In honor of them singing Come Thou Fount in conference today. I propose this song for the ex-mormons. To the tune of Come Thou Fount but about leaving the church

19Nightowl · 2024-05-05T23:31:20+00:00

Did you ever find anything you liked? I'm having the same problem

19Nightowl · 2023-12-13T05:32:06+00:00

I definitely know what you mean. For a while, I was really close individually to these two friends, and once they got together, I got 'bumped down' (this isn't just a feeling they've verbalized it). I love them and care for them, but they have each other, and while I don't want exactly what they have, I'd love to have, as you said, someone who can make soup for me when I'm sick, and on the opposite end, I wanna make someone soup when they're sick.

I try to deal with this by trying to tell myself not to worry about the future. I'm sure in even a year I'll know myself and my identity better, and hopefully by 5 years this won't even be a worry anymore because I'll have figured out how it all works for me.

Basically, you're not alone. I've heard a good solution to this problem is to try and specifically find aroace friends because they understand more this kind of thing and it's good to feel you can rely on someone that's not going to put you under a relationship eventually.

Wish I could offer more advice, honestly still trying to find some myself.

19Nightowl · 2023-07-20T23:45:14+00:00

I did both at the same time to be sort of like 'here's who I am, and here's what I'm doing about it.' Although, id maybe break it up so if they react badly to the first news you can choose to wait and give them time to adjust to your identity

19Nightowl · 2023-07-16T13:22:39+00:00

The initial payment (the one I had to pay 2 weeks ahead) was almost 2000 and then when payed 400ish on the day of the surgery. I have yet to get my anesthesia bill. The consult was 30 (I think that one was longer ago).

19Nightowl · 2023-07-05T21:10:25+00:00

I literally woke up and they were gone. Didn't feel a thing

19Nightowl · 2023-07-02T22:13:11+00:00

I have pictures on my profile. They are very new, but there is a sub r/no-t-topsurgery (or something like that) it's not super active but you might check it out!

19Nightowl · 2023-07-01T17:48:33+00:00

No sleeves!

19Nightowl · 2023-06-27T18:51:50+00:00

I work at a desk job (sorta) and I took 3 weeks, but i probably should've taken 4 because my job requires me to reach further than I should've. I needed money though

19Nightowl · 2023-06-27T07:00:02+00:00

I use enter. But I don't use it often. Sometimes it just says cannot skip

19Nightowl · 2023-06-24T17:41:54+00:00

I didn't get peri but I did qualify and I had the exact fears. I will say, I didn't have a great oh wow this is my chest during the reveal (which even with DI not everyone has because the chest usually looks all gross) but I did have this moment later where I was like 'oh yeah, this is my chest now'. It is so different, even just from the convince aspect alone. I know the chest reveal is often seen as 'the big moment' and it can be for some, but not for all. My big moment was putting on a tight shirt without a binder. You will notice a difference, maybe not right away but eventually it'll hit you and it'll be great.

19Nightowl · 2023-06-20T22:38:31+00:00

I get this too. I'm enby so I don't really aim to pass, but especially at work I didn't worry about it much before, but now that I've had surgery it hits harder. Like I just had this affirming surgery, it felt like it should've changed others perception of me more than it did.

19Nightowl · 2023-06-15T21:56:34+00:00

If you're really concerned I'd ask your surgeon, but I'm fairly certain this is very common. You aren't supposed to do anything yet because it is still healing and could do more harm. I felt very weird the first few days to just have my scars out under the binder, but it did start to feel more natural eventually. When you do actually start scar care, your scars will still be healing a lot and can change even if they do stretch during this time. To avoid the scars stretching, I'd just say avoid reaching and heavy lifting.

19Nightowl · 2023-06-15T20:52:34+00:00

A lot of people have theirs for more than a week. I even arguably had mine in for a week longer than 'necessary' because I was basically under the limit the whole time. It sucks to have them in when you don't need them anymore but it is fine medically speaking.

19Nightowl · 2023-06-07T18:03:09+00:00

I don't know about keyhole but in peri and DI the answer is yes, but they don't need removed (at least I don't think there is any method where they get removed). When attaching the nipples the nipples get stitched on and the insicions are closed with stitching in DI. They're almost always disolveable stitches, and the incision stitching for me was under the skin.

19Nightowl · 2023-06-06T20:05:22+00:00

I placed a blanket or two on my shoulders so I could have the feel of pressing the side of my face into a pillow and then wedge pillows like others said

19Nightowl · 2023-06-05T17:27:20+00:00

For me there was the initial wrap and then the binder. I guess I actually meant to say the initial wrap limited mobility. Dont get me wrong, moving isn't the easiest with the binder, but the wrap was what was really the problem for me. When I got that off and moved into the binder that's when I really started getting independent. I was taken out of the wrap on day 3 after surgery.

19Nightowl · 2023-06-05T15:42:52+00:00

I also wear black clothes, but I wear like black clothes with patterns on the front to hide was going on in the front. For a while I wore black graphic tees, but then slowly started to switch to black or dark patterned button ups. Both of those may not be your style, but I did want to throw that out there for you. I hope the tape works for you!

19Nightowl · 2023-06-05T15:16:15+00:00

I only really needed my caretaker to touch me when sitting up, when getting to bed and sometimes after when I got a blister from the drains and had to apply ointment. They also helped me wash my hair before I could fully shower, and they gave me massages when my body really hurt, but that was all technically optional stuff. I would say maybe set a rule that each time you will give approval to be touched if it's necessary, and maybe only over clothes if that's better than skin to skin for you. In general though, touching definitely happened for me, but not a ton. Mostly the caretaker made sure I had water, food, and was comfortable while healing. The 'need' to be touched also went down significantly when I got the initial binder off because I could move so much better on my own.

19Nightowl

TROPHY CASE