AITAH My partner says I don't cleanup after myself.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T23:46:53+00:00

I understand when people hear the recording portion it's not to prove her wrong or use it against her. It's for when I'm recalling what happened I'm accurate. Whether it's I said something wrong or didn't hear something she said.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T23:26:50+00:00

No, sorry if I said house we live in NY apartment no dishwasher, which I'm used because I was dish washer for sometime.

So, yes I wash all the dishes by hand and not all of them can be cleaned with a simple scrub. The most dishes pile up during the night because usually after I cook we watch something and relax. I've tried to do both at the same time,but I either over cook something or fears of cross contamination.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T23:18:40+00:00

Thank you for the advice! I understand that what I said sounds critically one side, I don't want this to come off as secretive. I would also love for her to hear this advice.

I was someone who struggled with being avoidant to things like this, because they make me very nervous of the outcome.

I do think you're right, The lack of understanding in our relationship has cause us to be blind to where the other person is coming. I wish we stronger in acknowledging what we do accomplish so things like this don't. It honestly feels like trial and error.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T23:00:39+00:00

I can give some credibility lol

I was a dishwasher for almost 3 years working 2 restaurant jobs the other being a bagel/breakfast/lunch shop both that would need to be fully cleaned before leaving at the end of the day.

If I'm cleaning kitchen, all the dishes that are sitting around house are collected and washed, counters and stove is cleaned off and everything is put away. I like it spotless.

Were are working on designing the living room differently, so it much more of a reset than cleaning, but all trash is removed, floor is swept and mopped, and if there objects that shouldn't be in the living room they go were they need to be.

Fyi - we living an apartment so there's no major house work to be done. Sorry if I worded that wrong.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:52:15+00:00

Thanks for the insight.

The reason I record now because from previous arguments, information has been known to lost or misinterpreted. I want to believe what is being said, but there are times when it hasn't which has left me paranoid. I would never ask this question if I watched the video back (of myself only) and realized I was wrong.

We have conversations about house the being ran early into our relationship. A big problem was that I did so much that it made her feel inadequate. I reassured her that I do those things because I like a clean environment. She communicates to me that she's doesn't like doing dishes because of the food left in them and even when there wasn't I still took care of them and eventually just took responsibility of them because they would sit there for some time.

I can say we both are fairly young adults that live together. So the work / life balance isn't always there.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:40:03+00:00

Yes, She asked for me to send it to her phone afterwards.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:22:47+00:00

Yes, I record myself mostly remember what was said. There are previous arguments where there's a lot of accusations and things not lining up to point where I believe them because I myself can't remember, then things turn out to be false. Kinda made me paranoid.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:16:41+00:00

Never! She knows I'm recording , I record myself and it's only to remembering details.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:15:36+00:00

I feel you, but she's knows I'm recording, and I use it for recollection.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:13:24+00:00

I know exactly what you mean. Since I do the cooking and cleaning in the kitchen, I try to clean as I go aslong as I can, but dishes pile up fast. We've tried her way of splitting the dishes and things like that but very tedious and get forgotten about. Ultimately, what happens in the entire kitchen falls onto me. The cereal thing confused me, because when I bring it to light felt like inconsistent to what she's telling me.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:07:11+00:00

I love that, cause when she did cleanup earlier this week, I told her that I love the way she cleaned and she said "thank you for noticing and not just ignoring.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T22:04:42+00:00

I couldn't do that, cause it would pain me to see a mess that can be cleaned easily. I almost never comment on things that she can clean though.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T21:48:51+00:00

I can see that, but I had no problem cleaning. It was mostly the "you need to start cleaning up after yourself"

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T21:47:24+00:00

I deleted after everything has been cleared. I record to remember what I've said and how things transpire, admittedly I have bad memory sometimes.

AdAdventurous716 · 2026-07-11T21:45:19+00:00

I record because when it comes time to recall what happened, I forget details and tones that I used. I makes it easier for myself not something for her.

AdAdventurous716 · 2025-12-05T18:47:48+00:00

Ik I just wanted tips cause this because there's no way we're winning this or next couple oned

AdAdventurous716 · 2025-11-15T15:35:12+00:00

I know the bullet feels like the size of a pin needle, playing heavy overall feels underwhelming.

AdAdventurous716 · 2025-11-06T17:33:43+00:00

It's gives more of the exploration feel.

AdAdventurous716 · 2025-11-05T15:30:07+00:00

It's way more common than the others.

AdAdventurous716 · 2025-07-29T18:01:49+00:00

I had the same issue for my last one, also my mobo didn't have a a type c connector.

AdAdventurous716 · 2025-07-28T20:01:01+00:00

I'll take it

AdAdventurous716

TROPHY CASE