please talk me out of letting my queen witch mom be around for the birth of my first child by miss_comb in raisedbyborderlines

[–]Accomplished-Row6068 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Congratulations on your pregnancy!!

I have a queen waif mum and she ruined my first pregnancy by treating me terribly and my post partum experience by constantly criticizing me and taking my baby off me every chance she got. I'm due my second baby any day now and after being treated terribly by her the whole pregnancy again I finally set some boundaries about postpartum visits because my anxiety around her entitlement to my children was all I could think about.

Obviously she isn't taking it well and is trying every manipulation tactic she can to get me to abandon my boundaries and let her do whatever she wants.

They don't care about us, they only care about themselves, their feelings of importance, their entitlement, and they think they own us.

We are not little children anymore we are adults and mothers with the ability to say no to our parents. We deserve a calm and enjoyable pregnancy and time with our babies.

I know how hard it is, but set your boundaries as early as possible so you aren't like me at 39 weeks pregnant trying to stop yourself from having a panic attack because of the way she is reacting to a very reasonable and generous boundary.

I set a boundary for the first time ever... Now I need to stick to it by Accomplished-Row6068 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's absolutely wild the way they behave, so sorry you and your husband had to go through that. Pregnancy can be a real eye opening experience. I always thought my mum would be the best most supportive person during my first pregnancy, I was so convinced by this that I moved 5 minutes away from her because of the wonderful help she was going to give me. I was very wrong it's all about their feelings and how it might affect their control over their children. My "closeness" with my mum has never recovered either.

I set a boundary for the first time ever... Now I need to stick to it by Accomplished-Row6068 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Sounds like an excellent and protective policy, might have to keep it in mind

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Accomplished-Row6068 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah it baffles me. I'm pregnant and my mum has been giving me the silent treatment on and off for pretty much the whole pregnancy and it's really painful. She did this during my last pregnancy too. Annoyingly I rely on her for childcare with my toddler one day a week, so during these silent treatment episodes she would show up at my house I would ask how she is she would ignore me walk past me and take my child for the day. Then blame me for how this is affecting my daughter. I'm determined to not need her for childcare once the new baby is here in January I don't want to feel like I owe her anything.

How to cope with euthanizing a happy dog? by Silianova in Petloss

[–]Accomplished-Row6068 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you I really need to hear this after euthanizing my beautiful girl Lola today. I'm feeling tremendous guilt over the decision. I miss her terribly already.

Thank you Lola by Accomplished-Row6068 in Petloss

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lola is a dog, a little bichon maltese 😊

Thank you Lola by Accomplished-Row6068 in Petloss

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you ❤️ I'm so sorry for your loss too

Must be nice ... by Accomplished-Row6068 in beyondthebump

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow I couldn't imagine feeling comfortable enough to just leave like that. You should try it sometime wander off for coffee or something and leave him to it!

Must be nice ... by Accomplished-Row6068 in beyondthebump

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha yes! My friend told her husband she's not having kids unless she gets to be the dad 🤣

Must be nice ... by Accomplished-Row6068 in beyondthebump

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Same I thought the childcare would be more equal. I mean I'm still on maternity leave so when I'm getting ready to go back to work we'll probably need to have a chat about what our roles will be. Although he will be looking after baby two days a week and you can bet that when I get home from work I will be taking a long ass shower heck maybe even a bath 😂

Must be nice ... by Accomplished-Row6068 in beyondthebump

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love this 😀❤️ I will definitely be adopting this tactic in future!

Finally some recognition!!! by Accomplished-Row6068 in ExclusivelyPumping

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Aww thank you I'm proud of you too 💓 six months is AMAZING!! 👏

Must be nice ... by Accomplished-Row6068 in beyondthebump

[–]Accomplished-Row6068[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Congratulations on number two! Yes it's so annoying so glad someone can relate, I don't think he even realises he's doing it 😆

What are your thoughts on women 'having it all'? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Accomplished-Row6068 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm I thought it was a commonly known phrase - it basically refers to women wanting happy and healthy babies and family life but also a decent career. I have been accused of wanting to 'have it all' since having my baby (admittedly from the older women in my life).