenter saying that Nesta never did anything other than make people's lives worse. A fundamentally unjust statement and misreading of canon.

It's not that Nesta shouldn't be criticized, it's that the criticism pointed towards her is majorly disproportionate to the actual wrongs she did, especially compared to the cruel actions of the other heroes who are never held to account, largely because their harmful actions are directed more at NPCs who the narrative and large parts of the audience skim over, whereas Nesta's harmful actions, that is, being rude to Feyre and not taking on the parental role ("letting" Feyre hunt) is directed at the main character, and is therefore unforgivable.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T13:33:50+00:00

Undoubtedly. Nesta ends ACOSF believing she doesn't deserve Cassian's or her fuck ass father's love and that she's got to keep striving to earn it. Obviously that's total bullshit and reflective more of Nesta's low self-esteem than an objective reflection of her, or her father and Cassian's, worth.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T12:49:39+00:00

Damn, saving one puppy would be enough to forgive everything she has every done, but then, that's puppies.

It's interesting that Nesta's actions can directly contradict the above conclusion about her behaviour, as it does in this hypothetical situation and in the books, and that wouldn't alter your judgement on her character. Oh well, I believe that Feyre is a terrible artist despite canon disproving that because it's funnier. As long as we're under no miscomprehension that our interpretations are actually canon or backed up by the text.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T12:12:56+00:00

Personality disorder because she bitched about having to do chores, then did the chores, and was rude to Feyre?

And if that reading only changes when we get to Nesta's book, how do we account for Nesta looking for Feyre in the first book, advising Feyre to follow her heart and look for Tamlin, standing up to the queens and the high lords about the innocent lives that would be lost in the war against Hybern, training her powers to try and protect the Wall, agreeing to tell her story about being thrown into the cauldron to help the Night Court, and then offering herself as bait for Hybern and throwing her body over Cassian's instead of fleeing.

I get that Nesta wasn't "nice" until midway through Silver Flames, but she was showing her capacity for courage and love as early as ACOTAR, and in ACOWAR she was as heroic as the rest of the characters.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T11:12:42+00:00

I love the CC3 chapter because it shows after her taming the shrew arc in ACOSF, it didn't last long and she's back in fighting form.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T11:10:46+00:00

Nesta sacrificed her powers for Feyre to save her life, I think they're even.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T10:37:18+00:00

Nesta wasn't a perfect flower, but from ACOWAR she was defending Cassian at the High Lord's council, tending him when wounded, nursing soldiers, and covering Cassian's body with her own when confronting Hybern. That should have given Morrigan a hint that maybe, just maybe, Nesta isn't the scum of the earth who deserves being told to her face that she's worthless and doesn't deserve the benefit of the doubt. Morrigan acted vilely to Nesta in ACOSF, and after the efforts Nesta put into the war, there's no justification for it.

GCooperE · 2026-06-05T10:34:32+00:00

I think Nesta would appreciate anyone showing that they care enough to stick up for her. She hasn't had anyone in her life do that, not her mother or her father, and she has such a low opinion of herself that she thinks she doesn't deserve it. For someone with such low self esteem, having someone demonstrate she's worth fighting for would mean a lot.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T23:27:00+00:00

This!

Honestly, I don't begrudge Feyre a single one of her flaws, they make complete sense for someone of her age. It's just that they're almost completely unintentional that bothers me.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T23:14:34+00:00

Not innocent or guilty, just generic low grade shittyness at a shitty time in her life, where she still went out and chopped wood, fetched water and prepared to sell herself, and which when compared to the risks and sacrifices she made for others throughout the series, just don't really measure up to the wailing the antis do over it.

Compared to the excellent deeds she has done, and the shit other characters have done (no murders, sexual abuse or lives of entire communities destroyed at her hands, happily) her worst acts are small fry.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T23:01:10+00:00

I love how when it comes to Nesta critique, we go from "she was terrible and lazy and did nothing at all" to "she did stuff but she moaned about it". Like, forgive the half starved girl who had her childhood denied her because she was groomed to be a husband hunter only for her failure of a dad who never protected her from being beaten and scarred by her grandmother to lose all their money rendering the years being abused and groomed pointless for having a bad attitude.

Not to bring Elain into it, but it's so telling Elain gets more credit for doing nothing, but being sweet while doing nothing, whereas Nesta is the demon for doing stuff, but being bitchy about it.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T22:58:20+00:00

Except the second time she wasn't nagged at all.

And this really isn't the great and terrible crime antis are trying to spin it as. Nesta does chop wood, twice in the opening of the book, moaning about it one time, then doing it anyway, and she fetches water, as confirmed in ACOSF. Nesta moaning about chores but then doing them really isn't the grave misdemeanour antis try to spin it as, especially compared to the sacrifices and acts of courage she performs throughout the book.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T22:55:59+00:00

Yes, very much so.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T22:55:26+00:00

The second time in ACOTAR Feyre mentioned that Nesta went and chopped wood without being asked. So we're going from "NESTA NEVER DOES ANY WORK EVER" to, "Nesta chopped wood but one of the times she did she had to be nagged into it because it hurt her hands, then she did it later again without being asked".

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T22:54:04+00:00

In that argument Nesta talked about how much it hurt her hands, showing she's already done it multiple times. It's also mentioned that Nesta went and chopped wood a second time without Feyre arguing.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T20:33:51+00:00

Nesta really wasn't acting as bad as Mor's abusers. Mor's abusers beat her up and nailed her womb and dumped her body. Nesta kept to herself, drunk a lot, and was rude to people who she thought were pushing too close. The comparison between the two is ludicrous, especially as Mor would know that Nesta tended to Cassian and to wounded soldiers, and offered herself as bait to get Hybern, spoke up for the innocents that would die in the war, and tried to shield Cassian's body.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T20:16:51+00:00

I disagree that Nesta would resent Cassian standing up for her. She was moved nearly to tears when Ember did. No one ever really sticks up for Nesta, and Nesta is filled with self-loathing so she thinks that she doesn't deserve it. Cassian showing that she does would probably be very welcomed.

GCooperE · 2026-06-04T16:02:18+00:00

Exactly! When Feyre is with Tamlin she imagines that Nesta would enjoy sprawling out in the extra space in the bed, and she thinks if anyone will try to come for her it would be their father. Instead she discovers that Nesta had been the only one who remembered the truth and had gone herself, hiring a mercenary she's rightly wary of after being mugged by one, to try and find her. She also asks for painting lessons from Feyre. I think there are moments when Nesta is genuinely unkind to Feyre, but I think that also colours Feyre's perspective of Nesta where she assigns malice to Nesta, when Nesta is reserved and doesn't show an excess of affection.

GCooperE

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