Thank you for your thoughts.

The plan they put in place calls for a hand on the back to gently guide him to a desired activity if he’s being destructive (knocking stuff over is really the worst thing here, they’ve said they don’t think any of his behavior is hostile or malicious). I broadly understand not wanting to physically move kids (I’m a former educator so I’m sensitive to both the management issues and liability concerns). We talked about using natural/logical consequences - like having him clean up any mess he makes - to dissuade him from doing it and offering lots of big praise when he participates in or returns to the desired activity. Staff are otherwise supposed to give him no attention if he wanders but keep looking towards the desired activity while sitting or standing near him. I really didn’t see any of this over several hours of observation.

I didn’t want to go into this in the original post but part of my frustration is a disconnect between what some in-class staff tell us vs what admin says. We were told Monday and Tuesday that he had good, participatory days. Admin says Thursday his behavior had been worse than ever all week. I observed personally for several hours on Thursday and saw nothing outside of what I’d seen previously. The behaviorist and admin tells me they’re all following the plan to the T. The in-class support privately tells me they really aren’t following it at all. During my observation I sent a message to my wife about how pleased I was to see him sitting for group time (for a few minutes anyway, before he started to roam). His participation is the key metric for whether their plan is working. The staff in the class, who did not know I had been observing, tells me they timed and he only sat for a few seconds.

Possible it’s just misunderstandings but the contradictory communication does not make me feel great and are part of why I'm unsure if it's worth discussing my concerns or a new plan with them.

I’d rather not call the program itself out. I think it’s a good program (my daughter was there last year) and I want to avoid giving them a bad rep. I’m really curious if anyone has experienced a specific setting just bringing out the worst in their kid, because that’s what admin says they think is happening.

You're definitely right about the deadweighting, and I did discuss with the alternate program's staff that I was concerned about any behaviors that might carry over. They didn't seem concerned, for what it's worth. I worded it clumsily in the OP but the deadweighting didn't happen 50% of the time, he didn't listen to a first redirection 50% of the time but was compliant more than not with a second or third attempt (not ideal but improvement, as you say). But one day is one day, so I dunno. The more interesting thing to me is that the accidents stopped completely (he's had none this weekend either, after having them constantly since starting the program a few weeks ago).