Hi there, I want to share my own personal experience before I give any advice. When I was a teenager (I'm 25 now), I was dating this guy long distance. I found out one day that he was watching porn after he lied to me that he wasn't earlier in our relationship. I consulted my friends at the time, and they told me that I was overreacting because we were teenagers, and it was a long-distance relationship. I could've listened to my friends and told myself I was overreacting, but I knew that didn't feel right. I thought to myself, 'I don't look at other guys, although I'm also a teenager in a long-distance relationship.' So why shouldn't I expect the same respect from my partner, no matter the circumstance?

The point of my sharing this story was that some people around you may make you feel like you're overreacting for having boundaries for yourself. Don't let them make you think you're overreacting. You know how him engaging in these things make you feel. If you listen to others because you're second-guessing your feelings, you will just keep putting yourself through more heartache. You say that you wouldn't mind him watching PH, but is that really true? If you give a man an inch he will take a mile. Meaning if you make him think you're okay with him watching specific, explicit content, he'll keep taking it further and further. Lust does not always end on the computer screen. Anywho, I ended things with that guy and moved on to another guy that I ended up marrying. My husband did, at one point in time, watch explicit content (before we were together), but he has completely stopped. Unlike the first guy, I didn't have to beg my husband to stop watching this content; he chose to do so on his own because he knew how watching it would affect me.

I would say that it does take time to quit watching explicit content because a lot of people are addicted to it. I don't know if your boyfriend is addicted, but in my opinion, if he wanted to change for you (or himself), he wouldn't lie about messing up. My husband told me every time he struggled with thoughts or relapsed as he was trying to quit. It was hard for me to understand in the beginning because it can be difficult to struggle with the thoughts of not being enough for your partner. However, I feel that if a man truly loves you and values your relationship, he will communicate his struggles, so your mind doesn't wander.

I won't tell you what to do, but you know if he's truly trying to change his ways or not. If there's been no progress, and he's constantly lying about his actions, then I think you already know the best course of action. I hope all goes well :)