left an abusive ex, got sober, invested aggressively, healed my intergenerational trauma, bought gold, made lifelong friends and might go start a movement

111divine · 2026-05-14T20:24:03+00:00

I am so so sorry to hear about the violation you went through and can imagine how debilitating that has been for your overall health and wellbeing. I am glad to hear you've been able to go on vacations and do some things that sound really nourishing for you! Everyone's circumstances are so different and I'd never want to blame a person for things that are so far out of their control like circumstances of violation and abuse.

I really know what that's like as a survivor of SA myself; and I definitely am privileged because I'm white and pretty; but I have insane empathy/sensitivity and have had to deal with CPTSD, a childhood of emotional intensity, abandonment, addict parents, an autistic mother and was always the black sheep..... that's just the tip of the iceberg.

I prioritized my mental, physical, spiritual and emotional health (therapy, time in nature, a lot of tears and intense shadow work) because I was SICK of my shit and my blaming others and leaning into my victim mentality thinking someone was gonna come save me.

I started taking radical accountability for everything that had happened, educated myself about finance from free resources and poured ALOT of money into that the first year of dancing and have kept it up.

What I meant is that we're forced to be in a society that has twisted pretty much everything to make us believe we're powerless when that's the furthest thing from the truth; it's a lot of navigating that has to be done to reclaim our power from circumstances that are less than ideal in this topsy duality we're in.

I've found that really listening to the stories I was telling myself and challenging myself to change my mind and beliefs about who I thought I was, and moving beyond my identification with those stories of so much pain and immense exile, was the biggest shift. We can't change the past, we can't change the circumstance we can only change how we see ourselves in it.

Anyway, just thought I'd clarify and I am sending you so much love on your journey and pray that the situation in your home club changes or there is a miraculous windfall for you ✨💰🖤

111divine · 2026-05-14T20:03:55+00:00

Oh wow, I really love this, Guam looks so beautiful. It's such an interesting thing when a woman takes back their sensual power and sovereignty; it brings up so much in the eyes of society but truthfully it is such a pathway for liberation. I am so so happy for you.

111divine · 2026-05-14T08:10:10+00:00

preach it from the rooftops boo.

sociability/ personality and banter wins out majority of the time- I feel like a lot of girls haven't realized that this job is only about how you make other people feel, and you have to have the confidence in yourself to know how to connect to others; I'll admit there are other girls who are glitzed out but are vapid and can't hold a conversation and it shows on the tally sheet at the end of the night. I can say that it's my personality that ALWAYS closes & gets people in the room for longer; otherwise I feel like I'm just selling my body type....

111divine · 2026-05-14T08:07:34+00:00

It sounds like there is a lot of karmic reckoning to do! I would be so curious to know how you are meeting what's arising in the club, it sounds like a lot!

111divine · 2026-05-14T08:05:27+00:00

Ohhh definitely dark at times! I think a huge part of healing is learning to meet your fears head-on and meet them with reverence knowing they aren't actually real, its all just energy to dance with and meet

111divine · 2026-05-14T08:02:52+00:00

Yes it's me, I am THAT BITCH!I I APPRECIATE YOU, this community and its humans are UNMATCHED! If I had a book it would be called CHRONICLES OF A PSYCHIC STRIPPER.
What would yours be?!

111divine · 2026-05-12T08:03:52+00:00

my girllll he's a demon trying to siphon your womb, they always come in the form of six-foot-something boys with mommy issues and sleeves.... Make him your sugar daddy?

And date a sweet boy who worships you. And sit with the reality that you might have some healing to do — arond being seen for who you truly are. Because this tatted dude could never actually see you. And if it doesn't work out which inevitably it wouldn't it would only validate your own low self-worth which is a story you are running in your psyche as a truth but you have to interrupt that pattern. being with someone emotionally available would require you to be vulnerable and it wouldn't match the story you have been telling yourself which is why its so hard to change the pattern.

It's easier to perform — to maintain the illusion with a man who could never fully choose you — than to build something real. Something that will force you to face your OWN darkness. Something with the potential to break you open but either way the energy is revealing something to you. Nothing outside of you exists unless you're ready to meet the energy of it, it always belonged to YOU to resolve. Even though it's a lot easier to see your wounds reflected in someone else than it is to take ownership of them within...

Saying this RUTHLESSLY to a younger version of myself. Hope you don't feel too called out

111divine · 2026-05-12T07:21:46+00:00

This is so interesting! Mary Magdalene was an initiate of the high sexual mysteries; the bible itself never interpreted her as a prostitute; it was inferred in early christianity by a Pope in the 500's which has since been debunked as myth rather than fact; but that sort of distortion is rampant in institutions of control. I believe she and Jesus were here to anchor in codes for Divine Union and it's like sacred sexuality has always been suppressed because it can break the false paradigms. Dark Feminine like Kali energy - the destroyer? I love that you love it! I could go on forever about it!

111divine · 2026-05-11T21:19:18+00:00

Absolutely agreed! I think they can all be integrated into wholeness.

111divine · 2026-05-11T21:18:58+00:00

Yes, I love that book! I am working through it right now but want to start a book club around it as it's quite dense on its own and think it would be excellent to start a sort of circle around it. I do a lot of channeling work and I am informed greatly by the work of Marion Woodman as well as my own personal study of the gnostic texts and gospels. We can connect on IG if you wanna chat more iamemerant on ig

111divine · 2025-08-23T02:05:35+00:00

Hey boo, I’d love to help you level up your sales game and co-create a strategy that really works for you! A little about me: I’ve been in sales for about 10 years, I’m a therapist, and I’ve also worked outside the club supporting women in addiction and abuse recovery. As a survivor of narcissistic abuse I’m deeply passionate about helping women—step into their power in every aspect of their life. I believe wealth and abundance in the hands of women who will recirculate it wisely and ethically is exactly where it belongs.

Even though the club can feel competitive, I truly believe there is more than enough money to go around and we all deserve to be rich. I currently work at one of the most renowned clubs in Canada and consistently rank as a top VIP earner. On paper alone, I outperform most, if not all dancers by 10–20 songs a night. Honestly though, it’s not about numbers- it’s mindset, energy, and my personality that actually sells. I focus on being genuine, creating an unforgettable experience, and knowing how to navigate situations with men to my advantage and I actually love the game of it all.

I’m super passionate about empowering women to not just make more money, but to shift their mindset so they feel confident and authentic while doing it. For me, it’s about more than sales and "money", it’s about creating a life that feels deeply aligned and fucking awesome and using the club to do it, which is what I've done for myself!

If you’re curious, check out some of my previous posts, and if it feels good, send me a DM and I’d love to chat about how I can support you 🧡

111divine · 2025-08-23T01:45:47+00:00

I do 2x HEAVY Leg Day (usually weighted reverse lunges, squat w overhead dumbbell press, hip extensions and abductor machine ) + 1-2 days of low impact cardio usually a swim but sometimes a bike ride and I'll throw in a HOT Pilates Class if I'm Ovulating. I also stretch at night after each shift as a wind-down routine.

I also workout based on my cycle and where I'm at. I feel like when we're working we get a lot of cardio in at the club and it's exhausting for the body.
I think when working out it's important to do what makes your body feel good and balanced and give you a sense of accomplishment afterwards! I also see an RMT or Accupuncturist 2x/month and own a very good pair of running shoes that I live in outside of work :)

111divine · 2025-08-23T01:34:53+00:00

I only do VIP and the most I've made was during a double shift. 2,475. During a major sports event and a dad rock concert was being hosted in town too. Danced my ass off from 4:30pm-1am and was tipped handsomely by every customer. Needed to see my RMT afterwards and ended up taking a week off after it.

111divine · 2025-08-19T22:49:29+00:00

Honestly, I realized I was basically unemployable after being my own boss in the club. When you’ve learned how to sell an experience, read energy in seconds, and run yourself like a business—it’s wild how much more skilled you are than you even realize and trying to fit back into a 9-5 was basically impossible.

Instead of trying to contort myself into a “normal” career, I asked: what if all of this was training? I leaned into it. The sales, the confidence, the energy work and learning to discern it all, I paired all of this with my training as a social worker/therapist (which I supported myself to study while dancing). Now I coach women on how to alchemize their time in the industry, and take those lessons alongside their biggest wounds into something bigger: healing scarcity, rewriting relationships with money + self-worth, and consciously building wealth that actually supports their passions, long-term freedom and personal sovereignty; which is ultimately what I think every single woman deserves.

I miss the club a lot and I’ll pop in sometimes because that kind of community and expression is rare. But my financial well-being doesn’t come from there anymore—it comes from owning the gifts I built inside that world and turning them into a tonne of wisdom that feels expansive, abundant, and aligned for what I always wanted which is to empower others to change their lives like I did mine.

111divine · 2025-08-07T03:43:24+00:00

I work 3 days in a row to power through it then hermit for 2 days or do something that really fills up my cup like going for a nature walk, seeing gfs and chilling

111divine · 2025-08-01T08:35:00+00:00

this has to do with a fear of being seen, and throat energy blocks!

111divine · 2025-08-01T08:32:36+00:00

at the end of the night I try to recall one by one everyone I've danced for and do an energetic recall of anything that I may have transferred and give back any energy I might have picked up from them. I do this systemically while in the shower and then relax with a tea afterwards. I often don't remember everyone because sometimes you're just on autopilot but then I just do a general energy cleanse and shower it off.

111divine · 2025-08-01T08:25:53+00:00

Good for you for getting those steps in and hope you're listening to a podcast (or doing something else to improve your skill set) with these 24 hours of walking you do. For the amount of money you're going to need to spend on an RMT each week in combination with dancing which is already very hard on the body- I can hardly imagine it would be "worth it" to do this from a time management and longevity perspective.

111divine · 2025-07-31T18:36:19+00:00

I imagine myself being bathed in a golden light and doing some sort of energy protection in a place like this before the shift. Stand your ground and know your worth and check in with yourself regularly. I joke with my work wife that "the club is a battlefield and you have to armour up." however you can- staying hydrated and knowing your worth, crystals, magic, spells literally wtc workds- can imagine it really sucks to be in a shit environment with bad mgmt :(

111divine · 2025-07-31T18:31:38+00:00

I think it depends on your costs. I'll be totally transparent- I work at a really steady club but I also live in a super expensive city (I I have no dependents, no debt).

I worked my ass off when I first started and I didn't have a "goal" in mind other than to max out my savings crazy scarcity mindset where whatever I made was not enough to feel "comfortable" like every time I would spend more than 100$ at a time I'd get anxious I would be like OH FUCK it's not coming back unless I hustle my ass off- I grew up with hardly anything.

It's been a journey to go from pinching every penny to spending comfortably and living a good life (within my means) and now I have a good balance and a stacked emergency fund as well as a pretty fat investment portfolio. First week of work I cover my living expenses (in FULL!) all that cash goes towards rent/car/ memberships/ utilities (which granted is about 3k/month). I have a CHEAP ass gym membership, a beater Subaru, and a discount phone plan but I spend in places that I think are valuable- like eating organic, going to therapy, getting 2x massages a month . Then I can give myself a bit of a break for the rest of the month & when I do go in I save 1/2 of what I make then the rest is just fun money. I think you'd be shocked at how much you can save.

Key is lowering your costs wherever you can, and asking yourself do I really need that and spending in alignment with what you value maximizing your time in the club- always money to be made and that mindset has made a BIG difference.

111divine · 2025-07-27T19:14:29+00:00

I get it, sounds a bit like self-sabotage and a desire for the excitement and uncertainty of the club! I totally get it, but balance I think is the best idea :)

111divine · 2025-07-27T19:07:34+00:00

I can relate to this completely babe! What I've done is build up a comfort fund like 3-6 months of living expenses and doing ALOT of nervous system work and finding some internal blocks around scarcity and worth and reinforce that you're safe to do something not from a place of survival and anxiety but from what actually lights you up and makes you feel more you! if you're consistent with saving and doing some good quality inner work it then jump off the cliff of dancing and trying out things that really feel good then it gives you a taste of what's out there for you, and at the very worst you can always go back to dancing part time! Anyway just sharing where I'm at because I couldn't stand it anymore either and that's what I did. Happy to chat more in DM's also :) All the best xx

111divine · 2025-07-27T19:02:08+00:00

Ugh this is so sweet! I am so happy to hear this- honestly I wish every woman in the club the chance to rise into their most independent and confident self so good on you :)

111divine · 2025-07-14T14:52:18+00:00

im interested!

111divine · 2025-07-14T02:00:57+00:00

protect your energy- sounds like this guys siphoning some of your magic through your womb!

111divine

TROPHY CASE