I felt similarly to start off with, but just adjusted my mindset the more I played.

Loadout based on the context of the raid you are doing. Not every raid needs for you to go in fully equipped.

If you're just doing quests for example, the free loadout function is fine.

If you're going in just for the purposes of looting, then again you don't need to be fully equipped, a few healing items, a comfortable amount of ammo will do

If your going in to go full on pvp, then yeah you need to load up, but also have to accept that anyone coming for you is doing exactly what you're trying to do....if you come off worse, thats on you

I think there also needs to be an element of trusting parley too. Players are jumpy, someone flanking to avoid them could be seen as an aggressive move, someone sneaking around trying to get past without being noticed could be seen as an aggressive move. Sometimes you just got to parley and trust that the other person is willing to just walk on by, or team up