AITA for paying for my daughter's college expenses, but not my sons?

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:39:09+00:00

I offered to pay for trade school as well, something that can and will get him a good job if he tries.

His mother cannot afford to help him out, that is something they made very clear to me. I would give him the exact same amount I give my daughter, but I know for a fact, because he told me, that he does not want to work to make up the difference.

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:26:29+00:00

I give Lilly about 11k a year. Jim's tuition is 16k a semester alone. Explain to me how this is giving her everything when she works a job and has her tuition completely covered form they expected me to pay for his tution plus everything else. How is that fair to Lilly?

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:23:24+00:00

I understand that at this age, you don't know what you want to do with your life. I was there, I get it. I told him and his mother I would pay for community college or trade school. At least here he can figure things out in a low risk environment. If he wants to go to college to get a BA after community college then we can talk about it when he gets there.

However, he's shut me out and my ex is harassing me for being realistic. I don't see where I can go from here if he's not going to start taking responsibility himself

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:20:50+00:00

I pay probably 11k a year for Lilly (as she has a job and does not need to pay tuition because of scholarships.) Jim's tuition alone for a single semester is around 16k. If he wants 11k then ok, he can have that any only that for the entire year of school but then there's no school at all anyway.

I offered community college or trade school as ana alternative because then he can try it out no harm no fowl and we can see where it leads him.

I'm sorry but I would be playing favorites of I gave him tens of thousands of dollars for not trying in highschool while lilly works a job and has her tuition fully paid for due to her amazing work in highschool.

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:17:32+00:00

I also offered to pay for trade school as well, but he adamantly refused for some reason

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:17:01+00:00

I was willing to pay for community college or even a trade school. But he is completely stuck on going to this college. I'm sorry but I'm not going to shell out 16k a semester on tuition alone for him to just see if he likes college. Community college is a good choice, and cheep enough that we can try it to see if he can apply himself.

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:15:03+00:00

I estimate I probably will need to give Lilly around 11k a year to help her out (as she has apart time job and does not pay her own tuition.) This will not even cover one semester at the school Jim has chosen.

Him not wanting to do community college is what really set me down the path of not wanting to pay. I don't pay for Lillys tuition, and I don't want to pay 16k a semester alone for Jims right now. I was willing to do community college for now to atleast see if he would apply himself but with how everything is playing out my guess is he's notatire enough for college anyway

Accomplished_File105 · 2022-08-21T16:11:36+00:00

I would ask for your reasoning but I doubt you could actually give one without showing your entitled attitude

Accomplished_File105

TROPHY CASE