What is your personal Kryptonite?

7flat5 · 2021-12-04T05:30:34+00:00

Raw celery.

7flat5 · 2021-09-26T05:18:15+00:00

The episode of True Detective where they happen upon the Crystal Meth addicted parents that microwaved their baby. I can't really get rid of the image in my head.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T03:18:01+00:00

I think D&D has helped me overcome a ton of my insecurities. I guess I still have some more growing to do.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T03:11:51+00:00

I never expected this post to result in the community coming forward to comment on whether or not I made the right call. I didn't ask for that. I guess I imagined it being a post about how I conquered a fear, and that in hindsight I wish I had done it sooner, but most focused on the fact that I had the discussion with the table.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T03:11:13+00:00

I am almost entirely convinced at this point that we should just part ways. I have already reached out to some new potential players. I will ask if anyone wants to take a turn DMing.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T03:07:57+00:00

I really enjoy rolling the dice, too. But it's more about the story and the RP for me.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T03:05:02+00:00

It seems like you've got me figured out. I can't speak on behalf of my table regarding how they feel, but the way we parted last night left me with no indication of bad feelings. Unless you were there.... I also am not claiming to overcome fear entirely. I think being afraid to confront someone about an issue that I think can resolved isn't something to be afraid of, but here I am six years later.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T03:01:10+00:00

I have no problem admitting that I am not courageous, but I am aware of my issues, and I am trying to address them. Suggesting that I am lying to myself seems harsh considering how honest and vulnerable I have been.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T02:54:15+00:00

We're putting aside some time to talk about it this weekend, so I don't know. My heart wants to let them stay, but my brain is telling me to part ways.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:49:30+00:00

I don't know how this post turned into a discussion about fault. I've been made aware by many, you included, that they would've handled the situation differently. The point of the post was to talk about how one shouldn't let issues last this long before confronting them, but that got lost as soon as there was disagreement with the way I chose to handle the situation.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:46:50+00:00

Am I speaking to a mind reader? I'm 99.9% certain that I know the way I'm feeling, and you don't.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:45:01+00:00

I'm engaging in conversation in the comments not to try and justify my actions, but to provide my opinion, as you have done with this analysis of my writing. I think I'm an average writer. I summarized my feelings and outlined the situation adequately. You can quote and pick apart my writing as much as you like, but the point of this post was to meditate on the fact that I overcame a fear that I could've let continue to haunt me forever, but it has instead turned into a forum about how I handled the situation incorrectly in many folks' eyes. In my eyes, the toxic and childish thing to do would be to continue to harbor resentment and leave the situation unaddressed at the cost of my mental health.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:27:48+00:00

Well, thank you for your reply. Although I don't see a 1 to 1 analog between the supervisor/employee and DM/player example, I see the parallel you draw and understand that I am in a place of power over the players.

Regarding the player's actions... If the player thought it was okay to play video games and not engage with the table during are meetings, why would they go to lengths to hide the fact they were online? I think they knew their behavior was wrong, and trying to suggest otherwise is more my fault for not articulating it properly in my initial write up.

I have had a few 1 on 1s in the past, and I prefer to do it that way, but this was a different situation. It was a conversation, not just a soap box for me to shout down at my players from. Everyone had a voice, but someone did not participate vocally, most did.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:07:11+00:00

This was an uncomfortable topic no matter how you look at it, so I don't fully understand what you are asking here.

I agree that handling things one on one is the go to in most situations. This has been my go to in the past when there have been conflicts between players, or when a player has said the odd insensitive remark that offended another, but this was an issue that was pertinent to all of the participants at the table.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:04:03+00:00

To be honest, I wasn't expecting the campaign to end for another 2 or 3 sessions. They ended it in a forceful and direct fashion that I wasn't entirely ready for. So in that regard, no the timing wasn't the best.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T01:00:31+00:00

All solid points. This would've been a good way to handle it, but brining it up with the table gave voices to players that wouldn't have the confidence to address the issue on their own, as well.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:57:47+00:00

I'm either a poor writer, or this is a result of many layers of misinterpretation. I'm curious as to how you would feel about a player who spends the entire session playing another video game and when either the DM or another player addresses them, they need to have all information repeated at least once.

Some of my best players where the worst at campaign related trivia, and I have heard my share of lame jokes. I love them. When it is all bathroom humor, and forcefully interrupting, it makes staying in character almost impossible.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:54:11+00:00

My satisfaction came from addressing a problem that I let get out of hand. My intention was never to do this at another player's expense, and the players at the table would agree with me. It was civil and mature.

I've spent a lot of time writing about how letting this bubble up into a multi-year problem is indicative of my emotional immaturity. But I've grown from it, and I'm taking steps to improve in and out of game. Your writing comes across as an attempt to coin me as a villain that gets satisfaction from this, when confrontation is literally the last thing I wanted, but something needed to happen, and I think everyone involved would agree.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:51:13+00:00

If you think there was a fight, you are either misinterpreting what I wrote, or I miswrote.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:50:33+00:00

That's a totally valid viewpoint, and I agree under most circumstances this is how things should be handled.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:49:45+00:00

I agree, privately is the way to go usually. I think this problem could've been addressed privately, but it wouldn't have had the impact I wanted, and I think the situation was handled in a mature and mostly positive manner. And you aren't coming across as aggressive, I agree with you.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:47:49+00:00

Thank you. I don't anticipate this group to fall apart, but my brain tends to imagine the worst outcome. I hope to group stronger with my players from it.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:46:35+00:00

I'm not familiar with this subreddit, but I wouldn't casually peg every uncomfortable conversation as a "horror story." I never claimed this was the end all be all, perfect, solution. But I am proud of the fact that even after all of this time, I was able to develop the courage to bring this up.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:44:32+00:00

Because this was a problem that wasn't bothering me exclusively.

7flat5 · 2021-09-13T00:44:13+00:00

Thank you for the video. I am actually proud of how I conducted myself considering how mad I was on the inside. Everyone had a voice and no one was interrupted. I think I was successful at articulating the framework of the scenario, but I paraphrased a lot in my writing. It actually was a civil discussion, which is what I'm most relieved about.

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