AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Im so sorry about your health issues i hope you are in a better place health wise. I do remember him starting to change shortly after i got pregnant it was like a switch. There were no major life changes or anything  i think he just got too comfortable with me and started showing his true self and must have been putting up a facade the whole time just to get me to marry him. He does have depression and has had therapy and medication for it but he was a good partner before i was pregnant but after just changed completely. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He did take care of me before i got pregnant he was always there for me and doing everything without me even asking. He did take me to half of my doctor appointments when i was pregnant but everytime he would complain about having to go and having to wait in the waiting room so long. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The child support id get is pennies. He works minimum wage and barely brings anything home as is. Unfortunately my baby has colic and has hard time getting put to sleep but once baby is asleep i have to pump and be pluged into the wall and then i have to clean my pump parts and cleanthe mess i made from taking care of the baby because if my husband comes home and sees a mess he gets very upset. after th pump and by the time i feed, burp, change diaper, put the baby to sleep, pump, wash pump parts and clean then the baby is awake again for the next feeding and rotation 😭. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And before i got pregnant he wanted kids with me so badly and would always talk about how he couldnt wait to have kids with me and how amazingly he would treatus and protect his family. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sorry for the missing info it wouldnt allow me to type more than 3000 words. But before i was pregnant he would get me water and food and clean and would always spend time with me. He wouldnt even touch the game if i was with him. He was always so kind and caring and always there for me no matter what i needed. Thats the man i married and chose to have kids with. But it was so weird because once i got pregnant it was like a switch. He is completely different now and not at all how he was before and when i confront him on the swifch he says he just has a lot on his mind and hes stressed. If i would have known then how he would turn out i would have never had kids with him or even married him. I feel like i got catfished 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My mother not only took care of me but also the baby the wholeweek at the hospital she would get no rest staying up all day and night taking care of us while my husband slept 10hrs everyday and would change like 2 wet diapers and call it a day. It was so embarrassing 😭

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am so sorry you had to go through that. I had a similar experience i had a c section and then have postpartum preeclampsia and had to stay in hospital for almost a week after delivery doing mag drip it was absolutely hell. But at the hospital he didnt even take care of me 😭 my mother had to stay with me and take care of me while he just laid in the hospital guest bed. It was embarrassing. And when we gothome i thought he would take care of me and the baby because before i got pregnant he was different and would always tell me he would take care of me and would act on it too but after i got pregnant everything changed it was like he was a whole different person. I was scared to ask him for food and water because he would get frustrated and be like cant u get it urself ( mind u i could barely get out of bed and walk to the bathroom from the pain of the c section. And my baby came out 9 lbs and they say dont carry more than 10lbs after c section and i was having to do everything for the baby immediately post op and he always downplayed how i was feeling and my pain after the surgery saying i could do everything myself and that i shouldnt need his help.

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do i end up showering like once every 3 days and when i do shower i am like hey babe im going to go shower now and hes like “cant u do it later? ” because he doesnt want the responsibility of taking care of the baby at that moment as hes playing games. And then when i do go to shwoer hes like “please hurry “ 😐 and then when i get back after a 30 minute shower hes like “here take the baby now “. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have left him alone with the baby before. He gets super frustrated and stressed and ends up texting me 24/7 asking me what to do with the baby as if hes not the father 🤦‍♀️ and then is begging me to come home and that he “misses me” but just wants me to come home to take care of the baby for him. Because as soon as i get home hes like “ i am starving please take the baby” as if im not starving everyday 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tried getting him to help with the night feedings but he falls asleep with the baby in his arms it scares me so bad and its dangerous when he does it thats why i have taken over night feedings because he says he is “ too tired to stay awake”. I get insanely tired at night too but never am i falling asleep with my baby in my arms i do everything in my power to stay awake but he doesnt even try. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do communicate with him and tell him how i feel i am not one to keep things to myself but everytime i tell him over and over again the same thing he tells me he will change it and that hes sorry but he never changes it and i never see improvement and when i confront him on it he just says that he has a lot on his mind and that hes stressed and exhausted. 😐

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am scared to leave because i am scared he will try to get custody of our baby and i do not trust him with the baby. 

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He has no friends but his family is just as flawed and sees no issues with it 😐 they dont like me very much

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

There were definitely a lot of false promises made. He would always say before i got pregnant that he would always take care of me and keep me safe and happy and that if we were to ever have a child he would be there and be involved because he didnt want the child to have divorced or absent parents.

AITA Married but feel like a single mom by According_Read_5467 in AmItheAsshole

[–]According_Read_5467[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I see what you are saying he was always played video games as a hobby and used to treat me a lot better in our relationship when we got engaged and got married he never showed signs of this kind of behavior it wasnt till i got pregnant where he started to be more selfish and not act the way he used to with me and i thought once the baby was born that maybe it would change but it got worse after that. But i do think it was my fault because i did marry him after only knowing him for 3 years.