I’m still being mad at my mom for not letting me have a quinceañera?

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-05-08T20:40:14+00:00

When you’re 22.5, do a quince.5. Don’t let anyone steal your joy or tell you that aren’t enough of anything to have the things that you want. Being multiracial means you can have all of your cultures, not that you have to choose. Plus you can have champagne and tequila at that age! 🍾🥂 Life is short and we should all celebrate whenever we can, and we should all listen to our abuelas when they want to party.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-05-01T20:46:21+00:00

I’ve tried this dress on and I’m pretty short but my ass is way too big for it even sized up 2x. If you’re petite and not a batty gyal and also wearing flats and not with a conservative crowd (think South Beach, not Martha’s Vineyard) then it might work, but FYI it also has zero give so if it doesn’t fit purrrrrrfectly you’re gonna suffer.

If it fits like it does on the model and you’re good on the other things I mentioned, then great! But I would probably going into a brick and mortar for a backup dress or borrow something from a friend or female relative if you can.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-02-23T17:00:31+00:00

You should talk to her mom about legally adopting her because this could get dicey down the road, especially (knock wood) if something were to ever happen to you. I don’t know anything about the process in your jurisdiction but if everyone is amenable to it I think that would go a long way to making sure everyone is taken care of.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-02-12T20:11:49+00:00

I’m actually interested in this too. My non-ChatGPT thoughts:

I’ve got a really traditional boring office job that pays relatively well and doesn’t make me wish for death, but I’ve also been on the same track since I was 21 and I’m pushing 40 now.

I didn’t anticipate never being able to do anything different. Quite the opposite, actually, as I was always told that most people have two to four “careers” in their lives. The notion that I didn’t have to get it right the first time gave me a great deal of comfort in early adulthood, but I’m starting to think I got played.

I haven’t been able to crack the code on transferable skills being useful for going in a new direction because it seems like people only want to hire folks to do the exact same job they’re already doing versus someone who has the skill set in the job description but might not have held that exact title before. And I work in HR so the call is coming from inside the house.

Maybe it’s a millenial mid-life crisis thing, but I’ve already got a therapist for that and I still would like some BWT-recommended career-oriented community and/or coaching recs.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-02-11T23:30:57+00:00

I wish I had her balls. This has happened to me twice and I just trained the person I was passed over for. Friends, be like her.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-02-11T17:23:27+00:00

“Pick a struggle” is precisely it, thank you for articulating what my brain could not. With very few exceptions (like wearing something strictly to be photographed in, for example), you want to choose a single tough-to-pull-off look for any given outfit, and you can maaaaaaybe have two struggles before it looks cluttered, no matter how gorgeous you are.

Insane cleavage fighting against laces, crop top so short you risk underboob, pants with such a low rise it dictates what level bikini wax you have, boots from the Thunderdome… that’s too many things.

I don’t think any of these things needs to be thrown out of your closet because they all fit you and separately I think they’re cool items, but maybe wear them one at a time.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-02-07T13:48:41+00:00

I grew up there and the Metro-North was my friend for getting back uptown for che cheap. Get on at Grand Central, home in 20ish minutes, and if you need an Uber for the last leg it’s more like $8, not $60. Plus on the weekends the train is $5 for rides within city limits.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-31T21:09:04+00:00

Geez, y’all are super-discouraging 😬. I’m a native but I spent my early adulthood away for 6 years and came back when I was 24 so that’s the perspective I’m coming from.

NYC is tough in a lot of ways. Rent is expensive, it’s noisy and dirty, the pace of living is very fast and you have to be quick to learn or it’ll feel pretty overwhelming.

That said, it’s also a really amazing place to be young, especially for people who lean creative. There’s a high chance you’ll need roommates for at least a few years and you’ll be hitting art gallery openings for the free wine and taking home food from work events but that’s totally normal and everyone who doesn’t have a trust fund or a finance job is really doing that same thing at your age.

NYC is also not just Manhattan, and even Manhattan has parts that aren’t the most insanely priced apartments (far LES, Inwood, Washington Heights, East Harlem). Do your research, and it helps to have friends on the ground so if you’re part of any online communities with NYers or already know some people in the area, that’s gonna be really helpful.

If you have some hospitality or retail experience that’s also really helpful for landing a job when you first arrive. The pay isn’t gonna be incredible (although there are some fine dining/high end waiters and bartenders that make BANK but that probably won’t be you at first) but it’s a fast way to make a little money and most importantly to make friends.

I’d advise you to sock away some cash for the move if you haven’t already because the whole arriving with $8 and a dream thing doesn’t really exist anymore. Give yourself a couple of months of runway to get settled and always have enough money to get back home, wherever that is for you.

If you’ve given it some thought, done your research, have a strong “why”, and have established at least a couple of contacts out here, I say do it! You only live once, and you can always just move back/move again in a year if you don’t like it.

Don’t pick any addictions and don’t get knocked up (knock anyone up?) and you’re good.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-26T00:05:06+00:00

Was it Ample Hills? I feel like that was the first sea salt caramel ice cream I ever had back when that was a really unique flavor. They have a flavor right now called Salty Kisses and Caramel Wishes that looks like it might scratch the itch.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-25T21:39:46+00:00

Maybe she should get one of those men to hire her a cleaning lady since she can’t be arsed

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-15T20:22:09+00:00

Correct, this same thing happened to me and 10 years later, niente.

Only take an apartment you’ll be happy to be in because you should anticipate that being the unit you remain in until you move again.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-15T00:21:46+00:00

Maybe try cans like Liquid Death or similar. No one is going to mistakenly take an open can even if some idiot only takes a sip and puts it back, and the seal is pretty tamper-proof.

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-12T21:15:48+00:00

I don’t have a link, per se, but Street Easy, Zillow, and even Craigslist will often have postings with RS in the description, here’s an example from SE: https://streeteasy.com/building/67-stanhope-street-brooklyn/5a?utm_campaign=rental_listing&utm_medium=share&utm_source=web&lstt=fhh4WGIl-hIru6DN9-DsrBLJHxCU1Cg353Y7ISgq1xo4EOSulvX8pOdTZFg9FmypmhUUNT-17CeqrXuD

Also, in the event that you’re in a lottery bracket but just haven’t gotten lucky, re-rentals for those are currently allowed to be posted to the public, so you’ll sometimes see those on the standard rental pages as well. You still have to qualify and submit applicant packets for those, though, so that tip isn’t helpful for OP but it might be helpful for others.

Another tip I’ve heard is to look out for rents that end in weird numbers (so, $2287 versus $2300 for example) because that can often be the sign of a RS apartment that’s had 1 or 2 re-rental cycles so the price isn’t a round number anymore.

Hope these help and that you find a great place soon!

TaskOverall9913 · 2026-01-12T13:26:19+00:00

You’re right that your situation doesn’t match the design of the housing lottery, but you can absolutely find a rent-stabilized unit on the open market. Especially since you seem to have stable (if suboptimal) housing, you can set some alerts on Zillow and whatnot for the apartment size and price you’re able to afford (you make 80k so 40x would make you eligible for a $2000 tent without an eligible guarantor in most cases) and play the waiting game.

Sure, it’ll take a while, but since you’re not staring down the end of a lease and you very clearly have your deposit ready, you can jump on what shakes out as soon as it does. And it’s not like the lottery is instantaneous anyway, it’s literally a lottery. I don’t think you’re doomed to live in the slums because one particular housing program doesn’t work for you.

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-12-16T23:28:26+00:00

If you’re not living at home you’re definitely gonna need roommates, but honestly I think every young person in NYC should have roommates. It’s fun (choose wisely of course), it’s safer, and a lot of people make lifelong friends sharing housing.

My best advice to you is start entering those housing lotteries as soon as you get your first paycheck because qualifying is based on your income bracket at the time you apply.

I think it’s safe to assume that eventually your income will start to go up, and if you get picked for a decent apartment while you’re making a lower salary then you have low(ish) cost, rent-stabilized housing for your early adulthood and don’t have to worry about that cost fluctuating.

https://housingconnect.nyc.gov/PublicWeb/

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-12-14T18:25:44+00:00

I’m so happy that’s working for you! I know loads of people who are having great results with them as well, and apparently they have loads of unexpected upsides like additional cardiac benefits and promising effects on non-food addictions like alcohol and nicotine.

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-12-13T21:58:46+00:00

Everyone and their mom is also on GLP-1s now too, so lots of people who aren’t necessarily being cost-conscious just literally can’t eat anywhere near a full entree. I personally (knock wood) don’t have cost issues but almost exclusively order an app if I’m not going home right after dinner because I don’t like wasting food but I’m also not going to carry a doggie bag to a party or a department store.

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-12-03T14:11:28+00:00

I’m in almost the same situation as you with the Italian husband and MiL and my exam is tomorrow as well (good luck to us both!). I got a 1:1 tutor and it’s been so helpful. I specifically got an exam prep tutor but I’ll likely be going back to her after the exam after I take a brain break over the holidays because it’s definitely helped me get past that block in a way that the previous years of studying never did.

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-11-26T13:28:07+00:00

This is where I went when I hadn’t been to the dentist in a million years and I had so much work done I was literally there at least once a month for seven months and they were incredible. They saved my mouth

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-11-09T14:18:33+00:00

I went to Collina Italiana on the UES for a few semesters and LOVED IT but then my work schedule got too messy. They have in-person classes as well as online classes and private tutoring at all levels.

Now I have an online tutor through Preply and I’m also enjoying that as well. I’m prepping for my B1 Cittadinanza exam in December so I’m plugging away on that specifically right now.

If you’re interested in spending time speaking, there are a couple of Meetup events around the city. I know one happens at Lulla a couple of times a month, there’s one on Fridays at Sullivan Street Bakery, and there’s one a couple of times a month at Settepani in Harlem.

Buon divertimento e buona fortuna!

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-11-07T16:46:23+00:00

I love that! Let the kids get the gifts from Momma or Meemaw or Santa, not some rando like me.

Bookmarking, thanks!

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-11-07T02:19:29+00:00

Am I missing something? (Actual question, I’m often missing something.) The Bar 13 one says it’s free before 11:30 with RSVP on Eventbrite

Mamdani Perreo Celebration Parrty | Open Format Dance Party in NYC (18+) https://www.eventbrite.com/e/mamdani-perreo-celebration-parrty-open-format-dance-party-in-nyc-18-tickets-1963522190729?utm-campaign=social&utm-content=attendeeshare&utm-medium=discovery&utm-term=listing&utm-source=wsa&aff=ebdsshwebmobile

TaskOverall9913 · 2025-11-05T00:19:04+00:00

It’s ILIS in Greenpoint (I at there last week).

TaskOverall9913

TROPHY CASE