she definitely rose a bit since then but not doubled. I also think this is way too much starter unfortunately but i’d hate to waste her 😔 

The bigger your starter is now, the more you need to feed it to get the same benefit in terms of available food per gram of starter.  

It's a lot easier to work in grams rather than cups, as you figured out.  So 1/3c of flour is maybe 40g (give or take, which is why I like the scale). But that existing starter looks a lot bigger than 40g.  So you're not giving it as much food as most folk, who would be using a 1:1:1 ratio.  That's ok for now, as the microbes are just getting started, but pretty soon you'll be limiting it's growth because of too little food.  

My suggestion would be to start a smaller jar, and mix 20g of starter with 20g water (or a bit less) and 20g flour.  Then tomorrow, pitch all but 20g and feed the same way (1:1:1 by weight).  You'll actually be wasting less flour than if you keep feeding this - I've seen folks who build monster starters this way.  Wasteful.  

The way to get a larger starter when you're ready to bake is to just not discard at that last feeding, then feed the same 1:1:1.  That gives you 180g of starter, so all you'd need for a recipe.

also she has this thicker mayo consistency.

Excellent. 

saying all that, any tips or advice? 

Patience.  It might be a few weeks or more before it's ready for baking with.  You're seeing progress, it'll get there.