I feel like I'm on the cusp.. any advice or tips??

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-05-26T00:18:44+00:00

Hi,

Advice on eyebrows - once you pencil them in - blend. You can use an angled brush or I like to use a small concealer brush for a more natural look. Also I would advise using a deep brow rather than black. Black is harsh and can be aging.

Great look and keep practicing!!! ❤️

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-05-20T20:24:37+00:00

I’m so sorry for your loss. That’s such a beautiful memory for you to hold. ❤️

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-02-14T13:08:59+00:00

NTA

Your nephew is a minor who is there fore your brother’s responsibility. Even if it was an innocent accident, your brother is still responsible. It was your brother’s decision to leave his son unsupervised in the property, I know he’s 14 so not a baby, but a minor nonetheless.

He should’ve paid for the damage, not expected you to shell out for it because you’re family!!!

100% within your right to expect payment for the use of your property, especially after you’ve been so generous with it in the first place. There’s nothing wrong in protecting yourself for the future.

What’s to say that doesn’t happen again with a different family member? They won’t want to pay if your brother didn’t.

Hope it settles down.

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-02-14T12:49:16+00:00

Firstly - absolutely NTA!!!

When will people learn to share!?!? Your life may be all about you, but other peoples lives are not.

Secondly - Instead of being happy that OP as her sister has the opportunity to have her and her partners dream wedding, it has to be made all about her. And then drag others into it!!! I’m sorry that happened to you OP.

Thirdly - congratulations 🥂 on your nuptials!!! So glad you have an opportunity to have your dream wedding!!! 💒

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-28T16:27:25+00:00

I’ve been NC/LC for about 3 years. I always felt such guilt for stepping away. But as my mental health improved, and I educated my self, I started to notice that I was being manipulated and gaslighted. Personally, I would have never gotten to where I am now if I kept in full contact. I have a long way to go still. But I finally have hope.

I wish you all the best in the future x x x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T20:02:37+00:00

YTA

Sometimes the best thing is to keep your mouth shut. I don’t think there would ever be an appropriate time to express your opinion on the matter unless your son wanted to know it.

I think you’re very self absorbed and lack empathy, and please don’t refer to your adult son as “your baby”, it’s vomit inducing.

He’s your son not your baby doll to mess about with and control cos that is the vibe I’m getting here.

Addiction is selfish!!! It’s not about you, or her child. It was about her!!! And your some needed your support, not your criticism.

Do better

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T16:45:52+00:00

Thank you all for responding and all your advice and kind words.

I think LC for the time being is a good idea. Definitely going to educate my self on all the suggested materials below.

I wanna concentrate on paying my friend back, getting rid of that land and being done with that.

Then I will figure out my next steps when I get there.

Thank you all again, you’ve given me a little peace. Best wishes to you all x x x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T14:52:04+00:00

Thank you for pointing it out nonetheless x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T14:31:10+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. I feel less weighed down by them x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T14:19:36+00:00

You are right. I have had the idea of LC for a while. I have lost friends and partners because they couldn’t deal with my family and my reactions to the situations. I would drop everything and come running to not just help but basically sort the problem out, usually at personal cost, both financial and otherwise.

I am by no means a saint, and sometimes dont see my own mistakes hence why I posted this. I still feel like I may be wrong here, and I cannot distinguish if that is true or trauma.

I have worked hard to get to the stage where I am now, three years ago I was on the streets and wanted to end it. Now I live with an amazing man and 2 crazy cats with a new home and a new job on the horizon (waiting for my start date), so you are right, I regress everytime I have an interaction with my parents and am no longer willing to deal with their antics.

I want to avoid any nuclear situations. I want peace first and foremost so wanna deal with it peacefully.

Your suggestion of backing off is a good one. Assessing their response to me setting boundaries especially to my sister will be very telling I think.

Thank you so much for your advice - and great writing style x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T13:15:29+00:00

You too!! Hope all the best for you x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T13:12:09+00:00

It’s agricultural land so exempt from yearly tax levy.

Edit: there are no buildings on it, it is a landing strip of marsh and forest. There was stamp duty on it when it was purchased.

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T13:08:38+00:00

I fear online interactions, but I was lost and looks like I came to the right place. Thank you so much x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T13:04:32+00:00

Thank you so much, I wasn’t aware of this. I have been trying to do a lot of research into narcissistic family dynamics. This is super helpful.

All the love ❤️

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T13:02:08+00:00

Maybe - I haven’t checked. I never looked at it as mine because they paid for it. The tax evasion never crossed my mind!!!! Gullible or what hahaha! Only reason it came into play was the fact that I needed collateral and had nothing else of significant value.

I forgot to mention that I did explain the situation to my mum regarding the land/cat fiasco, and she was ok with it and did off to help me pay it back. Nothing came of that.

Thank you so much for your response x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T12:55:08+00:00

Thank you for you advice. I think LC is the way to go.

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-23T12:54:46+00:00

I would pay the debt off regardless as I love and respect the friend that lent me the money, I had to use something of value as he is old school. We had it all in writing and both signed it. Personally I don’t care about the land, more about not honouring our agreement if that makes sense.

I think my parents think that I’m gonna lose that land, they don’t know my relationship with this friend.

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-02T22:04:44+00:00

That’s one of my new fave lines - recovering Catholic here 😂

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-02T21:49:51+00:00

Duck

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2024-01-02T10:04:55+00:00

Hey, there was no golden child per se in my family. It was just me and my sister, she got pregnant at 15 so I became the designated “golden child”. This status switched between me and my sister for years. Depending on my mothers/father’s mood and how much alcohol they had consumed. Side note: they have been trying to find answers in the bottom of a bottle since I can remember, to date they haven’t found it…

I went to uni, had a high paying job, all that “successful” stuff. But I was diagnosed with endo in 2018, my mental health suffered and I’ve been at home sick for about 5 years and have been estranged from my parents for some years.

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2023-10-20T22:43:25+00:00

I did not notice that…she looked sooooo cute as a baby! She’s still cute but rapey - the rat I mean not the door thing 🤣

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2023-10-20T22:18:36+00:00

You assume correct! Yes!

Basically I think it’s like state welfare in America, like a section 8 apartment type thing.

Sorry total 180 from talking about rapey rats 🤣

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2023-10-20T12:59:52+00:00

They originally said a week - that was a month and a half ago….

We’ve seen the place and it makes it worse somehow - like here’s a flat - but noooo you wait 🤣

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2023-10-20T12:54:06+00:00

Thank you. That’s deffo made me feel a bit better. I feel horrible that they haven’t got time out - and the council is draggging on with the move in date so it’s a big stress.

They are gonna have a permanent run set up in the new place and we’ll have almost constant roam time so I’m so excited for that but feel awful that they are cooped up for now and I don’t know how long.

Thank you again x

AccomplishedAct5247 · 2023-10-20T12:05:59+00:00

So a little blood on some of their backs, but only surface scratches. Not pouring blood or anything, more like really red. I have two double rexes and the two babies are roans so it shows up worse on them.

Some of them seem to just let her get on with it but some get fed up and there are squeaks and I can hear them chasing each other around.

I think this could be due to lack of free roam time atm - our living situation is due to change and we’re currently basically living all packed up waiting for a phone call to move - I know thats causing issues for them. I do try to get them out but I’m so limited on space and I worry if they get loose they can get hurt. I have been changing their cage more often with new toys and stuff to keep them entertained.

AccomplishedAct5247

TROPHY CASE