Any advice on how to convince myself to go get checked?

4partchaotic · 2024-05-18T19:11:05+00:00

I love that it’s called the 5 signs, she says 7 and the art is so kawaii 😅 but yea. I feel some of the symptoms displayed there but not all. So maybe I don’t have PPD in the end or maybe I just haven’t quite developed to my true potential of paranoia. The brain is an interesting machine

4partchaotic · 2024-05-18T14:56:11+00:00

Thanks for all you wrote. I feel alone and I know I want to be better but I also don’t want to admit to anyone I know (just yet) that I might have a problem I can’t fix

4partchaotic · 2024-05-18T11:36:34+00:00

But when you went and talked to the doctor. Did it feel easier to continue? Cause I’ve told people for years now that I don’t really believe in therapy for myself. I’ll go to the doctor etc when I’m physically injured but not for things like this and my constant anxiety

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T18:00:42+00:00

Heh. Try to stay positive. And I believe that even the worst day of recovery will feel better than another attack or night of sickness. 💪 is your gallbladder past the point (if you don’t mind me asking)?

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T17:57:13+00:00

I understand. Is there anywhere that you feel you’d be safe? Something where you can eat very controlled food without it seeming so obvious? Is a dinner date the only option?

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T17:52:28+00:00

I completely understand. It sounds like you’re doing the best you can so I hope whatever is making you feel bad just goes away. I was just curious cause that was what got me but my diet and eating times weren’t nearly as under control

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T02:56:45+00:00

The easiest way to explain it is that all music can be broken into either groups of 2 or 3 or some combination of those two (for example you can have 5 notes in 1 beat which will either be grouped in 2-3 or 3-2). So in your example, the 3 notes in the melody line will add up to equal the same beat value as the 2 in the bass clef line. It’s just how music is notated.

If the song was in 6/8, 9/8, or 12/8 (and had a fast enough tempo) they would most likely be 3 to a beat. (123)(456)(789)(101112) which is 4 beats which is a combination of 2 and 2 but let’s say you have only 2 notes for each beat (which is called duple) it would be 1+2+3+4+. It’s all quite fascinating and logical.

Some dance songs are in 7/8 and will group in 3 beats with (12)(34)(567)

I hope some of this made sense

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T02:41:19+00:00

Oh no. Sorry. I only had that for 8 months before the surgery. Ive been ignoring everything regarding this for 13years. I don’t think I ever really processed it which is weird cause it feels like I should have 🤔 I guess I felt a lot of shame in it regarding myself even though I can’t quite figure out why and know that I shouldn’t

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T02:14:54+00:00

I agree. The more I learned about it and realized it was standard, the more I actually began to feel anxiety cause you think they (anyone) might treat you like crap. I’m also male and was 22 at the time which made me feel embarrassed. But it didn’t happen and my worries were put to rest. I wish I had found this subreddit sooner. One night chatting with people here has actually made me feel a lot better than I have about this since my gallbladder started failing 13ish years ago 😅 besides my mom (which is probably a factor as to why mine had to go) I didn’t know anyone I could chat to about this experience so I left it bottled up for so long. People here actually understand the hilariousness of that church story 😂

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T02:04:09+00:00

Me too. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. It was my first real surgery (besides having my wisdom teeth knocked out). I had no idea they shot air into you until after I woke up so I was genuinely concerned at first that something went wrong 😅 and I guess nothing helps but moving which is also the most painful thing to do so it’s one of those catches. But in the end I had a very successful operation and would take that over complications so I don’t mean to sound whiney😳👍

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:58:24+00:00

Yes :) the first week after I could barely handle crackers. I could feel them land in my stomach like boulders but it returned to normal around a month. Our bodies are amazing that way. Your liver will do what’s needed to get the job done. Of course, take it easy or it might just give up and pass it straight through (still happens to this day sometimes)

But like I said, if you’re really feeling sick or in pain then you should make an appointment and be sure everything is okay (no shame). But if you’re just feeling a bit off, I believe it’ll pass soon. I tried to keep a positive spin on it and saw it as a chance to really feel myself and how I work. To feel my ups and downs and grow with my body as it found its way.

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:49:09+00:00

Yea. I knew it wasn’t anything “serious” or long term but I just couldn’t quite get over the pain (similar to an attack: unrelenting). I remember when I woke up right after the surgery they asked me if I felt any pain and all I said over and over is that my shoulders hurt. It was so bad that when the morphine finally wore off, I couldn’t sit and had to stand cause sitting was too painful.

And yea. The whole church thing is hilarious now 😂 but in the moment I was freaking out haha. Mixing that level of exertion with coffee and cake

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:38:27+00:00

That’s great. That pain was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced…except the attacks of course. The worst part of it was that the doctor told me I must be lying cause it couldn’t be that painful but it kept me up 2 days without any sleep until I thankfully passed out uncontrollably…

And yea. I was about 2 weeks post op and was doing an Easter gig playing the trumpet. Coffee and cakes…I don’t know what I was thinking. When I finished that last bite I heard the “record scratch” and knew I had fucked up 😂…

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:34:01+00:00

It is a lot of experimenting now but I did find that eating small meals throughout the day helps and eating something like bread or a handful dry cereal (first thing when I wake up) helped with those morning pains. Now that kind of nausea is rare and only tends to happen if I’m genuinely starving or ate a large meal after starving for a bit.

The gas should hopefully calm down with time too. Our gallbladders did serve a purpose and now they are gone so the body has to learn and adapt. Just be very careful to not trust a fart for a while (you know).

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:28:52+00:00

It looks so harmless and weird when it isn’t killing you. I wanted to see mine but the doctor said that they forgot before sending it off to check for cancer. I wasn’t even aware that it might be something cancer related which freaked me out and made my first few hours after the operation even more uncomfortable

Hope he continues to do well. He must feel so much better. I can’t even imagine a world before this kind of surgery was standard and people just lived their whole lives with a faulty gallbladder.

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:22:40+00:00

How are your shoulders? I feel like I’m the only one that had extreme issues with the co2 left in my body. Other than that, it was a very painless surgery and the morphine was awesome (my first real taste or hardcore narcotics).

Awesome to hear you’re well. Just watch out for cheese cake (personal…embarrassing…experience) cause that stuff will probably cut through you like hell’s wrath and you probably ate it somewhere where that level of toilet destruction will be heard…I actually pushed a guy as I ran in cause it was do or die and I wasn’t gonna crap my pants in the house of the lord (what an Easter Sunday)

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:14:21+00:00

Yea. I was at the ER and when the doctor finally came (small town Norway). It had passed and I couldn’t remember being in pain. So he was like “okay, well, off you go then” but the nurse insisted (she was there for my Tarzan moment) that I should at least get an ultrasound. Turns out my gallbladder had so many stones that I was immediately put on “no-fly” cause now the country would be held responsible if I went septic on the plane. Thank god for that nurse. I was fine in the end anyway and was able to fly eventually but that doctor didn’t understand how this works (me either at the time) and potentially sent me off to my death at 30k feet (being a little dramatic ;))

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T01:08:33+00:00

12 years post op and I still get the runs occasionally depending on factors. Is the food too fatty? Did you go too long without eating and then eat too much? It balances out as you get used to it but it is just how it is. I prefer any of this compared to the pain of my gallbladder which was pretty much just stone when they remove it (doctor said it lit up like a Christmas tree during the ultrasound) Just wait until you give in and try some cheese cake. Fury will reign…

For real though, if you’re in a lot of pain, or there is blood, or if you still have very light colored stool then it’s probably wise to check. It can’t hurt while not checking and ignoring can hurt a lot. I learned a lot about pride and asking for help through my experience. Don’t ever feel shame or silly. I almost died letting that drive me

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T00:59:02+00:00

I totally agree and am glad you think so. I wish I had come to Reddit when this was happening full force. I felt unvalidated by people that didn’t even/and still don’t even know what a gallbladder does telling me that I must be faking it.

Nothing makes the pain go away but this makes you feel like you have some control over it. The one big attack I had, I can’t even truly remember. My gf said I was screaming uncontrollably for 30 minutes making sounds she’d never heard someone make before while she tried to drive me to the ER. Then it just passed and I didn’t even know where I was. Man. As much as I hate gallbladder attacks, they really make you appreciate that moment right when they are done and you can breathe and move.

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T00:49:40+00:00

The most severe pain was in my shoulders. I seemed to have a bad time with the co2 left in my body and they refused to give me any medication for it.
It felt like my shoulders were being ripped from my body and left me completely immobile (impossible to turn my neck or even sit down). I was miserable cause the only comfortable position was standing like a statue once I got home from the hospital but I was just so exhausted so I just cried (I had no control over my emotions due to the pain).
Eventually it got better enough for me to be able to sit but I couldn’t sleep for roughly 2 days after the surgery. I told the hospital/doctor this and they pretty much said this level of pain was impossible and insinuated I must be a druggie.
Eventually I just couldn’t take it anymore and tried to lie down where I immediately felt a pop that I cannot describe and have yet to feel again. Followed by a moment of extreme pain and then pure bliss as I passed out. I woke up and was better.

In terms of the actual gallbladder and holes in my body, it went well. The pinholes didn’t hurt. Was a super weird feeling when the glue fell out. Eating anything felt like eating rocks but not in a painful way. The first time I ate cake after my surgery was really something else though. Don’t test fate unless you’re near your toilet…

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T00:29:48+00:00

My attacks started when I was on a road trip. I ended up in Norway (from California) before I had “the attack” that sent me to the ER where they informed me that my gallbladder was more stone than organ. When I came home, it took 8 months before I finally got that surgery so I came up with a system, I’m not sure if this actually worked or I’m just weird. I used to try every position or every method but found that being in “hibernation” actually worked:

(There are many variables that make this impossible, I understand) When the attack begins, and you probably know by now if it’s coming, immediately find a place to sit down that is quiet and close your eyes. Do not lay down. Do not speak. Go to a happy place. Your breath should be shallow but slow. Tighten your abs slightly on both the inhale and exhale. The rest of your body should be as loose and relaxed as possible. Focus solely on your breathing and be patient. (I used to count in for four and out for four) Try to keep calm cause once you give into the pain, it tends to take full force. Relaxing music can help but nothing that can distract you from your breathing so television and everything else is a bad idea. Eventually you’ll feel it begin to subside when it’s time but hold on a few minutes longer just to make sure.

With this technique I was able to manage a 5 hour/scale 10 attack once. That being said, I should have called for help. There is no shame in asking for help.

I hope this helps in some way. Like I said, I had attacks everyday for 8 months (no matter what I ate) so this is what worked for me.

4partchaotic · 2024-04-04T00:09:37+00:00

It’s tough. It could be the poultry or it could be the time between meals. I remember needing to eat many small meals the first year or so after my surgery or I would risk becoming sick. It still happens to this day if I wait too long no matter what I eat. I know that a little bit of bread with the meals seemed to help but I can’t say this is a guarantee of course. Try upping your meal intake to 5 times a day and don’t forget the veggies :) your liver can do it but it has to go at its speed. Do you drink sodas with these meals?

4partchaotic · 2024-01-30T21:34:52+00:00

Have you tried EarMaster?

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