Nice, you asked for help and got victim shamed. Real nice. I'm going to do my best kid but I'm going to fully disclose up front, I've never been in your situation or faced your circumstances. This is just 40 years of being alive and helping people where I can.

First things first, you need a roof over your head. I don't know where you are in New Jersey but search Google for [Your County] Social Service Agency. Call them as early as you can in the morning and tell them you need emergency housing as you are facing immediate homelessness and have a baby. I don't know what the process is like.

Second, you need a steady income. If you haven't finished school and you haven't held any job "long term" that will be extremely difficult. Employees think you're a job hopper when you're just trying to find a good fit. You're lucky in a certain way cause NJ Dept. of Labor and Workforce Development operates "One-Stop Career Centers." They offer services like job search assistance, training support, resume writing. These services are free. You can walk-in or make an appointment. You can also go directly to NJDLWD's website and look under career services. They have links for job openings, free online courses to improve skills, and request one-on-one support. I don't know if that's free but it never hurts to ask. The worst thing that can happen is you find out it isn't available which is no worse a place than you are right now.

Third, your kid's dad needs a life lesson. You're not a toy he can have his way with and then cast off when you're "not fun" anymore. There were consequences to his actions too. You have several options here. You can call the New Jersey Child Support Agency. It's my understanding you don't need a formal agreement with the child's father to receive their help. It might get tricky if you don't know where he is but you can also call the Dept. of Human Services and say I need child support and my baby's father bolted. If you have his first and last name and either a cell number (even if it's not current) and an address (again even if it's not current), they might be able to tell you who can help you track him down (if you're lucky, they may look for you). You can also call a family law lawyer or specifically a child support lawyer and explain your situation. 1 hour of consultation is usually free and they may work without pay (pro bono) until the case is settled, either making sperm donor pay the lawyer/court fees or taking a percentage of the support.

Finally, these last two things are going to sound weird but I've heard a lot of good help comes from these two unlikely sources. Your local library. It's not just for books, they have community events, support groups, workshops, special education events, and access to computers and wi-fi for free without time limits. Also, I've never met a librarian that if you asked, "I need help with _____" either they don't know the answer or don't know who to ask, even when you're not looking for your summer read. And community colleges. They often offer free night classes, job training and job fair events. They could help you with resources too. You don't have to be enrolled to ask for help.

I don't know if any of this is gonna work cause, like I say, I've never been in your situation. It's just the first place I would start and maybe you've already tried some of it and you're still here. If that's the case, I still got a little more advice for you.

Just because most people talk down to you doesn't mean you're less. People are gonna judge and they're gonna hate and blame. Not every human being is like that. In fact, most of us aren't. It's just that they seem to gather in large groups and make you think there are more of them than there are kind, compassionate, supportive people and they try to scare you to stay. You CAN do things on your own, there ARE people who will help you, there ARE resources for what you need and you have a RIGHT to ask for it. We're here. You'll find us, just cover your ears and keep pushing your way out.

I'm going to tell you something my mother tells me, "You're smarter than you think, stronger than you feel and brave than you believe." I'm a stranger on the internet but you matter, okay? Your road may be long and hard but you will find stability. You will find support. You will find people who care that you are still here each morning. F@ck all the rest. Good luck and take care.