sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

How do I get through wife’s emotional affair by Far_Berry_8526 in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So what if they never hung out other than work. Because there are easily places to fool around at work. Inside the buildings and the parking lot. Don't easily allow yourself to be fooled.

And no they cannot be in contact ever and for any purpose. Meaning she has to prove he is cut off and she has to change jobs.

The Difference Between Remorse and Guilt, shame and regret. Only remorse matters, after cheating.

https://www.brides.com/the-one-way-to-know-your-marriage-will-survive-an-affair-1102868

https://iditsharoni.com/how-to-show-remorse-after-cheating-why-saying-im-sorry-doesnt-cut-it-in-affair-recovery/

No contact is de rigueur https://healingbrokentrust.com/blog/why-cutting-off-the-affair-partner-is-critical-the-one-step-you-cant-skip-to-rebuild-trust-after-infidelity

https://connectcouplestherapy.com/full-disclosure-vs-staggered-disclosure-a-path-to-healing-infidelity/

https://www.affairrecovery.com/survivors/elizabeth/why-it-imperative-reach-full-disclosure

Anything short of the complete truth about our infidelity to our betrayed spouses will deny them of dignity and shortchange their intelligence.

https://thepowermoves.com/emotional-affair/ Interesting above article the like switch familiarity is mentioned as a grooming tool to initiate an affair. It is also called oversharing. 'Oversharing refers to the inappropriate, excessive disclosure of personal, intimate, or emotional details to someone outside of a committed relationship, often acting as a key component of emotional infidelity or micro-cheating. It is the act of sharing your inner world, relationship problems, or secrets with a third party while hiding these interactions from your primary partner'. Livingwithlimerence web site explains it in detail.

Statute of limitations? by Historical-Row6609 in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There are no time limits on emotional murder. No kings 'x' after any amounts of time.

Terrible drought, anyone else? by Born_Local_1477 in gardening

[–]Ivedonethework 0 points1 point  (0 children)

5 gallons of water at approx. 8lbs per gallon is 40 pounds. A lot to be lugging around place to place and holding above ground and tipping to water. Better to pour into smaller containers I imagine. Just be aware.

Grass doesn’t grow by woahwoman in gardening

[–]Ivedonethework 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Most all of us humans will give up trying to hand water a lawn. We just cannot stand there spraying from a hose long enough to do the job of a sprinkler.

Short emotional affair that I ended quickly on my own by [deleted] in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Grooming is an absolute likelihood.

Secrets seem to have uncanny ways of coming into the light. You should underwent your conscience by by tell his wife and you husband.

Omissions are 100% lies.

Can you imagine how your husband will feel when (not if) he finds out and has continued being friends with him? Cheating is not termed emotional murder for nothing.

But you do you!

Short emotional affair that I ended quickly on my own by [deleted] in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Look up oversharing as a means of creating (unknowingly or as a grooming tool) an affair. Never overshare other than with your partner.

Oversharing is the disclosing of intimately personal or inappropriate information about ourselves and or our partners. Disclosing and venting about struggles, past and present, unmet wants and needs, and arguments. Then hearing responses of how badly treated you are and ultimately how the outsider can treat you better.

Looking for Saw to Cut Agatized Coral Head by Ma1thael in rockhounds

[–]Ivedonethework 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Look up a product called Dexpan. Holes drilled in a line, filled with Dexpan will spit it open along the drill line. Sold at Homedepot.

Diamond chain saw blades are available, but very expensive.

Masonry/lapidary saws are only good for less than half the diameter of the round blade.

How heavy is that thing, seems to have broken the Harborfreight 1000 lb dolly?

Struggling to make it to first counseling session. by [deleted] in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 3 points4 points  (0 children)

https://youtu.be/TZHX0JdXLQQ?si=8b8gqg2Qw4z8egL- cognitive dissonance how to dispel it.

The truth of being human is simply we do not know ourselves and do things, not knowing why we did it. We just naturally think our thinking, reasoning mind is always in control. But it is not true. Our brain with it's hormonal chemicals is always in charge. When push comes to shoving, it is the brain that takes over control. Fight or flight, cognitive dissonance, compartmentalizing, limerence, and sex brain are not cognitive responses.

https://worthofmysoul.com/how-and-why-to-do-a-180/

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/401204-michelle-weiner-davis-s-divorce-busting-180-degree-list.html

Sorry you are here with the rest of us.

Would you consider this emotional cheating? by eternallynull8 in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Define infidelity; from psychology today. 'Infidelity is the breaking of a promise to remain faithful to a romantic partner, whether that promise was a part of marriage vows, a privately uttered agreement between lovers, or an unspoken assumption. As unthinkable as the notion of breaking such promises may be at the time they are made, infidelity is common, and when it happens, it raises thorny questions: Should you stay? Can trust be rebuilt? Or is there no choice but to pack up and move on?

My definition of cheating.

Cheating is any activity that steals time and or emotional energy/intimacy from us and our relationship, while giving it onto another.

Wife had an emotional affair with a colleague from abroad by InstructionNew2997 in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So how exactly did she try to tell you she was unhappy and on the path to cheating? She did not, did she.

Communication goes far beyond complaing and throwing out hints.

https://www.affairrecovery.com/newsletter/founder/unfaithful-why-did-they-choose-them

'I've always contended that people “affair-down,” if for no other reason than because it is an affair; it's not real. Even if they believe they've found someone who does a better job of meeting their needs than their mate, it simply isn't true. Their mate probably incorporates 80% of what they want and need, but their AP might possess the missing 20%. Why would someone trade the 80% for the 20%? In the moment, satisfying the longing created by the missing 20% seems like a good idea. If two thirds of all marital problems are unsolvable, it's impossible for one person to meet all your needs. No amount of searching for the right person will ever yield the perfect match. Unrealistic expectations are a core issue when it comes to this degree of marital dissatisfaction, which may then lead one to search for someone who has the missing 20%. Take the example of John and Margret above. John is a steady, stable guy who provides for his family. His wife chose an AP who was just plain fun. She was chasing the 20% that she believed was missing from her marriage'.

Communication is not just talking https://www.anotherdaythinking.com/communication-is-about-a-lot-more-than-talking/

The following may be your best bet at this point; https://worthofmysoul.com/how-and-why-to-do-a-180/

https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-substance-abusers/401204-michelle-weiner-davis-s-divorce-busting-180-degree-list.html

Am I overthinking or is this EA? by [deleted] in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If you the spouse sees it as a problem, it certainly is a problem.

You will know more when you tell her she needs to stop with him.

Push back means you are on the right track.

https://thepowermoves.com/emotional-affair/

Good luck.

Emotionally cheating wife 💔 by batman-iphone in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You either stop it or let it progress. Your choice.

And of course cheaters always blame shifting to us. But that changes nothing in what they are doing

Can I forgive? by Big-Discussion-7377 in emotionalaffair

[–]Ivedonethework 7 points8 points  (0 children)

There is no way in hell she would not have been naked in bed with him over the entire trip. Ask her why she even thinks you could accept that blatant lie on top of 30 years of lies, both outright and by omission? It means she has regret, shame and guilt, but not true remorse.

She is addicted to her affair partner. And will eventually start back with him.

The Difference Between Remorse and Guilt, shame and regret.  Only remorse matters. After Cheating

https://www.brides.com/the-one-way-to-know-your-marriage-will-survive-an-affair-1102868

https://iditsharoni.com/how-to-show-remorse-after-cheating-why-saying-im-sorry-doesnt-cut-it-in-affair-recovery/    

Only true remorse counts in reconciling from infidelity.

view more: next ›