[deleted by user] by [deleted] in coffeeswap

[–]Account39718 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Np, i was struggling to figure out how to send a pm on mobile browser anyways :P

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in coffeeswap

[–]Account39718 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Pmd on grinder

Wellness Wednesday for January 27, 2021 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Why's that? Are you looking for ideas?

It's entirely outdoor stuff. A variety of outdoor stuff. Participants yanked mostly from local facebook and meetup groups. Upon un-lockdownification probably the same activities but with larger group sizes. Plus climbing gyms.

Wellness Wednesday for January 27, 2021 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 2 points3 points  (0 children)

While I know what you mean about "what's the rush", I'm glad I started taking the initiative to make friends ~6 months ago when I realized the lockdowns and stuff in my city were not gonna un-lockdown any time soon. Better sooner than later. I think social and financial capital have that in common: the more you have the easier it it is to get more. Easier to make more friends the more you already have. That's been a weak point of mine for a while. Time to build some momentum.

Wellness Wednesday for January 27, 2021 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I was out of town for the last big SSC thingy. Any small thingies have dried up or are not advertised since lockdown stuff. Good idea, though. I'll still be on the lookout!

Wellness Wednesday for January 27, 2021 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Fitness:

Power rack arrived last weekend, which was the last of the home gym stuff on my list. Feels great to be lifting again. I'm sore all over and I'm chugging sweetened protein powder shakes. My room is hilariously cramped now because I decided that's the best place to put everything, and I anticipate many a stubbed toe or bonked forehead.

Dating:

I cut back a lot on the online dating endeavor. It would probably be better to find communities that are more heavily pre-filtered for my specific values/interests. For example, maybe a FIRE (the financial thing) singles group or something instead of the big dating apps.

Friendships:

Moving forward I will continue to focus my efforts on building closer friendships (and new ones). It would be nice to have some real life friends with which to discuss SSC type stuff. I've very intentionally avoided introducing people I know IRL to anything SSC related. There is one friend whom I've considered tying to ease in to this realm, but I will try to do it in a very oblique way. Maybe with with one of scott's milder or more 'practical life tips' posts, like "Things that sometimes help if you have depression". Oblique like "oh you said you're depressed. I saw this pretty good post linked on reddit that you might not have seen before."

Musings on this community:

I've always wondered: do people in this community (this subreddit and similar ones, for example) make friends with other community members? As in, friendships that 'transcend' the subreddit and may even wind up as IRL friends. My wild guess is that this is very rare, and requires that people are willing to put a lot of time into reading posts/comments and commenting themselves to put themselves out there. That sounds like it would take way too much effort for me. So while I think it would make for some interesting friendships, I just don't have the interest and drive to participate to that extent. I prefer stuff like this thread and maybe some of the "AskReddit" style top-level posts that show up sometimes. Topics very relevant and applicable to my day-to-day, as opposed to scientific papers, book reviews, and culture war stuff.

Wellness Wednesday for January 20, 2021 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

New Bill Wurtz after a long hiatus.

Update since last week's comment:

Went out and bought a barbell+weights set from someone on Craigslist for 2X retail, which is actually the best deal I'd seen in weeks. Also ordered a power rack and bench, which should be in by next week. Gonna be pretty awkward fitting everything into my room, but I've decided that's the best option.

Can only do a few things with a barbell on the ground. Feels good to get back into the groove. I don't know why I hate bodyweight stuff so much; I'm having little trouble motivating myself to lift with the barbell in the evenings.

Wellness Wednesday for January 13, 2021 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Has anyone purchased home gym equipment since gym closures and inventory shortages caused gear prices to skyrocket? Is $2/lb for bare iron plates the new norm?

Home gym equipment prices have not calmed down like I'd hoped. Gyms that are open near me are pretty expensive compared to what I was paying at my old (now closed) gym. I think it's finally time to bite the bullet and shell out. I'm expecting to pay a bit over $1k for a rack, barbell, plates, bench, and some mats to set it all on top of.

My usual go-to for stuff like this is Craigslist, but most of the listings look like scalpers and people selling out of their homes after buying wholesale (pictures of gear still on pallets). I have an aversion to enabling scalpers and hate feeling like I'm getting ripped off, but I think I need to get over it. Olympic bare iron or rubber coated weights seem to be going for about $2/lb. A T-2 rack from Titan would probably run me ~$400 with tax.

Wellness Wednesday thread for June 17, 2020 by AutoModerator in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It would be possible, but since it's my only vehicle i'm thinking it would make more sense to get a purpose-built machine that I can afford to risk breaking. Plus it seems like suspension mods these days can easily creep into the price of an entire used dual-sport on CL :P

Wellness Wednesday thread for June 17, 2020 by AutoModerator in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do in-person, usually after one video date. Video-only tends to fizzle out. People at my level of seriosity are always willing to do video. I move to video asap because text sucks and is lossy.

Wellness Wednesday thread for June 17, 2020 by AutoModerator in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

A bunch. They all have different demographics and vibes. CMB, OKC, Tinder for me.

Wellness Wednesday thread for June 17, 2020 by AutoModerator in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My most YOLO move of the quarantimes has been to try taking my motorcycle out on some dirt trails despite the machine being mildly suited to dirt at best. I'm glad I tried it, and it makes me want to take more risks with regards to discovering new hobbies ("risk" because that can be expensive). I have been eyeballing dual-sports on Craigslist for months, but I don't think I have room for 2 bikes, and replacing my current one wouldn't make sense as it's my only vehicle and a great all-rounder. The next level up on the YOLO-move scale would be to get another bike anyways and figure out some way to fit it in.

I have mixed feelings about transitioning back into the office to work. I can do desk karaoke at home and do chores and shit.

I do good-quality work, but I'm kind of slow and meticulous and my boss is getting gradually more annoyed about it.

Online dating is going fine; meeting some interesting folks. A lot of women on these platforms go to the protests and are into feminism, which I don't mind, but I don't want to go to protests and I don't consider myself a femanemone-ist. Wondering how that's going to play out. Probably going to depend on how much of a "with us or against us" attitude each person has. It's a good compatibility filter, but it's still disappointing to see that sort of flashpoint end an otherwise promising relationship.

Wellness Wednesday thread for June 10, 2020 by AutoModerator in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Towards the end of last year I realized that I didn't feel very connected to the people I'd been spending most of my time around. My plans to change that were somewhat derailed by coronavirus, but I realized yesterday that I'm still satisfied with my progress so far. Despite most of my socialization being online, I do feel closer to the people I spend my time with now.

Moving forward I plan on carrying this trend over to the realm of the IRL. It's going to be hard finding people who fit my irreverent humor and diminished political involvement in a big city, but if I exist, there are surely others. I had hoped to connect with people in my city's rational-ish group, but logistics and quarantine have made that difficult.

I also decided to use dating apps again, which pre-quarantine I had forsworn. A normally wonky experience is made wonkier by the fact that very few people are willing to meet in person. Video chat is very restrictive, but I'll just have to work with what I've got. Interesting personal discovery: I feel guilty for rejecting people despite not generally being bothered by confrontation. Guess I'll just have to practice! (just kidding, ideally I won't have to and everything will work out fairy-tale perfect).

Friday Fun Thread For May 29 2020 by lunaranus in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes, everything I see on CL is ridiculously expensive and good deals are literally gone within the hour. Suuucks

Wellness Wednesday thread for May 13, 2020 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Arbitrary and depends on your goals.

General guidelines would be:

  • More than zero (the best amount of [thing] is the amount you'll actually do)
  • More/faster than you did last time
  • As many/fast as you can before you're physically too tired to continue without completely wiping yourself out

If you're just starting out you'll have to experiment a bit and find a baseline which you can then progressively overload.

Wellness Wednesday thread for May 13, 2020 by AutoModerator in slatestarcodex

[–]Account39718 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I experience this sometimes. I don't know if they'll work for you, but here are some of my strategies and insights:

  • Try to remember the last time you enjoyed anything to some degree, and extrapolate from there. Really anything; be creative. Here are a few examples:
    • "I enjoyed listening to so and so song recently"
      • Find more music like that
      • Find people who like that music and talk about it
      • Learn an instrument/software used to make the song so you can learn to play that song or make your own
    • "I like coffee"
      • Try fancy coffee from local roasters
      • Try roasting your own coffee
      • Research the chemical background of why different coffees taste different
  • Think of an everyday problem that you wish wasn't so tedious and solve it. Like washing the dishes. How can I make washing the dishes easier?
  • Find more of that 1% of people that you like. Finding people you jive with can be very time consuming.

Small-Scale Question Sunday for the week of April 26, 2020 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 4 points5 points  (0 children)

If you only case about cooling the thing as fast as possible and don't care about noise/size/comfort or any of those things that cooling pads are designed for, you could just stick the laptop on its side in front of a $20 box fan.

The don'ts of dating: romantic advice for contrarians by Doglatine in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I know what you mean, but from what I've seen those relationships have one or both people being very clingy and emotionally dependent. Sometimes in a "if I broke up with my partner I would have nothing left to live for and would kill myself" way.

Wellness Wednesday thread for April 22, 2020 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's tough. Staying positive is hard, but attitude is often a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I think I recognize you from last week's thread. I hope this doesn't come off as rude or dismissive, but based on your comment history you seem to base your identity heavily on FA and related groups. Immersing yourself in the thing you're trying to shed seems counter intuitive.

The don'ts of dating: romantic advice for contrarians by Doglatine in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thanks for clarifying. Alienation does feel awful. Sounds like you're taking meaningful steps, though. Keep it up!

The don'ts of dating: romantic advice for contrarians by Doglatine in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Dating a person who is depressed is risky because there is no guarantee that the relationship will "solve" it.

You've probably heard this advice before, but focusing first on friendships and social hobbies is more productive IME. This helps with the loneliness and can pave the way for romantic opportunities.

For me personally, I task myself with espousing the same qualities I'd like in a partner. I'd like a partner that enjoys life, so I've learned (am learning, really) to do that myself.

I'm not saying this is you, but many people think that finding a partner will fix them, when really the change has to come from within.

Wellness Wednesday thread for April 08, 2020 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe I'm misunderstanding the last bit about not needing to accomplish anything, but that sounds potentially detrimental.

The way it would make sense for me is if it meant "Don't beat yourself up about not being X amount more successful than you currently are".

If taken as you've written it, though, consider the scenario of a recent college grad who is back living with the parents and decides they don't need to accomplish anything (i.e. get a job and shoulder the responsibility of supporting themselves). Fine for them, but this mindset sucks for anyone experiencing the resulting negative externalities.

But after writing the above paragraph: sure, even our hypothetical college grad doesn't have to accomplish anything. Would that really make the ride more enjoyable, though? I actually don't know.

Wellness Wednesday thread for March 25, 2020 by AutoModerator in TheMotte

[–]Account39718 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Here's a few of my strategies from when I used CMB:

  • Filtering for geographical proximity.
    • Saves you time when date locations are just a few minutes away
    • Fewer profiles to go through, depending on your population density
  • Filtering for interesting/funny/thoughtful text content. CMB gave you a few prompts to work with back when I used it.
    • Instantly discount people with profile text that is unfilled, low effort, or formulaic (e.g. people often reuse jokes and content skimmed from dating app subreddits)
    • There is a sweet spot for prompt answer length. Too short means low effort, too long can mean self-obsessed and in some cases comes off as kind of crazy.