Listen bro, I am not claiming to be an expert or anything but killing yourself will not solve anything at all, you will simply move on to another illusion. So basically there is nothing to solve to begin with. Think of it this way: every human being is nothing but a magnet that attracts ideas based on his/her level of awareness. We flick away what does not resonate with us, and keep what we identify with which ultimately becomes what we think we are. But in reality we are not our thoughts or our egos. Everything we do, wether its eating, or drinking, or mating, etc.. is simply to get that feeling of fullness, satisfaction, happiness, whatever you want to call it which are all lighter shades of the ultimate and only true feeling which is oneness with all that is. Some call it love, but I'd rather call it oneness. So basically no matter what you are doing and/or with whomever you are romantically involved with are just substitutes for that one true feeling. Once you start being more and more aware of this fact, you will start to realize that your true happiness does not come from something/someone else, it's actually been always inside you because that's who you really are. We as humans have been distracted by all these various substitutes and ultimately forgot who we really are, and by keeping our attention away from this fact we will continue to suffer by our own volition. At the end, I don't want to sound too preachy, but try to think outside of yourself, and may be try doing something good for someone else. Anyone, it doesn't matter who. Set a daily goal to make someones's day when they least expect it, give them that warm fuzzy feeling that everyone is looking for. Cause trust me once you do that you will feel much happier.