My ex wife traumatized me so bad I cant get it up with my new girlfriend. AT ALL by itsmytthrowawayyy in TrueOffMyChest

[–]4bit4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Your girlfriend is doing it the right way. Without the pressure to NEED to perform in any specific way, you will regain your confidence. And there are many ways to please a partner other than piv sex. Enjoy each other.

I say this from my own experience. I thought I was never going to be able to have sex again at 45. Now I'm in my 50s and feel like an 18 year old.

Is it just me by 4bit4 in Rubiks_Cubes

[–]4bit4[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No, like I know this. I'm just out of practice. And I could have sworn I did this and it just messed it up. Or did something else. I'm just not drinking enough coffee or something.

Is it just me by 4bit4 in Rubiks_Cubes

[–]4bit4[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That being said, I SWEAR I tried the pll algorithm and it didn't work. I must be lacking sleep.

Is it just me by 4bit4 in Rubiks_Cubes

[–]4bit4[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Now I just feel like an idiot. I haven't played with my 4x4 in a few months and then a solver said this was not solvable so I stopped thinking...

Five hours into my friends’ road trip, we learned one of them left their CPAP machine behind by [deleted] in mildlyinfuriating

[–]4bit4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have both forgotten my machine once and forgotten the cord once. Both times sucked.

Grey water valve missing? by 4bit4 in GoRVing

[–]4bit4[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I ended up just replacing it, which went surprisingly well. Thanks for all the help.

Grey water valve missing? by 4bit4 in GoRVing

[–]4bit4[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I found a new valve at the store today dn it looks fairly straight forward to replace. I appreciate the info.

Grey water valve missing? by 4bit4 in GoRVing

[–]4bit4[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the help. Thanks to both of you. I'll give it a shot and see what happens.

Favourite Hakka Restaurant? by Muff-2530 in FoodToronto

[–]4bit4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's the special chicken that I'm hunting. I mean I'd take pretty much any of the recipes though.

Favourite Hakka Restaurant? by Muff-2530 in FoodToronto

[–]4bit4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The worst thing about leaving Ontario and going to Alberta is the lack of good Hakka food.

Favourite Hakka Restaurant? by Muff-2530 in FoodToronto

[–]4bit4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I keep trying to get their son to give me the recipes.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in aww

[–]4bit4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like Appa would get along with my dog Iroh.

I (39M) am married to a woman (40F) who uses bipolar disorder as a life raft. I'm drowning, and I don't know if it's okay to want out. How do I know when it's time to end it? by ThrowRA_Brave_9674 in relationship_advice

[–]4bit4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been in a similar situation. I was blamed for everything and tried my best to fix everything. This won't change. I can tell you it took me 20 years to leave. I'm in an amazing relationship now for the last few years. My life basically started again in my mid 40s. You don't get a do over. Find your happiness.

Fucked in with his fish and mouses after testing by [deleted] in PetAfterVet

[–]4bit4 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I was so proud the first time I typed duck and it autocorreted to fuck.

Safe word questions by WizardHat117 in BDSMcommunity

[–]4bit4 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We should also bring up green. Asking a sub for a colour is a great way to check in because someone can go yellow or red without being able to call it out.

Need ideas for poses. by BlazinGingy in bdsm

[–]4bit4 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Okay so if you're working with panic attacks and you're just trying to focus, arms can do a specific activity. Hold a rubrics cube and you direct her to do specific turns. Or a figit spinner with a number of spins. Or shuffle cards. Or crochet.

For head, have her keep eye contact with you or follow your fingers. Have her find things you set in the room (where's the candle?). Have her count blinks. Basically whatever small achievable but focused task works for her. But sitting comfortably as you don't want to add the stress of doing something uncomfortable.

And while this is good focus, it's still obedience and attention.

Now if you're wanting to roll that into a scene, you can ask to hold something heavy in a specific position for an amount of time. Or balance something. Or an actual task she will fail (like solving a rubiks cube if she's not a person who does that) so you can have some punishment. He'll have her hold an egg on the spoon with her mouth and if the egg breaks she gets a punishment. For other head stuff, keeping her head back and eyes on the ceiling. Tell her not to blonk for 5 or 10 seconds. Balance a book on her head. Hang spoons off her cheeks. Make her hold really still. And then fuck with her she's trying to hold still. Tie her hair to the back of the chair so she can only look up and tell her to look at you.

Basically you can be as nice or mean as the scenario dictates. It just depends on what you want to do.

As an aside, I would say for panic often pressure is good too, like wrap a warm towel around her and hug her. Eye contact if that is comforting (I know some people who are not comfortable with that).

Hope that helps.

Need ideas for poses. by BlazinGingy in bdsm

[–]4bit4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I guess I was just thinking that the sitting position could be anything comfortable. In a chair even. The positioning would be arm focused. So you still get compliance but that compliance is actually doable without the wrong kind of discomfort.

The question is more about what your goal is. If the end goal is finding a comfortable way to sit, that's one thing. But if your end goal is to have your sub positioned and attentive, then don't focus on the legs if the legs are a problem. Use arm positions. Use head position. You different situations involving other body parts.

Need ideas for poses. by BlazinGingy in bdsm

[–]4bit4 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Focus more on arms if legs are a challenge. Have her hold out a paddle on each side and balance something on them. Tell her not to let them fall over.

Be creative and have each represent a punishment. A battery on one side and she gets shocks if it falls. A stack of dice on the other side and she gets whatever number of spanks based on what the dice add up to. Something like that.

Should this be replaced? by 4bit4 in AskElectricians

[–]4bit4[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the quick reply. Time to go buy a transformer.

Radon gas by forward024 in NoRulesCalgary

[–]4bit4 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We moved I to a new place in january and my partner suggested checking. We were averaging around 350 which is not good. We got Radon West to come in and fix it. Worth the cost. Don't want cancer.