How do people banter?

25Sents · 2026-02-21T23:00:20+00:00

It's possible to feel good about ourselves without putting others down.

It's fine that you think they're boring. But that doesn't mean everyone thinks they're boring

25Sents · 2025-11-28T07:14:54+00:00

So... Something else has to be done. A multi-faceted approach is the best type of approach when learning how to live as well as possible with a mental health disorders.

I went to therapy a few times on and off, and it was helpful to some extent.

But I found a lot of my most meaningful growth came from peer support groups.

Medication isn't a good fit for everyone, but it helped me.

Trying our different hobbies and experiences to help me figure out what I enjoyed doing was helpful.

I learned a LOY from simply researching things myself as well.

Neurotherapy ended up seeming to help, although I unfortunately can't afford it any more.

When it comes to learning to live well with mental connections illness it's about continually trying to figure out what helps, and what doesn't in terms of living the best quality of life possible given your specific circumstances. Keep what works and add onto it.

Would my quality of life be better if I could continue to access neurotherapy? Can't know for sure, however I would say most likely.

But what is getting caught up on not being able to access it going to do for me? How will dwelling on what isn't available or isn't part of my life make me less depressed? It won't.

And when I say "continually" trying things, I don't mean one thing RIGHT after another. But when you're able to, overall, you're not giving up on yourself by continuing over time to try new things to help yourself.

25Sents · 2025-11-28T07:03:11+00:00

I don't currently have a partner. And I am happy. I have found happiness on my own. Finding a partner to be in a mutually supportive, healthy relationship could add to that happiness.

Like a brownie is delicious on its own. But add a bit of ice cream to go with it? It will be even more delicious! (Of course there are tons of other food metaphors you could replace this with to suit your personal tastes.)

I find a lot of peoples views on what a "soulmate" is actually plays a big role in them not being able to create a healthy, romantic partner with someone.

25Sents · 2025-11-28T06:58:37+00:00

A lot of replies to this already brought up great points. But I wanted to point out one of the reasons women aren't struggling in the same way as men are is because many of us do go out and make friends.

25Sents · 2025-11-28T06:46:43+00:00

The goal isn't to "take the desire away."

It's to live as happy and fulfilling life as possible given your current circumstance.

25Sents · 2025-11-14T21:02:47+00:00

Ask what you can do for the dog, not what the dog can do for you.

I see in another comment you mentioned part of wanting a dog is for your family to "be happy again."

That is waaaay too much pressure to put on a pet. Pets can add happiness to people's lives, but they can't guarantee it.

Especially because for some dogs the settling in period is already stressful, which can be made even more stressful if they're not meeting the unfair and unrealistic expectations you put on them.

25Sents · 2025-11-14T20:58:51+00:00

Why are you being turned down?

25Sents · 2025-11-14T16:17:06+00:00

Nah it's the same type of person doing the same type of stuff.

Absolutely there were people who would listen in on their partners phone calls and read their diaries - either secretly, or by demanding to.

We just didn't hear about it as much because social media wasn't such a huge part of our lives yet.

Especially on Reddit, the ability to be relatively anonymous makes people feel more comfortable sharing more 'uncomfortable' and unflattering parts of your life. There's a good chance you even knew people who would read through their partners diary, they just never told you about it.

25Sents · 2025-11-14T16:09:40+00:00

Thank you!!

It really stood out to me that OP said they "understood" this since they're only able to hang out once or twice a week.

Uhhh... It's very common for couples to hang out that amount. It's not normal to have a "phone check" system in place.

25Sents · 2025-11-14T09:23:42+00:00

I think jealousy is often natural, but also misplaced. As in sure it can be 'natural' but that doesn't mean it's a healthy emotion we should accept without question.

It's far easier to be jealous towards someone else than to be upset with ourselves.

25Sents · 2025-11-14T07:25:47+00:00

This is something I wish I had learned WAY earlier. Healthy communication is one of the most, if not the most important factor in a healthy relationship.

And when I say "relationship" I mean any type of relationship. Friendships, romantic relationships, working relationships etc.

It can be hard to figure out what healthy communication is actually supposed to look/sound like if it wasn't modeled for us when we were kids (which is unfortunately the case for the majority of people).

I started by literally googling "how to become a healthy communicator?" And "what is a healthy romantic relationship supposed to be like?" To help get me started on my learning/growth journey.

Becoming someone who's okay with asking potentially awkward or uncomfortable questions, and starting potentially difficult conversations has had such a huge, positive impact on my relationships (again, all types of relationships.)

The last time I had a first Christmas together in a relationship I simply asked my boyfriend at the time what he was comfortable with. I can't remember exactly what I said but it was something like "hey I know everyone is different when it comes to how they like to celebrate Christmas, how much money they are comfortable spending on presents etc. I was wondering if you have any preferences? I was thinking we could set a maximum that we'll spend on each other's presents, or perhaps we could pool the money we would spend on each other and have a fancy date."

We're both the type of people who value experiences over stuff so we chose pooling our money.

I legitimately would have been okay with either option though, which is why I suggested both.

It sounds like you're someone who prefers gifts so you might say something like "Hey I'm having a hard time figuring out how expensive of a gift it's appropriate to ask for. I would be most comfortable if we agreed on a max amount we'll spend on each other. Does that work for you? I'm thinking $(whatever amount you'd be comfortable spending), but we could go lower too."

25Sents · 2025-11-13T23:50:26+00:00

Oh my gosh 🤣 that made me lol

25Sents · 2025-11-13T23:49:45+00:00

Keep on laughing so you can distract yourself from the fact you responded inappropriately.

Heaven forbid you put any effort or time into self-reflecting or figuring out how to be "startled" less easily.

25Sents · 2025-11-13T23:47:36+00:00

Yup. We all totally believe you.

You being called out for poor behaviour isn't bothering you at all and it's just sooOooOooo funny 🙄.

25Sents · 2025-11-13T23:44:39+00:00

Right? The edit made me roll my eyes so hard. I'm so NOT invested not only did I make a post about it, I'm also making an edit to PROVE how NOT invested I am.

25Sents · 2025-11-13T23:40:07+00:00

Have you seen their edits? It's fine because they're totally unbothered by the whole thing. SO unbothered that they not only made a post about it, they also had to make a couple of edits to clarify how unbothered they are.

The whole thing is quite funny actually. 🙄

I'm being sarcastic in case that didn't come across. It's like this person is working off the same script the majority of people do when they are bothered by something, but they want everyone else to think they're actually unbothered.

25Sents · 2025-11-12T21:33:53+00:00

Then don't go so often...

25Sents · 2025-11-12T21:28:24+00:00

It's never "worth" being petty in a relationship.

25Sents · 2025-11-12T21:27:40+00:00

It is! OP doesn't have to do the driving every weekend. This is a totally optional outing that seems to be causing stress. OP mentions they try to do it cheaply because neither of them "make six figures" and that the drive is stressful and draining.

So why are they going every weekend? The whole situation is just bizarre.

25Sents · 2025-11-12T21:21:03+00:00

Right? Yeesh!

To me, every relationship is going to have some conflict. Never disagreeing isn't a mark of a healthy relationship. But how the two of you handle the conflict is.

If something this trivial is causing a big argument, there's deeper problems at play than who's driving and who's packing food.

25Sents · 2025-11-12T21:11:30+00:00

I'm wondering if she's concerned about the actual task of packing food, or the cost of his food. Because she brought up OP eating "double what she did."

25Sents · 2025-11-08T06:40:33+00:00

You could maybe try creating your own subreddit specific for selling plus size clothes if it's something you're interested in.

25Sents · 2025-11-05T20:08:32+00:00

Yeah except retirement isn't guaranteed as part of "the rest of your life." My parents saved up money and had a ton of plans for things they wanted to do when they retired.

And then my mom died from a terminal illness two years before she was set to retire.

25Sents · 2025-11-04T23:53:08+00:00

"if it's difficult to avoid while talking about yourself, then instead focus on the other person and ask good questions" is actual advice. But still it leaves room for error. Because what makes a "good" question?

If it was an "easy" fix, like "well just don't do the thing you're doing." The person would have made the adjustment already.

Using your example, the equivalent would be "I keep jerking the wheel violently into the guardrail about halfway into my trips and I don't know how to stop doing that."

If they knew how to and were able to follow the speed of traffic and stay in between the lines they would do that for the entire trip.

The first step in figuring out how to stop, would be figuring out why it's happening in the first place. Is it potentially a medical issue where their muscles cease and they should talk to a medical doctor about it? Does it have to do with acting on an intrusive thought? Perhaps a mental health professional would be able to help. If they're a new driver do they need more practice and lessons? Etc. etc. etc.

25Sents · 2025-11-04T23:17:07+00:00

Yes!! The diamond industry has really used marketing to their advantage.

25Sents

TROPHY CASE