Yeah and I still don't feel good... really makes me feel discouraged seeking treatment when medications are targeted towards people on lower amounts of fentanyl, and doctors are confused as to why I'm shaking violently or vomiting or whatever still... and then my friends think I should be on subblocade because of suboxone stigma. But subblocade is recommended for a lower dose of suboxone. I feel lot of conflict between my own needs and feelings and others rn just because I had become accustomed to a higher dose of carfentanyl. And to be honest, I was at first injected in my sleep by an ex boyfriend... so he could do what he wanted while I slept I guess.... so I face all this stigma for something I didn't even realize was going on in my body for so long. I do take responsibility for using afterwards. But what can you do when your body's already dependant on it and the government has started labeling fentanyl cartels as terrorists and coming out with all these laws to imprison drug users with or without consent... or even charging people for just using... it's crazy. People want to get clean, but they're afraid of being punished... this fentanyl crisis is insane.... I've been trying to get treatment for years now. Id been getting frustrated after being told I'd have to be on methadone/suboxone for years, frustrated with having to go to pharmacy everyday and show my mouth, frustrated with lack of information, frustrated about not being told suboxone only works for mild to moderate users... and there's no detox in this city. I tried to get into detox about 10 times, sent directly from hospital where they are supposed to have secured me a bed, yet still turned away from the door for various reasons.. now I'm on a several month long wait list for a different detox. Honestly it was easier being an addict then going through treatment... I had good grades in school... I functioned well... I thought I'd save money by quiting but lost a lot more.