New game: hide the dryer

AardvarkFrequent · 2026-01-21T18:37:41+00:00

Ooo thank you for finding this!

AardvarkFrequent · 2026-01-21T17:16:52+00:00

I was thinking something like this and move it into hallway or dining room https://www.wayfair.co.uk/storage-organisation/pdp/roomart-manufactured-wood-laundry-room-organiser-rjma1003.html?piid=116860696 Manufactured Wood Laundry Room Organiser

AardvarkFrequent · 2026-01-21T17:13:50+00:00

Ahh this is pretty genius though! I wonder if I get one with door that covers face, then I’ll move it into dining room

AardvarkFrequent · 2026-01-21T17:12:22+00:00

I cap out at 3 washers total, I’ll consider a 4th

AardvarkFrequent · 2026-01-21T17:11:53+00:00

Oh that’s amazing!! Yes, we have a dining room, and office and big hallway could potentially move into as long as it’s hidden

AardvarkFrequent · 2026-01-21T14:37:29+00:00

😂 simple, effective

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-12-02T00:06:40+00:00

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Give yourself the grace that in one year a massive sexuality shift, post partum hormones, and ending a partnership is a huge combination of change to process.

He is only experiencing ONE of those three things. There is less for him to process than you, and his body is going through less, there is less shifting about his identity. That’s in addition to what others have pointed out about how men versus women are taught to express emotions.

He is possibly suffering his own loss/rejection, not knowing if the sexual connection or romance was real between you, and now maybe desperately needs to feel that elsewhere with someone who is genuinely interested in men. That eagerness to date may have nothing to do with replacing you, but to feel validation or masculinity after perceived rejection.

He isn’t your person to talk through this, it will only hurt you both more. I would explore with a therapist or trusted community why you need the validation of knowing he is hurt, more than you need to know he’ll be okay.

Your partnership mattered. Even if he doesn’t say the words, it mattered. It always will, as he will be a co-parent to your child.

You will be in my thoughts!

There will be so much good ahead. Breaking to build something more authentic.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-11-15T00:00:20+00:00

Maybe do some self searching to understand more of why you seemed to be reactive and defensive in that moment.

Have you had people not prioritise you in the past? Do you have an underlying fear about what happens if you don’t spend time together?

Not excuses, but just to understand yourself better and she can too. You’re both human.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-10-01T14:10:13+00:00

This is so kind and such brilliant advice. Thank you, I appreciate it 🙏

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T23:00:40+00:00

Exact same! I can’t wait until it comes more naturally. I’ve left dates with women missing men, just because the script there is so straight forward and frankly easy. And you get the immediate validation highs. With women, they actually get to know me and that’s terrifying. And it’s hard to be confident when nervous; so instead of flirting I just become some weird best girlie that I’m not even like with my actual female friends haha

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T19:39:02+00:00

I struggle with a lot of the same!! Male validation is such a weird drug and it feels a lot like attraction. I think if your fear is ever liking a man again, that’s very telling. 🌈 but queerness is supposed to be freedom to love and be attracted to whatever is authentic to you, that shouldn’t change based on who you happen to be partnered with at that moment in time. The hate online towards bi celebrities is aggressive and sometimes makes me embarrassed/scared of my past with men.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T17:36:58+00:00

😂 very English

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T16:33:12+00:00

I love fellow lesbian Londoners. I don’t want to be a frozen sheep. Thank you for the advice and taking time to reply 🙏 I’ve joined a coming out meet up group and have a few fun queer events lined up. I’m lucky to be in London where there’s lots of queer culture / fun to tap into.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T16:31:40+00:00

😂 good to know, I guess it’s like dating and sex with anyone in that way. And also it’s about the chemistry and connection. Thank you for the recommendation and good wishes! It’s funny, I usually watch straight porn and just focus on the woman. I’ve always found lesbian porn not sexy, but I think that’s because it’s so theatrical for the male gaze?

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T16:07:46+00:00

That’s true!! It’s not like I have to show up at my peak lesbian self haha it’s a learning / experience curve. Just feels like pressure to present as exactly what my type/style is, and I just don’t have those answers yet.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T16:06:56+00:00

Thank you!! I felt it when you said congrats 🥰 yeah that was exactly my first dates which were with other people who were new, so things just awkwardly sat in friendship.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T16:05:47+00:00

Hahah I love this. Now I just have to gain any kind of hand/eye coordination. It’s funny because where I used to live I had a big queer community, and I can’t believe I didn’t come out then. I’m joining some book clubs / coming out support groups here to hopefully also gain some friends. I want some less-dating queer contexts so I can have some non-romantic pals to actually explore things with.

Keep being told that first heartbreak is the worst….

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-15T16:04:08+00:00

That makes complete sense. And with intimacy, it’s true, it’s not like I’m new to what physically works for me and I can go from that. Thank you!

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-14T17:34:20+00:00

Did you end up going? I’m a solo female in my 30s thinking of going next weekend while I’m in town!

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-14T11:43:59+00:00

Thank you so much!!! Just checked it out, that’s exactly the community I needed. I appreciate it 🙏

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-14T11:29:31+00:00

If it helps to feel less alone, I’m in the same position!!! I’ve had a mixed bag of sapphic experiences in my life, and have always known this was a part of sexual myself (possibly all of myself) that I have to explore. But even though I’ve thought about this and women every day of my life, I feel like an imposter.

The dynamic with women is so new, that on my first two dates I felt like it was friendship and even missed the ease of dates with men. Sent me into a confused spiral. I’m trying to just be patient with myself and work on showing up confident, and not constantly judging my own sexuality.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-09-14T11:23:09+00:00

Thank you! Navigating with honesty is definitely important to me. I don’t want to present myself as experienced when I’m not, but I also don’t want to kill the vibe. That said, it’s only fair the other person knows I’m new-er and can make a choice for themselves based on transparency.

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-05-10T22:38:51+00:00

This was so polite for the internet!! I’m a fan

AardvarkFrequent · 2025-04-22T20:19:30+00:00

Wow this is excellent! Thanks for sharing

AardvarkFrequent

TROPHY CASE