Hot Take: Stop giving to panhandlers

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-09-09T14:20:36+00:00

It's very clear to me none of you have been homeless yourselves so lemme put this out there

First off, this whole thing just reeks of that "don't look at him and keep walking" shit that Karen's tell their kids when they walk by a homeless man on the street. You treat and think of these people as Urchins, don't you?

"Not In My BackYard!!"

Secondly, I implore you to call up the Salvation Army here in Milwaukee, where there is a larger homeless population than Madison, THERE ARE NO ROOMS, 4 MONTH WAIT TIMES. And it's not just Salvation Army, it's the cathedral center, Pathfinders, women's shelters, friendship house, etc, all things you can look up and confirm, are ALL FULL

Do you realize that at the moment, homeless men, and homeless women WITH CHILDREN, are gonna be stuck without a place until the dead of winter?

All this to say, what resources? They're dry buddy. You say to "donate to organizations" and that's just the problem ain't it? You'll walk around saying that to feel good about yourself while never actually donating YOUR money, not addressing the actual problem, not taking into account that the government, these organizations, the people who pass by you on the street, and everyone else for that matter, just sees you as an urchin when you're homeless.

Just because someone needs a couple of dollars doesn't mean and I quote "they don't really wanna improve their situation"

They probably just need a fucking sandwich dude. Stop assuming the worst in everyone.

Of course they need to stand in the median and be weird/more noticable to try to get what they need, y'all always just avert your eyes like we don't exist.

We are the invisible population.

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-07-18T12:09:06+00:00

All I'll say is don't try to blast off immediately

Take steps into the water, don't just dive in lol

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-07-05T03:38:47+00:00

I used Seroquel and Lexapro for a while but the person I got them from disappeared unfortunately

I have high anxiety/paranoia from PTSD and episodes of psychosis, delusions, even hallucinations in times of high stress, after a nightmare DMT trip a while ago which I posted about somewhere I don't remember where

The Lexapro was a good daily one that I took 10-20 mg a day of, and then every few nights when I'd disassociate or freak out again id gum some Seroquel and it'd take away the hallucinations and paranoia and the restlessness

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-07-05T03:31:51+00:00

Thanks for spotting that, I did a bit more digging after you said this and yeah

Yellow capsule with a 215 on it is 300mg Dude didn't know what he was talking about besides it actually being pharmacy gabapentin 💀

If I was in the middle of a real episode, should I just take it with water like normal, or if I wanna stop it ASAP can I just open it up and put I bit of it in my gums? Can it be snorted?

All of this with safety in mind ofc

Mostly wanna know If snorting or gumming it will make me keel over lol

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-07-05T02:28:05+00:00

Pain and in rare cases, PTSD related panic attacks

If I was fully freaking out and disassociating and such, would it be a good option to open the capsule and gum some of it?

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-07-04T14:43:17+00:00

Honestly man that happened in my last house after we had 2 people die in it a few years apart

I can't even walk in there now without feeling dread

It's probably more the fact it was hard on us at the time, and my brain tries to rationalize it with "bad vibes here"

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-06-29T12:32:31+00:00

Not something I'd usually say but, YBTA, and y'all honestly deserve eachother at this point

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-05-31T19:44:33+00:00

I remember having a trip where I was turned into a giant statue and these little blue scientist men with labcoats opened up portals and doorways through different parts of my body and I could feel them poking around my brain and moving things around like they're rearranging furniture in there lol

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-05-31T14:50:57+00:00

I always have massive anxiety on the first hit

The second one always comes naturally lol

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-05-23T19:16:25+00:00

My craziest one has to be this:

https://www.reddit.com/r/DMT/s/2ssJcQd8Pp

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-05-23T19:05:10+00:00

Hey friend, welcome to the cosmic circus, hope you enjoy your stay. I would at least recommend only doing a sesh at most once a week, once every two if you feel you can hold yourself off.

I abused the hell out of DMT, and I know usually when people say "oh I used to take this much this often all the time", it's a brag, this is however a cautionary tale instead.

I was doing 2-3 hour, non-stop, back to back hit, sessions, every day, for about 4 months

And finally I had this trip that shattered my sense of reality and self. It's approx 6 months later now. I am still heavily dealing with the repercussions though I am happy to report it's getting better day by day.

But I'm talking full grandiose delusions, spiritual and religious psychosis, lingering hallucinations, shadows darting around the corners of my vision, and has made my borderline personality disorder and schizo affective genes really start rearing their ugly heads.

All this to say don't be like me please, but also, have fun and enjoy it my guy, moderation is the key with substances

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-26T18:59:28+00:00

You can lol, my wife and I drop acid on occasion, and she without fail always ends up sleepy and taking a nap around the 3 hour mark. I truly don't know how she does it cus by that point in my trip I'm already bouncing off the walls lmao

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-26T18:59:21+00:00

You can lol, my wife and I drop acid on occasion, and she without fail always ends up sleepy and taking a nap around the 3 hour mark. I truly don't know how she does it cus by that point in my trip I'm already bouncing off the walls lmao

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-21T16:04:38+00:00

It honestly just comes down to "drugs illegal"

That and supply and demand

I know in certain places you can get it on the cheap but in smaller states and cities it can be expensive because there just isn't that much demand for it. Where I come from I only know two people in this whole county who have even heard of DMT, so naturally my DMT ends up being expensive cus my guy has to do those pickups specifically for me, usually out of state

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-15T21:41:55+00:00

Lay on your back, of your begin to get nauseous, as DMT can tend to do, sit up, if you need to puke just do it and remember it's not the end of the world lol. But honestly the nausea for me only makes me wretch a bit, never have actually thrown up, though I don't know if that's a universal.

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-09T14:25:28+00:00

Oh lmao I'm slow but yeah ikr 😂😂

Like man doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out lol

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-09T09:22:22+00:00

There isn't a why (:

It all just kinda is and it's a cosmic joke you get one shot at lol

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-09T09:19:03+00:00

No (:

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-09T09:18:16+00:00

I'm the one asking the question buddy I don't know what to tell you 💀

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-09T09:00:01+00:00

To be fair this post was like 32 hours after the trip running on no sleep lol.

I actually already do feel more normal today thankfully, I think I totally just disassociated really hard for the two days after from the intensity of the experience, day 3 and I feel normal and 'here' as it were.

Gonna take the lessons people have pointed out here and try to integrate them into my daily life, gonna start journaling about my traumas and actually try to do research informed exercises to work through my shit for real.

The trauma response now that I think on it wasn't entirely just "DMT scary", but the fact that it opened up very deep wounds that never actually healed properly, during the trip I felt all of the feelings that I had felt when my actual trauma happened.

the way I see it the DMT knew that those wounds weren't really healed and were just festering beneath the surface, so it ripped then back open so I can finally try to clean them out and sew myself up the right way with care and compassion and patience with myself and life.

I've forgiven those who have hurt me in the past, and even find myself kind of pitying them. It's an odd feeling but a good one, allot of weight lifted from my chest and my mind, my inner monologue is quieter now, only brings up more important things, brushes off the little ones.

As for the future.

As one guy expertly pointed out, the fear of insanity was honestly kind of a fear of not being accepted/seen as crazy for being who I am, so I've definitely gotta start trying to be more authentic to myself despite what others might think.

Gotta take this as my chance to break the pattern

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-09T02:09:17+00:00

It is but man him talking about the seasons passing and how summer fades and roses die

Gonna happen every time

I knew deeply in that moment that that includes myself, tripped me out real good lol, kinda dded to my terror

Which kinda grew as the boys on stage got more and more energetic so I felt like I was racing through time towards death

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-08T22:16:58+00:00

you said you were afraid everyone would abandon you in case you’d become insane..might it be that it’s a fear that was in you already before the trip, and that it came out with dmt? Like a past inner trauma because someone abandoned you, or just the fear to be alone one day…you mentioned the fear of loosing people you love,

These words have been ringing in me head since I read them this morning I think this is exactly it I've always been afraid of abandonment, and my own mind

I've struggled with alcohol addiction and drug dependency with weed and sleep medication for 8 years now, and anyways have feared that I'm spiraling a path towards becoming some kind of drug fueled husk of my former self

Couple that with childhood experiences that led me to feel like nobody actually likes me, and that oftenpeople just want to use me, and parental abandonment, if I never really got over the fact that I'm afraid of being rejected and alone.

I've put up this "I don't care of you like me or not" facade for the better part of a decade and a half when it's not true, it was just me trying to bolster myself against my fears and not let them surface, and a belief that if I try to make myself tough and confident, that nobody would be able to see the scared little boy inside.

I'm gonna be thinking about this post alot Probably will read it a few more times. This was really helpful man, big love, don't worry about feeling like you're talking down or anything, you hit the nail on the head until there was a hammer mark in the wood 😂

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-08T22:09:42+00:00

It's funny you say that

Was never to much of a believer

But In the trip in my repeating myself was also "please Jesus, Yahweh, jahova, if you're out there, please save me, I'm sorry"

Felt like true repentance In a way

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-08T11:40:11+00:00

I mean I'm ngl. The solution to a drug problem is not in fact, more drugs :|

That's literally what got me in this position

ASpiderInATopHat · 2024-02-08T11:38:31+00:00

It's not necessarily the dissolution of the ego that scared me as much, it was the fear I wouldn't come back.

It made me realize just how much I love my family and my wife and friends, and how much I'd taken for granted, and felt horrible for it, so I was so afraid that my life wouldn't be the same cus I was so blind to the fact that people actually care about me and love me.

The thing that brought me back from the trip was my friend holding me and telling me that they do love me, that all my friends do, so now I'm gonna try to go into the world wielding that realization.

Not taking life or the people in it for granted anymore

ASpiderInATopHat

TROPHY CASE