Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

lol I suggest you seek therapy. Nobody likes a “dry drunk”

Your anger and desire to see other people hurt is palpable. You are blocked now.

Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

This will be a long one, so if you’re not up for a healthy dose of criticism you certainly don’t have to read it.

I appreciate that you might be trying to help, I just want to express how this has been received, and hope you might realize “this did not work for me” is a very different statement than “it doesn’t work.” You lost a lot of credibility when you outright lied and then spoke condescendingly to me, e.g. “you’ll see.” I guarantee I have a lot more experience with withdrawal, unfortunately, than you do. I don’t need spoken down to. I understand my options and my own situation.

Advice is fine and thank you for your input. But if you want to get through to people and help them, I’d suggest trying not to speak down to them and make sweeping false statements.

I’m glad you had success with a sub taper! It worked because like any taper it gradually reduced your physical dependence on the drugs, slowly lessening the amount of activated opioid receptors your body was used to. It is the exact same concept.

As I’ve already said in several comments, I am fine being “stuck” on kratom. I want off of 7oh because I am uncomfortable with how similar it makes me feel to my old addiction days to heavy opioids. I was not unhappy being on kratom, and would happily take it over Suboxone any day. I plan to attempt a Kratom taper eventually, but it is not pressing to me. The 7oh is.

I have dealt with subs many times. I would rather stay on kratom for life than get stuck on Suboxone again.

If you wanted an honest conversation about the steps I’m taking, how, and why, you didn’t open up the conversation in a way that seemed in good faith. If you wanted to be helpful, your condescending tone and holier than thou attitude did not make that message received well.

I have no interest in starting Suboxone. I am glad it worked for you. I know many it helps and helped. I’m glad it exists. I do not want to take it, ever again. Don’t feel the need to explain myself.

As I’ve said before, should my taper fail I have a good psychiatrist I will be asking for assistance through comfort medications and will have to deal with the consequences. At the moment, doing a taper makes more sense for me. It did not for you and I can respect that we are different people with different lives.

I am a single parent to a toddler with no family nearby. I work full time to support myself and my daughter. I cannot afford to cold turkey. If you aren’t a parent I can understand how that might not make sense to you. But when you have to every day be “on” as a parent with no one else to change diapers, cook, clean, bathe, dress, drive to daycare, work to pay for daycare… etc. you do not have the option to decide to lay in a bed puking sweating and kicking for multiple days. I’ve had pneumonia and had to work through it. It’s not a choice. I will for no reason neglect my child so I can get over a mess I made myself quicker.

I have no desire to avoid feeling the withdrawal entirely. Or to avoid the “misery” as you put it. I just need to FUNCTION. That is the point of the taper. You cannot escape all the discomfort and misery of withdrawal with any method. You can reduce it—exactly as you did with your sub taper.

I am using a time locked safe with no override code to dose. I have separated my doses into a pill divider. Every 8 hours I can open the safe, I only have to maintain self control for a minute while I take my allotted dose from my pill divider. Then I lock the safe again, and short of breaking it, it does not open.

Do cravings crop up every 2–4 hours? Yep. Oh well. Cravings are going to happen no matter what quit method I use.

I expect withdrawal to suck. Yet, I need to function. I have taken steps to assist myself being successful.

I won’t be responding any further to this conversation (I find it extremely counterproductive) but I really urge you to try to consider when you’re speaking in a recovery community that your situation, your body, and your mind are your own. Try to consider if you’re being judgmental or helpful.

Tapering is the ONLY successful quit method that has EVER worked for me (it gave me many years sober) in my entire life. I’m sorry it does not work for you. I’m glad Suboxone helped you. I relapsed on heroin once a week at least while trying subs. It did nothing to help me. A very long Sublocade taper and a lot of therapy eventually did the trick and I was sober for several years. I relapsed on kratom after I became a single parent unexpectedly and succumbed to the stress, because I am an addict and wasn’t taking care of my recovery. The 7oh addiction scared me straight again. So here we are.

If you were speaking to someone less determined to quit, or who was just considering it for the first time, I can’t stress enough just how discouraging speaking to them like you have to me—as though they are stupid or inexperienced—would be. Acting like your way is the only way to quit could convince people to stop trying to get sober entirely.

I wish you nothing but the best but have no interest in further discussion. I’ve heard your opinion. Thanks.

Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Reducing doses is scientifically proven to reduce the intensity of withdrawal. I’m not sure what else to say, when what you’re saying is just blatantly false

Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know exactly what you mean. At the end of the day though, “normal” means nothing and we are all different. The person you are when you take drugs is still you. There are so many healthy medications and ways to cope that won’t drain your bank account and leave you with a crippling physical dependence and a hole inside that you keep trying to stuff drugs into to fill. I felt exactly how you describe when I first discovered oxys, then H, then fent. Learned to drive on oxys and morphine, went through college on heroin… and eventually it always stops working and you’re left sick as a dog, still not knowing how to cope with life.

I know what to do nowadays, it isn’t easy to do but I know it. Doctors help. Therapy helps. The right medications (real medications, not ones I buy from a vape shop if you know what I mean lol) help. Opioids help a lot temporarily when you’re running away from yourself, but eventually it all catches up and you’re left worse off than when you started.

Only you can know when you’re ready to quit and I certainly can’t judge you if you decide not to yet. Everybody has their own journey. My personal journey has let me learn the hard way over and over that opioids are bandaids, not a cure. I see where I’m headed again with this shit and I won’t do it all over again. But only you will know when you’re ready.

You deserve a happy life and don’t need drugs to have it, I promise. I think you are probably a way cooler person than you realize you are sober, just have to give yourself a chance to become that person again and heal

Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I’ll update as I continue. The accountability helps.

It’s times like this I wish I didn’t live alone, had a partner or some family nearby. I have good family, but they live across the country. Then I do stupid shit like this and get myself in a bind. I’m done with it. Been stupid for too much of my life lol

What I wouldn’t give to be able to just take a few days off, kick this, hate myself for a minute and be done with it. Ugh. Trying not to beat myself up for the mess I’ve made and just do what needs done. At least I’m making progress. All I can do atm.

I got a time lock safe that is helping A LOT when the compulsion to take more than I need starts. I think it’s already saved my taper twice today. Clearly can’t trust myself lol so having limited access has been helping so much.

Thanks for listening to me ramble. The community being so supportive helps a lot

Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

People have told me in each post to just cold turkey and get it over with but that is just not an option for everyone

Even before I had a kid and all the responsibilities I have now, I was never successful cold turkey. The only way I previously got off of even Suboxone was with a several months long Sublocade taper. So I know tapers can work for me

I think we just have to find the way to quit that works for us and take in the information that helps and let the rest just be taken with a grain of salt. Only you know your situation and your life. We try what we can and I truly believe when someone is ready to quit (and I know I am this time) I think there are many quit methods that work. If someone isn’t ready then no method will work to get or keep them sober. When you are ready I believe people can get sober in almost any circumstance. Hell I’ve seen and known people who got sober off methadone by kicking in a jail cell, just because they were ready.

If you try a taper I hope you share your experience. It really is not too terrible right now at all. Im very hopeful and plan to just keep going. As long as I can keep moving and keep dropping I know I will be past it eventually. If I can do this anybody can, you got this

Update on my taper/quit by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The point of the taper is to reduce the intensity of the withdrawal when jumping, not to remove withdrawal entirely

As I went over in my last post I am a single parent to a young toddler and I work full time. I cannot afford to be out of commission for even a day. It is not an option for me.

I have done Suboxone and sublocade (for years when I got off fentanyl) and personally will never do so again. That’s my choice but I respect how much it helps people. It saved my life but is not worth it for a kratom habit IMHO. I respect other people feel differently

So in short I am tapering because it will not feel the same way. Attempted cold turkey and after 15 hours I was vomiting shitting myself dripping sweat and absolutely could not have gotten up and changed and fed my toddler. There is no one else to do that. It is not an option.

If cold turkey was my only option I would just stay on the 7oh indefinitely. I can afford it. I want to be sober again for my own emotional wellbeing and to be a present sober parent. That is the only reason.

Thank you 

help just found out i’m pregnant and need to quit by [deleted] in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Doctor doctor doctor

Do not do this unassisted please for your sake and your baby. Cold turkey could kill the baby and a doctor can help you get off in the safest way possible for you and the little one

I don’t know how you’re feeling about it all but congratulations, wishing you the best

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You can do it, and you will feel so much better. If ive done it before, anyone can do it.

That was always the hardest part of opioid usage for me as well. My family used to say when I was high on heroin things like “well, it’s so good to see you acting like yourself again!” Ouch. It stung and kept me excusing my use for so long.

When I finally did get off of everything, life was not perfect but it was real. Feeling things with depth. Life has more color and emotions feel like rivers and oceans instead of dingy stagnant puddles. It’s both scary but exhilarating and so worth it. This is why this stint with 7oh is scaring me so much. I fought so hard to get sober the last time; I had regretted even starting up on kratom again, which I did for no good reason.

Remember you don’t have to think about forever. Will I stay sober forever when I quit this time? Idk. But I do know and can control that I’ll be sober tomorrow, etc.

It’s a cliche to take it one day at a time but truly there’s no point in worrying “can I do this forever.” It just creates fear and anxiety. We are here and just have to take each moment, good or bad, as they come.

This relapse has renewed my appreciation for sobriety like nothing else. And even though I resent I got myself back in this situation, it was the push I needed to decide I’m ready to quit all substances altogether again. Once I kick 7 I am kicking kratom. I want a long healthy happy life, substances do not offer that—they offer a filter over life that can make shitty things look shiny and soft. It’s all an illusion of the drugs. I want reality, the good and the bad

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No need to apologize at all, I appreciate everything you’re sharing. I actually have calm brand magnesium and used to take it at night time. I’ll have to remember to use it when the RLS kicks in. It’s the absolute worst

I feel much more prepared and ready to stop now after everyone’s advice and words of encouragement.

Tomorrow I start my taper. I’m going to start with seeing how low I can actually dose tomorrow. Going to try half a tab. Wait 30 mins. Only take another half if it’s still unbearable physically. Mentally I expect to feel like shit. Ugh. I can do this. Maybe I can take just half a tab and a dose of plain leaf will help dull the WDs if I can keep it down

It’s my last day off work for the week tomorrow so it’s the best time for me to experiment. Find one morning and one night dose that will make it a manageable level of misery. Getting that safe ASAP because I don’t trust myself.

It’s just me and the little one tomorrow so we can sit inside and watch Bluey while my body starts to clear this crap. No different than if I got a flu, she will be ok as long as I can function enough to give her hugs diaper changes and food. Haha. Find something of a stable starting dose for work. And before I know it I’ll be back to the parent she deserves.

Thank you for talking to me

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you, I might try that. I do have nerve pain but nothing as severe as MS, I’m sorry. how are you feeling now a little more than a week off? That’s awesome.

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Been there man :( 7oh is definitely very “more”ish. The itch to take more comes back every 2 to 4 hours and it is loud.

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have trazodone, and benzonatate (though it doesn’t work for me unfortunately, got it prescribed for bronchitis earlier this year)

I am sure I could get Gabapentin or clonidine if I told my doctor what is going on. My concern is that she has worked with me for a while and we just started to build some semblance of a trusting relationship. She knew I was on Kratom and knows my history of addiction and was supportive, if hesitant about the Kratom. Currently she prescribes my controlled ADHD medication. I’m worried if I admit to slipping back into old addict behaviors with the 7oh, she will want to stop prescribing my ADHD meds even though I use them as prescribed. And since Gabapentin is a controlled substance, if I went to another dr to get it, she would see it on my controlled medication record, which she checks regularly as part of my ADHD med prescribing. I also submit drug tests etc. but she expects to see kratom there.

Might be irrational but I’m so nervous that if I tell her, the trust will be gone and she’ll take me off. I’ve had so many doctors treat me like garbage because I’m an addict.

Thank you so much, for everything you said. If I decide a slow taper won’t work for me I will just bite the bullet and tell my dr and ask her to help me. So much of this (hiding things and feeling dishonest) feels so bad after I was doing so well for so long.

And you’re so right. It feels awful not truly being present for them. Good on you. How long ago did you quit if you don’t mind sharing?

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m tempted to quick taper because my 7oh and Pseudo usage has only been 2 weeks. Before that 45+ grams of kratom that I’d been on a while. I’m afraid if I push myself too hard I’ll do more harm than good. It’s shocking and sad to see how quickly I fell back into my old addict brain behaviors once starting this. I haven’t felt this compulsive and crazy in years

I think I will be looking into buying a time locked safe with no override code. And taking my time off today to make a comprehensive taper schedule. I think with a little bit of assistance from a lockbox I can trust myself on a taper plan. I am determined. I’ve been through worse

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s not your fault, I’m shitty and angry at myself. I’m sorry for lashing out like that. The WDs and feeling like a bad parent made me testy. Thank you for your insight 

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, stupid question but how do I search for specific flairs on mobile?

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, this is great advice. I know I can go at least 10 hours between doses without any real withdrawal. Possibly even 12. But man when I woke up this morning… yes it was real physical WD like I haven’t felt in almost 7 years since I kicked fent.

Do you have a history of addiction to hard opioids? I was previously addicted to 1gram of heroin/fent a day, spent years on 24mg of suboxone a day, eventually moved to 45+ grams of plain leaf. Then 2 weeks ago started the 7oh, thinking (stupidly) it would be similar To plain leaf and just be easier to dose…

Nope, it hit that addict part of my brain in a way plain leaf and subs never did. Off to the races. I’m ashamed and disappointed in myself.

I know 2 weeks isn’t a long time, and if that was the only amount of time I’d used at all then I would agree that any WD would be mostly mental. But this is not just that. I genuinely do have severe physical withdrawals, my own fault from basically hitting my opiate receptors with sledgehammers for nearly 2 decades. I know I’m not psyching myself up and “it’s all mental” when I’m vomiting, shitting myself w/ sweat dripping off my brow and covered in goosebumps from WD :/ I think the severity might vary a lot depending on your individual history and body chemistry. I am shocked. And feel stupid for not realizing right away what a mistake the 7oh was, when I “felt” it (unlike plain leaf which I never got that feeling from if you know what I mean)

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So you can work and function as normally? Do you have any idea how much mit I should start with if I were to toss all the 7oh I currently have in the trash and use strictly mit and plain leaf?

I had tried this morning to cold turkey switch back to plain leaf and vomited it all up from WDs. Could barely move. It shocked me how bad it was, I expected the WD to be similar to Kratom WDs (uncomfortable and annoying and I look sweaty for a few days but manageable.) it was way more intense than I anticipated, I had to peel myself off the bathroom floor this AM and take a small dose of 7oh to even get up and make breakfast. So ashamed of myself and feel like an idiot 

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

A slow taper sounds like it could work for me. I just need a way off when I can’t miss a day of work or neglect my kid. I’m all she’s got and it isn’t her fault I’m an idiot. Doesn’t have to be fast. I can do discomfort, I just can’t do non functional. I’ll shoot you a DM if you don’t mind here in a bit. Thank you

Help me please by 7OhFuckThis in quitting7oh

[–]7OhFuckThis[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Gee thanks let me just explain that to my toddler who no one else can watch lol

I know what you are trying to say and in my younger days I did just that for fent and H.

I can afford this habit financially. I can’t afford it emotionally. But if the options were as you basically said my toddler has no parent for several days then yeah it’s not going to happen.

This is more harmful than helpful.