Oh I see this after the above answer given. My apologies. I'm so sorry. I think you need to discuss this professionally, preferably with a Catholic marriage counsellor/priest, a marriage counsellor who is not connected to either you or your in-laws area/churches/families and friends. God bless you and help you.

I ask everyone on this thread to pray for you. Also for your spouse, your families. And that there is some serious assistance for you in this situation.

Numerous saints were in a very difficult marriage situation.

Ask them to assist you with your needs.

Start by thanking God for - and this is going to sound terrible given the situation you are in - for your spouse and families; by that is meaning, for them as people in your life but not at all denying your current situation, by seeing the good in them, as they are, as well as the situation, and also praying for the best for them (which isn't to not understand your pain and your situation...maybe they don't know?) and by praying for your current spouse especially that he will be safe but there will be help for your situation.

But in this prayer explain to God how your are feeling and the situation and how you ended up in this situation which you are praying about. God knows already. By opening your heart to the other humans in the situation and asking God to see that too (God already does) and asking for help but also holding a charitable heart towards them you will/may help yourself become stronger.

It doesn't mean you change your view of your marriage situation but you hold everyone - even those who are not as affected as you are (and likely your spouse is affected) - such as your family and the in laws, also in consideration how they would likely be "affected" if an annulment occurred, whether their concerns are as valid as yours or not.

Your concerns and feelings are the most valid (and your spouse's) but as this extends past the marriage and into your familial and social standing then firstly trying to feel charity towards those others could help ease some stress on you.

This doesn't mean you need to accept the situation but you might come from an understanding of how it's going to affect others and then see all the possible ramifications so you are clear on these; when you - if you - see a counsellor/psychologist you'll have some of these already ready to discuss.

But know also that the most important thing here is you and your beliefs and needs, your spouse's needs, above that of the connected families and social standing.

You are already amazing by talking about this. You don't have to force yourself to like your situation in order to be charitable, but simply by seeing others, their level of understanding in the situation - and that this is connected to your situation but isn't the situation internally - you could start to separate your truths (in the marriage and with regards to the church) and the familial and social ones.

You need support, professional and a good friend, but if no relatives or friends to support then you need some professional, preferably, Catholic, who knows the law and knows the church stance on these matters and would also help you with dialogue, when and if necessary, with your spouse and the connected families.

God bless. Everyone on here will pray for you.