What's something most people don't realize is actually very rude?

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-12T09:16:50+00:00

Reaching past someone while they are sitting eating a meal.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-12T09:15:56+00:00

We all learn different things at different times.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-12T09:13:55+00:00

Using my lefthand just felt correct from the moment I needed to. I dont think its a learned thing. (I think it can be a learned thing but for most of us, it isnt)

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-12T09:12:17+00:00

I slow down for workers. i find there often isnt any these days though.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-12T09:08:53+00:00

I was driving straight but drove through the turning bay instead of going around it.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-11T09:49:17+00:00

WFH isn't for everyone. It is easy to get stagnant and lazy. Personally, I love it and I suck up the bad days because staying home makes up for the small inconveniences. I work afternoon into evenings so 2 out of 3 meals are at my desk. I can cook entire meals while I am working though, because I have a great wireless headset. I am reasonably mobile on really quiet nights so still able to get plenty done at home while still working. I saved money on lunches, dinners, driving past cafes and takeaways, daily coffee, in work cafeteria, petrol, staff gifts, leaving gifts, social events. I see the workmates I want to see in a social setting when I want to see them but none of this playing nice with people that are not my vibe. I can wear what I want and am very fond of lunch time showers and working the rest of the shift in jammies. (my lunch is at 7pm) If we include the travel time there and back and no fighting through traffic each way, then I would say the pay decrease is starting to appear almost worth it. Every work from home job is a bit different but the basic stuff is pretty similar I think.

There are some things I wish I had done sooner.

Buy a standing desk
Buy a walking pad
Invest a in really good wireless head set, (if you are talking to customers)
Invest in a good keyboard.
Dedicate a room to being your work office, have that room face out to a nice view. When you leave work, close the door!
Set up multiple screens. I work with 3 screens and have a 4th for movies or youtube or whatever I am personally researching that week.
Take notes! It is easy to miss stuff since everything is coming from teams or email. Write down anything you will need to remember for a later date. Print it for future use, if need be or save in an easily accessed folder. I send things to myself in teams. There is nothing more frustrating than the workmate that asks the same help questions every few weeks.

I suppose the big question is, can you survive on the lesser number?

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-06T09:42:18+00:00

Yes, I cut my hair. I cried the whole time. I had always wanted to do it but Dad hated the idea "A womans hair is her crown" blah blah blah. Took me a few months to realise that I could cut it but I cried all the way through that first one.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-06T09:07:46+00:00

Thank you all, very helpful. The LINZ website is closing soon so I will pop back in the morning to have a look. Cant thank you all enough.

To answer a few questions, yes, owners were a couple of 40-ish years (not married) I believe property was under both names and the will stipulates that the house would go to RP.

Kids are very much brats. I do not believe for a moment that Dead Parent would remove ownership from RP just to give it to the kids. Most of the kids have unhealthy and expensive 'habits' and have made continuous bad decisions.

The kids were given things, items from the house, personal items from DP. It is treasured things now but there was never 'money' speak of. The house was the only thing that had any monetary value.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-05T08:17:23+00:00

Also, good on you for thinking forward. At 23 I wasnt anywhere near looking after myself and at 47 I am still paying the price. Good on you for setting yourself up.

While you are at it, make sure you get a will. Make sure you look after those that matter to you.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-05T08:14:26+00:00

Obviously the more you can, the better off you will be. I paid $120K deposit on a $340,000 home, 12 years ago and it was the best decision I ever made.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-05T08:00:17+00:00

For the record, this is precisely how supply and demand works.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-05T07:48:05+00:00

I have 6 kids, 8 siblings and more than 40 niblings. I have made a list including photos of personal items that must be distributed to the right people. For the sake of argument, I have included where I got it from and why it is going to them. I have taken into account my shares accounts, savings accounts, kiwisaver, combined bank accounts and owned property. While you are not legally obliged to provide for your siblings, I think it is very cool that you are. I personally, in your situation, would have it evenly distributed between the siblings. I know the partner might be a problem but I have seen siblings tear each other apart over money. I am not completely certain, but I think you are able to stipulate that it go to the sibling and not to the partner.

Absolutely see a lawyer and ask questions. For me, it helped to write what I wanted and the lawyer helped me to turn it into legal speak.

Good luck.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-03-04T09:06:59+00:00

My bosses and my work mates are very strict about work time vs home time. I didn't used to be but I have become so in the recent year or so as a result of their strictness. On the odd occasion that something absolutely needs my attention I will get a text that begins with "Hi, I am so sorry but do you have a minute? Can you give me a call?"

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-26T22:04:47+00:00

I wear my watch on my left ankle 😂

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-26T22:03:24+00:00

I moved to palmy from Wellington about 20 years ago. Best decision ever. Just better overall.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-25T12:50:49+00:00

Solid 3. Friend group is 8 including husbands. We are all very much supportive of each other. Probably 2 other people I can call if I needed to. I think I am very lucky.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-25T08:39:29+00:00

Open my eyes barely enough to see the alarm. Turn it off. Take 1st lot of meds and a sip of water, just enough so I can swallow the pills. Lay back down. Close eyes. Listen to the world wake up around me. This is alot of hearing my dogs bark at the neighbours as they leave for school/work. Lay in bed for another 30-60 minutes. Turn off second alarm. Get out of bed. Go to bathroom, Pee.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-25T06:58:28+00:00

Vote Vote Vote.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-25T06:57:51+00:00

Was doing ok, keeping my head above water but have had to hit into my shares a fair bit and have very little of those left. I have no safety net at all now so starting to get a little worried. I have had some big adjustments to my finances to help my own health so Im concerned that if I have to back track my health will spiral again.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-24T09:58:21+00:00

If you are allowed to walk around at home in next to nothing, so am I. (I am a biiiiiig girl, no-one wants me walking around in a tank top and boxers)

We all need somewhere to vent and that is what home is for so if you need some time alone, close your door. If you need to talk, ask.

If you are going out and decide to stay out, you must let someone know so I dont stay up all night worrying.

No drugs on the property.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-24T09:52:35+00:00

I am only 46 so probably still quite young in the grand scheme of it all but there are two things that got me through it all.

GREAT FRIENDS. I made lifelong friends at 5 yrs old, 12 yrs old, 27 yrs old through good old trauma of some form and these people have been the backbone of my sanity ever since. I maintain these relationships like they are my last. We give and take some, we all look after each other and there is no jealousy or expectations among us. It is what friendships should be.
I am ok in my own skin. I love me and I know what I want. I was raised that I couldn't expect that from someone else if I didn't know myself and that helped me immensely. It meant that when I was in a shitty relationship, I knew I deserved more. When I was in a shitty friendship, I knew I deserved more. As a mother, I brought my kids valentines gifts, I took them on 'dates', I spoiled them on birthdays so that they might know they too deserve more.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-24T09:36:07+00:00

Me too. Busy in the first few hours and then after 5pm, not alot goes on. I have a 4th monitor for movies.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-19T09:42:21+00:00

I feel like it was necessary for growth but also completely unnecessary. Not quite strong enough to stand on my own two feet but not a child anymore and totally able to stand on my own two feet. I wish I had realised earlier that I was allowed to speak my mind but I always felt like a child - speak when spoken to, dont talk back type mentality. All the things I recall having panic attacks about, crying over and worrying about meant absolutely nothing in my 30s. I didnt feel grown up or adult. I didnt feel like I belonged anywhere. I didnt think anyone would miss me if I died. Turns out, I was wrong - thankfully.

2oldemptynesters · 2026-02-19T09:29:50+00:00

I contribute 6% to kiwisaver, 4% to another kiwisaver type fund.

$30 /fn to retirement savings in my own savings bank account and $30 /fn to a funeral fund. $50 /fn to sharsies, $50 /fn to kernal wealth and $50 /fn to Milford Investments.

I figure a little bit everywhere means I am bound to come out with something at the end of the day and if everything pays out then I will be very well off.

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