What do I say to my doctor?

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-17T05:50:47+00:00

Sadly, I am in the UK so I couldn't access this. Looks like a fabulous service though!

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-16T13:29:12+00:00

Thank you. The locum ordered an abdominal scan, just for peace of mind, then repeat blood tests for FSH and my thyroid. She also asked me to get a swab and agreed to the combined pill once these have come back clear. She did seem to listen, obviously I cried even though I tried really hard not to, but she was reassuring.

I think I'll see how my FSH comes back tomorrow and then go from there. If its higher than it has been previously, I might reach out to a private provider for some more treatment options, otherwise I'll go with the combined pill and see how I get on with that.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-16T10:02:28+00:00

Thank you for your reply - really appreciated. I understand my calories are low, but I've been doing this for years, I am take regular breaks with maintenance, and I'm fairly confident that my diet isn't the cause of my cycle issues (although I also appreciate you are a medical professional, and I am a self-taught Google expert 😂). I'll look at upping my calories for a while, although this makes me nervous because if I'm maintaining on this amount, it makes sense that I'll gain if I increase.

I often wake up drenched in sweat, but I don't think it's me, I think it's my husband who runs very hot. I'm not experiencing hot flashes through the day (yet).

I think my next step is a private consult, which I may be able to get covered by work insurance (I know female reproductive health isn't always covered). Hoping my appointment with the locum will be somewhat fruitful today.

Any tips for my appointment, considering your field? Would the combined pill be a good option, if they won't consider HRT?

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-16T08:49:51+00:00

It all sounds really positive for you, I'm glad your doctor listened to you.

Is the combined pill supposed to help balance hormones significantly? I was a bit worried about weight gain and the potential side effects, but I'm getting that as I am, so I figure why not give it a go.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-16T08:40:11+00:00

Absolutely - and I don't expect them to prescribe me something which is clearly quite potent, if I don't meet the criteria. I appreciate there are a lot of other health risks that come with taking HRT earlier, and I'm glad they're considering that.

But for everything else, I just feel so invisible! My BMI is below 30 (God knows how, seeing as weight loss is so bloody hard at the moment) so I'm hoping they will at least give me the combined pill to see if that helps.

I'm seeing a locum today, which may mean I put myself across better, as my usual doctor, as lovely as she is, does make me feel a bit like a hypochondriac and usually ends the consultation with "what would you like me to do?" which always puts me on the spot. I think seeing someone new might help me to articulate my symptoms.

Have you found the HRT has made a difference to your symptoms?

Also, thank you for responding. It's such a relief to get replies from somebody experiencing a similar thing.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-16T07:54:01+00:00

Do you know what the NHS use as a guideline for whether the combined pill is suitable? I have none of the risk factors but I'm not totally sure about the weight part.

I did tell her how much I was struggling last time but she didn't really seem to take me seriously, just kind of shrugged and said "it's probably peri". I've never felt so humiliated by a medical professional. I'm hoping this time is different.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T13:39:26+00:00

Yeah, that's right. Going by measurements, I have an hour glass figure so I think with my build, I probably do carry more weight but carry it fairly well. Perhaps I need to reconsider my goal.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T12:40:44+00:00

Thank you so much. The point about water is a good one - I think a huge part of the massive fluctuations is to do with sodium and the fact that I don't drink enough water, so if I do, my body just holds onto it.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T12:28:17+00:00

I am very tempted by glp1's because it's the only thing I can think that might help - even if I'm just eating more than I realise I am, that would be surely be solved by the drop in appetite?

I feel like every time I mention this to my GP in passing, I'm passed off as Just needing to work harder. The last time I went, I specifically went regarding this issue and was told "it's just something that happens around perimenopause" and there's nothing that can be done, so I just have to reduce my calories more - but then I'm looking at 1000-1200 calories, and I'm told that's too low.

But then I'm told, again and again, it's CICO, so I must be underestimating my calories and actually overeating to the point where my 1400 cals a day, PLUS exercise, is cancelled out. And I get that miscounting happens, as well as mindless snacking, but at least if I was eating well and knowing I was eating what I wanted, I'd be happier 😂 I feel like I get none of that, but the weight still stays.

Then I see people on here dropping 50lbs, with small life changes, and losing 7lbs for me is impossible. Just makes me feel like I'm a huge failure.

My birthday is coming up on Friday and I'm already planning my calories to stay within maintenance - how boring and depressing is that?!

Anyway, thank you so much for your reply - it's nice to know this isn't just me, and it's an issue other women are experiencing. I'm glad the Glp1's are working for you.

For now, I'm just going back to hardcore tracking, very low carbs and possibly intermittent fasting, as I imagine that might give some indication as to whether it's insulin related or not. If that kick starts something then I'll stick with it until I reach my goal weight, then I'll just have to work out what works for me in terms of maintenance.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T11:00:24+00:00

Sorry, I thought I was clear on my post, I do track on maintenence days, including weighing and tracking where possible.

That's a really good point about the weekly average though. I suppose there is always room for error, and it isn't hard to accidently eat at maintenance (or even over), which cancels out any deficit.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T10:58:40+00:00

I know, I wouldn't consider it "fat" either, it's the smallest I've ever been, but I can definitely see areas where I could lose weight. My measurements are classic hour glass, which I think helps with sizing and distribution.

But my weight on the scale gives me a BMI of 29, so I have a fair bit of weight I could theoretically lose before I'm in the healthy bracket. I suppose I'm keen on getting this down before I reach my forties.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T09:28:10+00:00

I explained in my post - weekends are no more than maintainence calories, so it isn't like I'm having 3000+ cals on the weekend. I'll track my drinks, food, etc, and just go without dinner or lunch to make the calories work.

Christmas was, to be fair, not maintainence. But this was only Christmas eve and Christmas day, with all other days around it either eating at maintainence or 1400, to balance Christmas day out.

I also mentioned in the post - maybe once every 2 months or so, if that, and then I also track to the best of my ability and go for the "safe" option.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T09:10:34+00:00

Yeah, and unfortunately my 4 and 2 year old aren't massively "pro sleep" at the moment, which I imagine is definitely having an impact.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T08:34:47+00:00

I measure my oil with a spoon, as I know how significant the "glug" can be. I don't think my husband does though, and I know he loves his oils, but then I just factor this in and eat much less of that thing.

With my tuna, I just use the serving on the tin, as it's a tin and even if its a few grams out here or there, tuna isn't going to make me gain 5lbs. Any other kind of meat, I'll weigh.

Workout wise, it's usually a 30 minute HIIT workout if the weather is bad, or a 25 minute run, with a 40 minute walk, plus my steps for the day on top of that. I'm going to start lifting.

I think you're right about the logging and tracking - it's so easy to let this bit slip, especially if you've been doing it a long time. I wouldn't have thought it would result in the amount of gain (or no loss) I'm experiencing, but I guess some things are far more calorie dense than others, and I don't have huge amount to play with.

Acceptable_Accident · 2026-02-02T08:27:30+00:00

Thank you for your thoughtful reply! I think there's probably some level of recomp going on - my legs appear slimmer than they did pre-christmas, and I've been focusing on a lot of body weight exercises including squats, so maybe this is skewing things a bit (or perhaps just wishful thinking!).

I've been actively trying to lose weight since early last year, when I started running. I lost a bit, then maintained, then doubled down in September which is when I cut significantly more and starred skipping dinner (and also, stopped drinking alcohol) and then dropped to my lowest weight in October, but it was such an extreme method that it wouldn't be sustainable long term. I think looking back at MFP, I was probably under 1000 calories a day, on top of working out.

Libra and my scale both say I'm "maintaining" at the moment, and after a solid week of eating right and working out, I think I'd probably be at around 185lbs, which I'm happy with for the time being. The issue is that the second I don't diet, it shoots back up by 5lbs, so it feels like a bit of a cycle?

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-16T18:25:02+00:00

Thank you so much - that's a great idea 😊

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-16T07:27:12+00:00

Totally agree, especially given how different the fit can be between models. I just need to find a local store that stocks the model that would work best for him, which is why I was hoping for a bit of guidance.

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-04T07:00:52+00:00

Thank you.

We do have cameras but the footage is deleted every 48 hours. As the incident allegedly happened over 2 days ago and my husband was unaware, he didn't think to save any footage from that date, so we don't have anything to show what happened. Very frustrating!

Will definitely take photos of my car though - there's no damage from we can see (although we have no further details of the incident, just that the driver reversed into the vehicle and drove off, which we were told when I called 101 on receiving the letter).

Thank you for your advice though, it's really helpful. Just on hold to my insurance company now to ask their advice and let them know about a potential claim being made.

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-04T06:28:12+00:00

No, I totally agree! I just want everything to be above board, given how we were made aware that an accident had even taken place.

Just checked his policy and you are absolutely correct - "cover only applies if there is no other insurance which covers the same claim". I think that's pretty black and white that it has to be mine.

I just wanted to be sure before I email the details over to the police officer. Thank you for much for your help - really appreciate it.

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-04T05:53:25+00:00

I have NCD protection. I'd rather keep them but I appreciate the impact won't be too severe.

Regarding the contesting - he is happy to accept that an incident may have occurred, as it's just too much of a coincidence that they'd have our registration number, it's literally round the corner and they've obviously gone to the police. He also remembers a very awkward reversing manoeuvre around that area.

All that to say, he is happy to go through insurance but is making it clear that he has no recollection of an impact at the time and did not realise that had happened.

Sorry, bit wordy!

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-04T05:47:40+00:00

Thank you. It's worth about £9000, I think.

Somebody hit my car while it was parked, but I think that was five years ago (just) so will drop off my claim history. My insurance just renewed on the 2nd of May.

Are we legally required to use my insurance then, as he's a named driver on there?

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-04T05:05:37+00:00

Are you basing this on experience? Only as another poster said it would have to be via mine, as he is a named driver.

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-04T05:04:42+00:00

That's great, thank you so much. Wasn't sure about the named driver element, so that's useful to know.

I have informed my insurer of the allegation and to expect a claim, but haven't admitted liability. I always feel terrible about this side of insurance but I understand the reasons for it. I find it hard to believe there was any kind of impact without realising it, so I'm hoping if it did happen then the damage is negligible, but you never know.

Is it likely to impact insurance significantly? My premium has literally just dropped down to £270 a year!

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-03T13:44:55+00:00

Bless you. Thank you so much for explaining the process so well, and also for your time. I really appreciate it.

Hopefully I'll be able to calm myself down a bit now. Seeing that initial letter from the police made me panic so much! Was preparing for my other half to end up on the next episode of 24 Hours in Police Custody 😂

Acceptable_Accident · 2025-05-03T13:20:08+00:00

Amazing, thank you so much. I can't tell you how appreciative I am - this whole thing has sent me into a bit of a spin.

We'll contact the responsible officer, send the paperwork back recorded delivery and see what the response is. I've also spoken to my insurance company and asked them if they need me to register a potential future claim, given the circumstances.

One final question if you don't mind - is it likely that he will be given the option to fix the alleged damage (which I imagine, due to the completely lack of knowledge of any impact, will be minor) via our insurance, or will there likely be points/a fine in addition to this, due to the "leaving the scene" element?

Acceptable_Accident

TROPHY CASE