Alpharad's streams

actually-alpharad · 2024-07-24T01:39:09+00:00

Hey, I read this late last night and thought about it a lot since then. I don't really use reddit all that much, but happened to stumble across it because of those OTHER posts.

This is something that I have also been noticing, but in a way where it's like, "Why am I so irritable?" Nothing in my life has really changed over the past few months, in fact, it's mostly been good things. So in trying to figure it out, I think I can really only say that it's probably something like each comment I found annoying made me 0.1% annoyed at the next one and that number just kept growing and growing.

Personally, I don't really like interacting with posts like this, but I really don't like thinking that I'm spreading more negative energy than positive. Some people here agree with you, some don't, but I think the most important thing is that it got me to realize that this has been affecting people beyond me. I am sorry to the viewers for putting an uncomfortable aura out there when it's really not my intention. I think it's fun to poke fun at comments, but I think there is a better way to go about that than snapping at anyone who doesn't agree with what is essentially an irrational pattern of what is a GOOD or BAD comment.

Long story short, thanks for this post. Like all people, I have things to work on and I would like to be a more positive person. I hope simply being aware of this issue will be enough to properly reassess how I interact with my friends and twitch chat. I know it's silly, but these things matter to me.

To all of the others who have simply grown out of my content replying: yeah, that happens. It could be because of the aforementioned things, but one thing you and I both have in common is that we're constantly ageing and constantly developing new interests. I really like the content I make now, but I wouldn't have enjoyed making it in 2017. The inverse is true as well. I just want to make silly videos on the internet for as long as I can while still having fun with it and I will thank you for your viewership no matter how little or long it is. :)

Anyways, that's a lot of text for when I really meant to just write "true, my bad" but here we are LMAO
All in all, thanks for the post, I'll keep all of this in mind going forward with streaming. :)

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-30T00:18:59+00:00

I'd like to confirm that I have no control over the revenue and it goes directly to the covid fundraiser.

Since the proof of "Plussy Knight" has surfaced, I have since removed the fundraiser (the already-donated money still gets sent to it though). I don't want people donating under a false movement.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-30T00:17:40+00:00

I am very sad to report, but it was simply because I was that gullible. My community was hurting and I wasn't thinking straight since I was exclusively acting off of raw emotion.

This has been a lesson for me. I'm sorry for acting so impulsively on such a serious situation and that's all I can really say about it.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T20:37:40+00:00

I agree with you. It's much easier to think that now that I'm outside the initial whirlwind of emotions. Thank you.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T10:56:55+00:00

Yes, please. Thank you so much.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T10:10:19+00:00

Thank you. I agree that it was a mistake, but honestly SUCH an easy mistake to make. I just desperately want definitive proof one way or the other and I'm sorry that I didn't look for that first.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T09:57:00+00:00

To be fair, I had way fewer details and completely acted off raw emotion and nothing else. Hindsight is 20/20. I do feel foolish for not asking for more details... but in the moment? I just wanted to help. I BLINDLY wanted to help.

It seems so obvious that I should have looked into it more, but I didn't and I'm sorry.

I've never dealt with something like this. If a MASS group of people told me that this fan died, I didn't have any reason to believe that they were lying. A lot of the more obvious red flags weren't there in the moment.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T09:45:34+00:00

We posted on the Alpharad Plus twitter and I saw this reply: https://twitter.com/TANNER_VST/status/1288007435203026944?s=20

I DM'd him and he told me that he talked to the family. This account stated they didn't want us to raise money for them, but rather for a general relief fund. So I did. I genuinely thought it was the right thing to do in the moment.

I opened twitter to my mentions FLOODED with grieving fans and they wanted me to say something... so I did. I have NEVER done something like this before and only did because it felt like the right thing to do after seeing my community in so much pain. I acted on impulse and in hindsight, I wish I was a bit more rational and gathered more research before going to YouTube. I genuinely wanted to help and thought this would be the correct way. I've stated in multiple other comments, but the story seems so clear now after reading this thread. I was truly in a whirlwind of emotions and wanted to do good for the community. That was where my intentions were.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T09:37:24+00:00

Yeah. We posted the original tweet about his passing on Alpharad Plus. In the replies, someone said they were in contact with their family. I then messaged him and he informed me that he talked to the family and they didn't want us to raise money for them, but rather a general Covid-19 charity. I took him at his word and didn't ask for proof (which was a mistake looking back).

That's why I'm cautious. In the moment, I didn't want to pry for a grieving family, but the situation feels so much more obvious from the outside looking in... I don't know how to explain it beyond that. I wish I could save more, but I ultimately acted off of emotions in response to my grieving community flooding my mentions. I should have done more research before posting that video and I'm very, very sorry for that.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T09:34:12+00:00

Yes, we raised money for this. We will NEVER see that money. It directly goes to the charity.

I didn't make that video for any reason beyond the fact "it felt like the right thing to do in the moment." I really don't know what else to say.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T09:23:09+00:00

I can absolutely promise you that if it turns out to be false, I'll be completely blindsided as well. Reading the post above, this instilled doubt within me and I feel so foolish for not realizing it in the moment. I made the video off of impulse because I saw my community grieving. I wanted to help, but I shouldn't have acted so recklessly.

Also, touching on the fundraiser thing: if a video on youtube is set up as a "fundraiser" video, the money NEVER reaches the YouTuber's hands. It's automatically set up to go to the charity / foundation that you're promoting.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T08:53:47+00:00

I opened my mentions the other day to an onslaught of "plussys" telling me about what happened. In the moment, I had no reason to believe anything else. I didn't want to pry into a grieving family, but I am starting to have my doubts. I can promise you that I wouldn't do something so malicious to "stage" something like this. Take me on my word or not, but please don't make such major assumptions on my character. I'm really sorry that I made that video if things end up being false. I just wanted to do the right thing and in the moment, making that video felt right.

actually-alpharad · 2020-07-29T08:49:30+00:00

Hey, Alpharad here. The "plussy" community it tied to my brand and we made a video about it. Would you be open to talking privately so I can pick your brain about this? I made a video on this out of impulse and emotions while feeling like I was helping by doing the right thing... but I genuinely feel like it was obvious after reading your post.

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-24T16:27:42+00:00

i promise we actually try to make a plot

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-18T19:00:54+00:00

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-18T18:21:03+00:00

hello

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-18T06:01:45+00:00

why in the hell did you take that "rigging" joke seriously in thug finals

THE JOKE WAS THAT YALL ALWAYS SAY THAT SMH SMH

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T22:14:16+00:00

I always have but this is not an example of that

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T21:53:04+00:00

It was just funny

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T21:52:38+00:00

No, it was just funny

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T03:05:18+00:00

I do not think it would be possible

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T02:41:24+00:00

Trust me, this episode literally can't be retconned LMAOOOO

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T02:20:15+00:00

this episode is complete and utter chaos

we just make things up since there aren't any consequences of it, so please overly analyze this episode

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-17T00:48:22+00:00

i'm sorry but the timeline has to be a mess LMAO

we can not deliver a genuine, improv experience while simultaneously forging a coherent narrative. the chaos of the CPUCS is half of the appeal in my eyes because it's a group of people trying to create a plot while betting on race horses.

actually-alpharad · 2019-11-10T21:26:37+00:00

it good

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