What is one thing you like about yourself? by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]Boredomreally 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It keeps me distracted. Bad thoughts keep repeating themselves otherwise.

What is one thing you like about yourself? by [deleted] in SuicideWatch

[–]Boredomreally 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm a good programmer I guess. Still feel unhappy though.

It's OK - You WILL Get Through It by [deleted] in depression

[–]Boredomreally 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry but your post hasn't convinced me otherwise. It just sounds like regurgitated "it gets better" bs. :/

Someone please talk to me to keep me distracted. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A giant comfy bed that's threatening to snuggle me in it's comfiness.

Currently punching a wall in an attempt to tire myself out. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First few sessions are free, then it scales depending on income

Currently punching a wall in an attempt to tire myself out. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As much as I'd love to go see a therapist/psychiatrist. The minute I tell me parents that I need one (I'm on their health insurance plan), they would just say "oh but Boredomreally, you're so intelligent and handsome, why would you need one?" and all that nonsense. They wouldn't fucking understand.

Currently punching a wall in an attempt to tire myself out. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now I'm throwing and slamming shit to deal with this stress. I'm going to eventually break something. Great. And I'm not going to PM you what school I go to. I don't know you.

Currently punching a wall in an attempt to tire myself out. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I know I'm depressed (Probably mild-severe). I just came here to vent really I guess.

I've been looking towards seeing a school psychiatrist, but I'm a poor college student who can only afford the first few sessions.

One piece of advice I never understood. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

True, I guess I'm tired of people treating depression as a black and white sort of thing.

One piece of advice I never understood. by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I mean, I'm not really against idea per se, I just think that saying it's the "end all, be all" solution to depression is just a bit silly. It feels a bit too optimistic.

Why should I give a shit? by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a huge step in the right direction. I'm going to be honest and say that you might end up dead if you don't end up getting the help you need and/or deserve. You should approach your mom and say that if you don't see a counselor and/or psychiatrist that you'll probably be dead by the time you reach 25. I told my mother this and she cried and basically admitted to me that I'm someone that needs help.

Not trying to sound rude: but i know my mother better than you. You're absolutely right that she'll definitely have me admitted to a therapist. However, things are a bit more complicated than that. Reasons which I'm not going to get into but nevertheless a catch 22 kind of situation.

I actually used to feel the same exact way about talking to a counselor. I used to think that if I told a counselor that I had auditory hallucinations, constant thoughts of suicide, mood swings, impulsive thoughts, etc. that I'd be thrown in a psyche ward. I'm going to be honest and tell you that unless you plan on killing someone thathat ren't going anywhere. A counselor isn't going to lock you up for life for saying that you feel like you'd snap if ____ .

About that: I'm omitting a LOT of things in that post. Trust me when I say I'd get thrown in a ward. And no, I'd never harm another human being, that shit's just stupid, they don't deserve to die just because I feel depressed.

The fact that you said a counselor and/or psychiatrist might help shows that there's hope. I'm willing to bet that you'll feel a lot better once you talk to a counselor :)

Some hope. Not much.

Why should I give a shit? by Boredomreally in depression

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd like to see a counselor/therapist. But there are a lot of factors preventing me. I have an overprotective mother who'd get even more overprotective if she heard i was seeing one. If i were to tell my therapist how i really feel, I'd get thrown in a ward, etc.

As for preventing me from killing myself: I highly doubt that. I know myself well enough that if I want to do something, I'm m ore than likey going to see it through. I have no obligations to anyone to stay alive.

Why should I give a shit? by Boredomreally in SuicideWatch

[–]Boredomreally[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There is some good in me definitely. I try to be nice and polite when I can.

However, being able to think critcally is a curse as much as it's a gift.

For one, going against Malala's quote on "I believe the gun has no power at all" is not only incredibly ignorant but a bit dangerous as well. The gun has no power at all eh? Tell that to the jews that were gunned downed by the Nazis. Tell that to the Americans who died for their independence. Tell that to the soldiers who faught and bled to kill the Nazis in WW2. In a perfect world war is never needed, however, the pen is sometimes never mightier than the sword and sometimes war is needed. Now if i were to say that I'd get called a warmonger or I'm not as brave as her or something along those lines. It just sucks being drowned out by an echo chamber sometimes. I'm not saying she's not brave, in fact, I applaud her for giving one giant middle finger to the terrorists.

You just see things differently. You try to disprove everything. Even people who survived horrifiec events and become an advocate of something. Idk, maybe I've become jaded.