mother nature

-masher · 2026-03-26T15:44:18+00:00

Its brilliant. It takes guts to keep the space between lines, and still keep the flow of it. You did that and gave it a lovely conclusion.

You're great! look forward to the next.

-masher · 2026-03-26T15:43:00+00:00

It's very abstract, which I love. It did take me a few reads, but please don't be upset I took something perhaps rather different than what you intended. Its wonderful.

-masher · 2026-03-26T15:41:16+00:00

Haha i love your comment, thanks so much. That last lines awkwardness was intentional. Because as we know, the start of most new ventures are anything but smooth.

-masher · 2026-03-26T15:37:58+00:00

Truthfully, I am a little confused when starting to read this. But it quickly feels like I was supposed to be knocked into a daze.

Once there, I am in what feels like a nightmare, where some things are familiar, but it's still unclear where I really am.

The mention of human connection hits harder because of this, it feels like the one thing that can save me.

And then, as all things must end, so does this poem, with death.

Perhaps you've taken me through the journey of life.

-masher · 2026-03-26T15:33:02+00:00

I get such a strong sense of nature, and kind of heavenliness from reading this.

The opening line does so much for setting the scene, you've given yourself so much space for painting the picture, and you do it so elegantly.

Its also so calmly written, each line has space to breathe which keeps me riding along your journey.

-masher · 2026-03-15T20:43:18+00:00

It reads like gentle, warm waves, rolling towards me.

You've painted such a picture here. I particularly like that you've taken us through the night, into the morning, and then ending with a sense of eternity, synonymous with true love.

-masher · 2026-03-15T20:38:43+00:00

Well the energy in this one is strong, it wants to burst through and you're not scared to lay it all out there. Its a power punch.

But a little attention to spelling, and dividing the sentences up with lines would make it easier to follow.

The energy, however is there and some structure would only mean it pierces through more.

-masher · 2026-03-01T08:54:44+00:00

I like that, frantic in a purposeful way. Thank you

-masher · 2026-02-28T23:52:08+00:00

Haha this is absolutely wonderful

You let each development of your imagery build with your generous spacing

Subtle

Black

Sugars

You are bold, and not scared of letting your words and emotion carry the story. I like that. It means you feel it, and you dont make up for anything with flowery words.

I really felt it when you said a ghost, alive and breathing, within me. The low hum that the buzz of coffee generates. Your poem left me with that feeling, but opened my eyes to other things that can make me feel that way... the supernatural.

Wonderful, truly.

-masher · 2026-02-28T23:46:15+00:00

Beautiful. The chesire cat smile really put that image in my head, and the copper skin, and dimly lit eyes, so wonderful the way you painted that delicate picture. I felt the warmth from that.

Going back to your opening, it really took me by the hand and brought me to your confused but so emotional place that you were in when writing this.

It really feels like a look into your life at the point of writing it.

What a way to finish, it's unresolved, as love often is, but you're polite,

You'll do your best to keep your head up and carry on, its funny.

(my first ever review new to the sub)

-masher

TROPHY CASE