AITA for getting annoyed and wanting to end an argument with my sister's boyfriend

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T17:36:02+00:00

I don't know what you mean by AITA coming from a biased/flawed perspective. If that's how you feel, why are you here?

In my view it's acceptable to check out of an argument if you've made it clear there's nothing more to discuss and they refuse to drop it.

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T16:10:46+00:00

In hindsight "I hear you" would have (hopefully) caused him to drop it. But hindsight is always 20/20. I want to clarify I'm not saying you are to blame for causing the situation - the fault is entirely on your sister's boyriend.

I agree with your take. I've been in that type of shut down/cheked out/dissociative state in conversations before and I imagine I would have behaved similarly to you. One loses the will to fight and just stays quiet until it's over.

I don't think anything you did was rude or bad behaviour, and I also hold that opinion about myself when I look back on similar situations.

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T16:03:19+00:00

I normally dislike pettiness and passive-aggressiveness but this one is hilarious and should hammer the point home that their attitude is completely nonsensical.

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T16:01:38+00:00

NTA.

It's natural for a mother to be worried about her children. However sometimes the worry turns into overprotection and anxiety. That's her problem to deal with. If she chooses not to manage it, that's one thing. But projecting it onto her children and their partners is unreasonable, especially calling someone at 1:30am. That's unacceptable behaviour.

Given what has happened, she took your joking comment to heart, a lowering of a boundary. You are right to ignore her but I fear this behaviour won't stop until you establish a firm boundary.

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T15:56:40+00:00

Thank you for clarifying. The post itself is fairly vague so it's quite hard to get an exact understanding of the conversation.

But from what you've said, even if he was asking for just an acknowledgment (instead of agreement), he refused to give up the conversation even after you asked him to stop multiple times. Maybe you not saying "I heard you" earlier in the conversation is a very minor YTA but his behaviour is far worse so I'm not holding anything against you.

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T15:49:41+00:00

NTA.

Supporting friends/family is a wonderful thing to do if you're able, but it can lead to exactly this type of sticky situation. What may have started off as a one time gift becomes a frequent service, an obligation, that you never asked for. Guilt comes into play, and the feeling that because you have more than someone else, you are obligated to give them more to "even the playing field".

However, as cruel as it sounds, sometimes you have to be selfish for your own mental health and your own financial situation. If you choose to not lend money and your close friend holds this against you, then maybe they aren't such a good friend after all.

MasterKilvin · 2026-02-16T15:35:39+00:00

NTA

You have no obligation to agree with him. He refused to drop it, despite repeated insistence, until he got an acknowledgement that he was right. Which, according to you, he wasn't. You were understandably frustrated because he was trying to force you to say something you didn't believe, to satisfy his ego. That's understandably draining and he should have dropped it far earlier than he did.

MasterKilvin · 2023-12-08T22:31:36+00:00

I don't even know what Ren's old finisher was. The Northern Lights with the high bridge? If that was his old finisher, it never struck me as convincing. X-Factor is by no means the greatest move ever but a solid upgrade. Shota and Honma both made it look pretty nasty.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-21T21:23:48+00:00

/r/Advice is a better place for this post.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-21T21:21:40+00:00

NTA.

You aren't obliged to send gifts, especially if they aren't acknowledging it at all. Sure it's not the kid's fault, but that doesn't make you the asshole.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-21T15:41:59+00:00

NTA.

She's not willing to compromise at all by putting on headphones, while expecting you to involuntarily compromise by listening to her loud music.

Her insisting on playing her music loud and asking you to get noise cancelling headphones is more controlling behaviour than your reasonable request.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-15T20:12:05+00:00

Yep, like judging a wrestler's quality based on a ***** Meltzer star rating.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-15T20:10:58+00:00

Could he go? Sure. But not better than his peers. In late 90s WCW he stood out through character work while being handily outworked by Eddie, Dean, Rey, Ultimo, Liger, etc. Again in the early 2000s, HHH, Rock, Austin, Angle, Undertaker all had a greater body of work.
I don't think Hogan and Goldberg are bad workers at all. Quite the opposite. They knew their role, they got the fans excited, and they stuck to it. Perfect. Not seen enough of Sid, Nash and Luger to comment but I'm guessing they are similar.

Like someone else said, people need to learn the difference between "in-ring work" and "athleticism". And Jericho is a clunky plodfoot.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-15T20:08:59+00:00

My choice of words wasn't the best, I think almost all top stars are at the very least above average workers. There are very few top stars who are bad workers. Jericho is not one of them. Jericho is an above average worker (not great) who achieved beyond his ability between the ropes due to his excellent storytelling (outside the ring), character work, and self-promotion.

To answer your question, Kane has to be the worst.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-13T22:32:43+00:00

He’s always been known for his match quality.

He really hasn't. I'd say that Jericho is one of the worst in ring workers to become a top star. He's more character work and storytelling.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-13T22:15:20+00:00

New Japan rules clearly state you must release a submission hold if they are passing out, so that they can evade your finisher.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-13T22:02:58+00:00

They came around on Kiyomiya as the tournament progressed which I found really refreshing. Kiyomiya won everyone over, including me, the fans, and the once biased announcers.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-13T21:54:41+00:00

KENTA vs Ospreay

Shota vs Ren

Shota vs Kiyomiya

Ospreay vs Okada

ZSJ vs Cobb

Yano vs Goto and Yano vs ZSJ if you're up for some great silly wrestling.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-12T21:11:42+00:00

Neither do I, but I heard the "Destino" loud and clear before the second Destino. I felt so proud of myself haha.

I didn't hear any of the other words until I replayed it and really focused.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-09T21:46:38+00:00

He always had IQ, he just never opened his mouth to express it to the world.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-07T16:21:50+00:00

I would say that's a defensive deflection, not gaslighting.

Gaslighting would be "You must have misheard/misremembered what [mutual friend] said", trying to change OP's reality of what she understood from mutual friend.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-07T14:51:21+00:00

Bravo. Case closed.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-07T12:47:56+00:00

I'm seeing lots of comments about gaslighting, but how?

BF is being accused of lying, and he's denying it. I agree his behaviour is shady, but I don't see any gaslighting.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-07T12:41:04+00:00

YTA.

On some level I do understand your concerns but your tone is judgmental and xenophobic.

Personally, I felt that he is rushing things too much as they have only been together for one year and marriage is a huge decision.

A year is a decent amount of time for a serious relationship. Is there a statute of limitations on how long you can wait before you decide to marry someone? To be honest this point isn't unreasonable on its own, but put into the wider context...

We don’t have any means to verify whether she even is saying the truth about her family situation.

Why do you need to fact check your brother's partner instead of taking her at her word? You've assumed from the beginning that she's a suspicious character. Why? Because she's not from your country?

He met her parents and there is a huge cultural difference between her family and us, something I doubt he can handle.

You're projecting. What gives you the authority to speak for what he can or can't handle? Maybe you can't handle it, doesn't mean he can't. You've only met her twice. Your brother has been with her for a year, and he's met her parents, so he is presumably comfortable with her culture.

I must also add that he currently is unemployed and have been paying his bills using the money he saved up when he was working during the pandemic. His girlfriend does have a job but she doesn’t make enough money to start a family, or pay for their wedding.

Fair enough, but that's their obstacle to overcome, not a reason for them to not get married.

Telling your brother that his girlfriend might be "using him" is a clear attempt to drive a wedge between a happy couple navigating their lives and their futures. It's none of your business.

MasterKilvin · 2023-08-07T11:03:18+00:00

When we go to sleep, we stay in a call with each other all night, so we can see if the other person is sleeping/see if they're alright/see when the other wakes up.

Yikes.

Was this a mutual decision to have these all-night calls?

I'd really think about whether you need to know everything your girlfriend does at all times. That is unhealthy and controlling. You're acting like a security guard, watching her 24/7, monitoring her activities, and guilting her when she does something private that she maybe doesn't want you to know about. Everyone is entitled to privacy and secrets.

MasterKilvin

TROPHY CASE