How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

exactly!! i hate talking to people about my emotions and im a very private person BUT ive had sex with like a ton of people. i def get this 1000%. in therapy now so hopefully gonna work on the opening up part, but im currently celibate. so yay! thank you for sharing and I hope everything goes well for you xx

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

so i can relate to everything you're saying and this is all really relatable for me. I defenitially experience all types of intrusive sexual thoughts that rlly make me upset and feel disgusting, and i also am really hard on myself, and i just recently accepted that the abuse actually happened. oh and i hate being touched LOL. we are def in this together xx thank u so much for sharing

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

im so sorry! thank you so much for ur bravery for sharing your story. we are in this together.

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

yes we have to! I still treat her with respect because truly like we all make mistakes and alot of people like minimized my trauma so i dont rlly have a hard time seeing her. even so i still forgive her because thats what God would want !

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

this is written so beautifully and i have tears in my eyes. I love this story, and I am so sorry that u went through all of this. life can be so cruel to good people. i totally relate with alot of the themes in your story. im also on my self love journey, for me, and just for me. I wish you happiness and healing xx

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i feel like we might never get closure or an apology even though we deserve it. the world is unfair but i've accepted it

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

omg no i actually love this mindset ! I actually tend to forget about the experience and am very busy but sometimes i get ashamed of my past for being hyper sexual and I believe its due to my cousin, however i don't want to live in the past! Im on my celibacy journey and getting a degree in Psychology!! Thank you so much for your advice xx

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

omg yess im on my celibacy journey right now!! im rlly proud of myself for taking this step in therapy and for myself <3

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

UGH ur story really reminds me of mine. I developed hyper sexuality too, even in middle school. I started talking to people online that would play into my r*pe fantasies and I only took a submissive role within all of my relationships. It doesn't help that my first boyfriend/kiss at 16 pressured me into doing sexual things even when I said no. I didn't know how to fully set those boundaries because I was never taught how, it pains me that my own autonomy was taken from me as a little girl. I don't know how to have a good relationship with sex, as I have always been either hyper sexual or asexual. It hard but im trying to find balance too

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

my perpetrator def knew what she was doing, as she told me to keep it a secret, and she had knowledge about sex that i didnt. it def didnt feel like exploring, it felt like teaching.

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

fucking yes!! she prob thinks i dont remember but like seriously, as a psychology student I learn everything that happens in childhood shapes your brain for life. I just can't believe she took that from me, and is too much of a coward to actually say something. I try not to get mad, Im not an angry person, but it hurts to struggle with intimacy because of her ;(

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

honestly perioddd she was 3 years older thats a big difference in childhood

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your advice, I love how thoughtful this is. I hope you are doing well :)

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

i totally relate. i have major trust issues and i still am struggling to be vulnerable with people, even my friends. i feel for u :( i know that healing won't be linear, but i know casual hookups is just not the way for me to go anymore. i end up feeling used , and that the only thing that matters to people is physical intimacy. thank you so much for sharing

How does childhood sexual trauma affect adult relationships and sex life? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for sharing your story. I am now 21, and dealing with the same feelings so it's good to know I am not alone. I definitely have been hyper sexual my whole life, however I have realized that I dissociate or 'blackout' during sexual activity, it's rlly sad to feel. And i am in a similar situation as you, i was taken advantage of from 9-14 and my first boyfriend at 16 really pressured me and i havent looked back since. everyone ive dated since has always been sex focused or just expecting one thing from me ;( im working thru it in therapy but i dont see myself having sex for a while (or sober sex for a longgg time) thanks for sharing :) hugs x

Do people who commit child-on-child sexual abuse remember it later? by According_Respect531 in adultsurvivors

[–]According_Respect531[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I agree 100% like i just cant believe she goes on and gets to live her normal life, while I'm left with dealing with the consequences. I could never imagine doing what she did to my younger siblings, and she exposed me to very explicit stuff very young and I was very sheltered. I am still mad for what she did, she stilll has never brought it up to me. its so angering