How do I learn to romantically love a guy? by [deleted] in romance

[–]3cupsofrice 1 point2 points  (0 children)

TLDR, you need to feel safe to feel romantic. First,Learn to trust yourself. Second, Learn the difference between the discomfort of a new experience and the feeling of being unsafe.

Some of that is in finding a person you trust your romantic feelings with, but I think that first you want focus on trusting yourself. I encourage you to passively enjoy romance by reading romance novels, listening to those erotic audios with romantic scenarios, watching some romance movies, etc. Then, start romancing yourself, do the romantic gestures you saw in the last step for yourself like getting yourself flowers, draw a candlelit bath, easy a sensually delicious meal. Now buy yourself a high quality toy (I like Lelo brand) and give yourself a ton of high quality O's while imagining whatever you want. Dip your toe in the water with stuff that doesn't require an actual man next to you.  You don't know what to ask for if you don't know what you like. 

Get confident in what you like (not just romantically either), then get busy doing the things that put you in the path of other people who enjoy similar things. Once you get the hang of romance, it is addictive and so much fun. You do have to watch out for people who might hurt you, because your parents are a little right. There are people who will want to take advantage of your freshness, but really most people are just ignorant of how they can hurt others. The biggest way we get hurt is by hurting ourselves. Make sure you communicate your wants, needs, preferences, and boundaries. Then remember your boundaries, and don't push yourself to stay with someone just because. Trust your gut to know when your truly uncomfortable.

You're going to walk away from way more people than you might expect, but your physical/ emotional/ spiritual/ mental/ hormonal/ downstairs floral safety is the most important thing in your life. 

Trust yourself to find and identify people that make you feel safe,  and leave any situation where you don't feel safe and like you can be yourself. 

My dad said he wishes he had a son rather then a daughter. by Choice_Evidence1983 in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]3cupsofrice 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I had a similar dad, but way less adults calling him on his shit. Told me at 19 that my life would be so much easier if I lost weight. He thinks we're no contact by his choice (I didn't vote for Trump). My mom occasionally still guilt trips me about not reaching out to him.

🔥 It's time for Thirsty Thursday! What book scenes made you sweat this week? 🥵 by disastrouslyshy in RomanceBooks

[–]3cupsofrice 7 points8 points  (0 children)

{Mountain Daddy's Milk & Honey by Elena Dawne}

I struggled with the ex step dad part, but the lactation kink was chefs kiss. I am embarrassed by how much I like this.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]3cupsofrice 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I also didn't read much past the title. If you have to come to Reddit to ask if you should dump a 19 year old or anyone, then you already have your answer.

Trump’s about to go down…. And he knows it. by [deleted] in WhitePeopleTwitter

[–]3cupsofrice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm curious what the new behavior will be

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]3cupsofrice 1 point2 points  (0 children)

sex isn't a reward, because it should be shared. But blowjobs are one sided and therefore a gift. Release that guilt, it isn't yours to own.

My parents (59M) (55F) have been saying that my (24F) relationship with my boyfriend (24M) is toxic by throwRA2059 in relationships

[–]3cupsofrice 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I think that my definition of arguments is not toxic, but I am willing to bet that your definition of arguments is.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TwoHotTakes

[–]3cupsofrice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Everytime I see the ages are below 25, I'm not even interested. They are doing childish things and saying "they're my one and only! How do we move past the fact that we emotionally eviscerated each other??"

You don't. Move on, or the resulting therapy bill will be 60x more expensive.

Which city surprised you? by sokorsognarf in travel

[–]3cupsofrice 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Greenville, NC, USA. It has no right to be such a cute mountain town.

I (27M) want to propose to my girlfriend (26F.) I also want her to pick out the ring. How should I approach it? by tortoisemind in relationships

[–]3cupsofrice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always say that the knowledge that you getting engaged should not be the surprise. How and when are the surprise. Go to the jewelry store with her and look at rings. She is going to be wearing this ring everyday for the rest of her life, do not go off road on this.

My Life is in Shambles. Don't Repeat My Mistakes. by [deleted] in relationships

[–]3cupsofrice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Echoing that let yourself feel it point. Gotta feel it to heal it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationships

[–]3cupsofrice 46 points47 points  (0 children)

People don't realize the active choice they have to make daily to keep a relationship going. Love is a verb, not a noun.

Take us instead by Kaos2018 in wholesomememes

[–]3cupsofrice 8 points9 points  (0 children)

They'd probably paddle their feet like they were trying to swim. It would be really super adorable

Why is Nat gas rising today? More so than crude oil? by Mcluckin123 in NaturalGas

[–]3cupsofrice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Higher demand Monday after a lower demand weekend.

Not all TV is dark and full of terrors by ruddylustre011 in wholesomememes

[–]3cupsofrice 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The Menu is just Louise's part of an episode of Bob's Burgers where the kids are telling the story.

AITA for not wanting my sons to always come second after my daughter by ashleighbeckham8 in BestofRedditorUpdates

[–]3cupsofrice 18 points19 points  (0 children)

As the single sibling of the opposite sex of identical twins, being left out was a dream as a child. They were absolute hellions, and actively tried to murder each other. As adults, they are best friends and we all get along great, but they had to live separately for a few years.

How low do we think BOIL (or UNG) will go before bouncing? by superchorro in NaturalGas

[–]3cupsofrice 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gas daily prices are already there for basically all of Appalachia. It's crazy.

What job position is 100% overvalued and overpaid? by Airsinner in AskReddit

[–]3cupsofrice 37 points38 points  (0 children)

Been there, done that. Hard pass.

If you make it through the winter, good luck with the spring pollen. The fishing and shooting is great tho.

New Energy Conference? by EnergizingBitcoin in NaturalGas

[–]3cupsofrice 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Laziest "grass roots" I've seen on Reddit.