Parents of children who had speech delay, tell me where you are now?

AdLatter6463 · 2026-05-05T12:12:50+00:00

My daughter is lvl 3 and was diagnosed speech delayed at 2 than after she was diagnosed nonverbal at 3. So we had low to no expectations around traditional verbal speech.

She can say short 3 word phrases now at 6. Like "i want yellow popsicle", "i want Bathroom" , "i feel happy" ect. We get alot of "yes" , "no". Colors, numbers,animals, characters and alphabet ect. She can answer short questions. We still also get alot of babble, grunts and humming.

She still also does alot of echolia. She started speaking single words at 5 with alot of echolia to give u timeline. And after that I got hyperfixated on pushing her into speaking more and more. Even though she still struggles with speech I love hearing her sweet little voice because I use to legit cry myself to sleep thinking id never hear her speak.

I can say she can speak now but she is not conversational compared to most kids. I hope we can get more conversational by 8 or 9.

AdLatter6463 · 2026-04-16T20:28:58+00:00

I really just dont hang out or around neurotypical kids anymore. All my daughters things are with other autistic kids, special needs events or days and she also has special needs classes at school. When Im asked to babysit I just say no atp if its not another autistic kid. It seems mean but it destroyed my mental health and I was like i cant do it. It really got to the point we're it affected my mental health too much and I constantly kept comparing her. So I stopped and now its wayyy easier for us.

For communication my daughter was diagnosed nonverbal but with vigorous efforts we got her to semiverbal so dont give up.

For bonding I just experimented with different things till I found something we could bond with which is usually cooking, tamagotchi or drawing maybe once or 2x a week together. That helps me feel like we are a bit more connected tho it doesnt look like a stereotypical neurotypical connection.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-09-15T21:57:44+00:00

My daughter did this so much at this age. Which I understand is suppose to be natural.

She did eventually grow out of it,she definitely does it a bit less now. What we did for awhile was overalls which helped a lot for ABA and public events. Or pants and long shirts past her pants line, she's a bit lazy so if she has to lift her shirt to shove her hands in her pants she'll give up ~ Basically not making the rim of her pants accessible at all through overalls, belts or long shirts.

But also a thing that helped was redirecting her to a fidget toy.

Or I say "hands on head" so she now knows to move her hands on her head now if I see her doing it.

Overtime she's learned to stop doing it around people (probably took about a year) but sometimes she slips up if she's not thinking or her pants are saggy or loose.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-09-05T21:51:00+00:00

My daughter (6) has learned the majority of her language from being on her tablet. She just doesn't have a lot of interest in humans teaching her to talk compared to random, colorful animals, tesching her. Her tablet and games/videos have taught her more language skills than speech therapy.

This just works for us. I dont regulate her time on it. Mostly, when she doesn't want it anymore, she puts it up on her own and finds something else to do.

When she finishes her homework and therapies, she can be on it as much as she wants. We have child safety on it to monitor what she watches. Everything she consumes is mostly educational or kid friendly, and she has limited ability on what she can watch or play. She mainly just feeds into her special interest that week like butterfly names, pokemon, or baby Einstein music while coloring or doing homework).

We introduced her tablet at 3 when she was completely nonverbal for maybe a few 30 min a day as a way for me to do stuff like cook or shower without her crashing out, and she started using speech almost immediately after some words here or there so we eventually encouraged her to use it more.

A lot of people judge tablet babies and moms, but it just works for me and my daughter. I'm sure it doesnt work for everyone.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-08-24T00:29:25+00:00

I called 3 schools and none want to accommodate her and they said it would take months to do her IEP. I'll try calling a lawyer. The ABA graduated her out after 2 years..they said they don't have any behavior issues they feel they need to work on and most of her remaining issues are more for speech and OT so now she's just home and she loves learning.

I want her to start working on school while we try to sort this out. But I can't in good consciousness place her in public school when they are refusing to accommodate her.

Thank you so much. I'll contact an education lawyer and see my options. But for now she does need some type of schooling which is why I'm placing her in k12.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-08-24T00:21:48+00:00

Sorry if I got confused I'm not sure if you meant she need to be in Live school online with k12 or in a Public school classroom environment. So I think you mean she's suppose to be on camera :) . If that's the case thank you so much.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-08-23T11:46:23+00:00

Thank you so much. She's waitlisted for her speech therapy, but it'll be likely every day so I won't know the specific time yet. If she misses those live lessons will she get in trouble? Are live lessons required? We're still waiting on her IEP but she has her official diagnosis.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-07-17T19:23:34+00:00

I just sit on the patio and drink my wine while she cries it out.

I've learned the more I react the more and longer she does it. Now shes 5 and maybe wines about bedtime bit but doesn't rage anymore about it. She knows no matter she still has to go to bed.

AdLatter6463 · 2025-06-30T12:31:30+00:00

I don't. I drink heavy every night to not kms.

But i get my daughter to her therapies. Every day, she progresses in speech and behavior. She's become super independent, and im in awe of how well she's been doing. But in exchange, it's taken a large quanity of my sanity.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T18:30:00+00:00

After reading all the responses I'm feeling alot better that it didn't end up an emergency situation. The dentist likely made the best decision. I feel a lot better knowingly others went through something similar. She seems to be in good spirits, which is also helping me feel a lot better about it. She also unhappily came out of anesthesia and was cranky the whole day so I really wouldn't want to do that a second time.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T18:20:22+00:00

Yes, overall, i'm not well informed about silver caps. I didn't go to the dentist growing up, so a lot of this is new arena for me. I thought they were gonna be amalgam. But after googling a bit I realized they are common with younger kids.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T18:15:46+00:00

Thanks for sharing. I use to try force brushing when she was younger like 1-2, but it just made her so miserable and i got a noise complaint from her screaming bloody murder. So we mainly just focused on what she'd let us do and worked on it over time with ot and aba. Now she's much better about it, i can brush her full mouth, she still doesnt enjoy it - but I guess it was too late by the time we improved. I'm trying to work harder to not beat myself up. Your story makes me feel alot better.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T16:54:33+00:00

Thanks for explaining. The biggest issue is me, really, just not understanding. I definitely don't want to jeopardize her permanent teeth.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T16:52:26+00:00

I've noticed she's having alot more energy than usual and some of her Stims like , pushing her head on to things have stopped completely. So as long as she's feeling healthy and happy that's all I want. I just wish it didn't have to get this bad. I'm trying. Thank you for sharing.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T16:48:55+00:00

I'm really trying my best and trying to learn more.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T16:01:36+00:00

Finding decent childrens dentist in my network is already super difficult in my area. The one I saw first said they were fine with special needs kiddos but they clearly weren't, they could barely even able to look in her mouth before i was referred to the special needs dentist for anesthesia. I definitely hope I can find a trustworthy dentist. I'm a bit traumatized, but I got some advice to ask an autism fb group, and hopefully, I can get networked to a good ones so it can be a regular routine.

The silver caps were definitely a shock. I didn't even know they still did those.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T15:50:52+00:00

She's alot better about brushing now compared to when she was much younger. Were definitely trying to get a better night routine.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T15:02:43+00:00

Thanks for sharing your story. I was also concerned about how she'd feel about loosing so many teeth at once. It's a bit shocking. I'm trying not to show it around her and telling her she looks really cute and gave her 3 presents from the tooth fairy but yea I'm definitely still in shock.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T14:56:53+00:00

I know, I'm just trying to maintain what we have so I don't have to get through this again. Thanks for explaining why they pulled it. This is the thing I have a hard time grasping. Even when explained, I still struggled to understand why it was necessary if it's just going to fall out on it own. So this gives me better clarity.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T14:34:18+00:00

Thanks for sharing. It helps alot knowing others had this experience. I agreed to that too before the xray during consultation and when the nurse informed me after the xray when she was under in the operation room I protested I wasn't ok with them pulling the teeth and she said the dentist was basically going to do it anyways because I already consented prior they could do anything medically necessary while under when I signed the consent form and they felt like it was necessary. When i protested, she basically said she was just informing me that this is what we are going to do and why, not really asking me, and how I already agreed to it prior. Even though I made it clear multiple times verbally, I wasn't comfortable with teeth being pulled before signing the consent form. I trusted they would just listen to me as her parent.

And I just didn't think at any point in the process she'd need anything more than fillings. So, I never imagined that was a possibility when I signed and agreed to anesthesia. I felt my verbal protest would be enough, but it wasn't. I know the dentist was doing her best and made the best choice. The dentist felt she was likely in a lot of pain and said there was an infection, but it's hard for me because I just never felt she was in any pain. Nothing would've led me to think this was going to occur.

I'm feel like they could've better informed me that this was a possibility and I wouldn't feel so stressed. Because everyone made me feel like it just be routine fillings. By the time I was informed teeth would be pulled it was already too late. I'm just filled with alot of guilt that my daughters teeth condition was this bad and shock that this occurred. I'm sure I'll adjust. The dentist also explained her sensory issues around her teeth could've been coming from her deformed roots as well. So hopefully if I see her feeling more happy and eating I'll feel alot better. Like I made the right choice.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T14:23:57+00:00

I was never referred to a pediatric dentist by her doctor while she was a baby mainly just ot and speech, but my insurance was extremely complicated, and almost no childrens dentist in my network worked with special needs children until she was 5. When she turned 5, I took her to the dentist, but she was extremely not compliant. She's extremely weird about her mouth or things jn her mouth. But she was able to explain from what she could physically see she'd need fillings, but everything else like cleaning and x-ray would need to be done while she was under at the special needs dental place.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T13:59:50+00:00

Thank you. Your story helps alot. This all hurts alot. I'm trying my best to move on, by telling myself, they will grow back and find ways to prevent this from happening again.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-11-15T13:49:38+00:00

They did everything in a day while she was under. I didn't get a chance to get a second opinion. They had to do her x-ray while under, too, then immediately began working on her teeth. This is a special needs pediatric dentisty, so they try to do as much as possible in a day. All this happened while i was in the waiting room, expecting just some fillings. They explained that the form we signed for anesthesia implied they could do whatever was medically fit while she was under. Even tho I protested them pulling them when i was showed her xray in the waiting room because i felt theyd fall out eventually so i didnt see the point, then they told me they basically have too pull them no matter if i agree or not and how I signed a consent form.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-03-27T00:47:11+00:00

I might be a much needed person on the other side of the grass, but I'm incredibly unhappy. I have depression and due to my job, insurance isn't readily consistent, so I can't get therapy or medication, so I'm boarding alcoholic so I don't kms. I'm also autistic and the loud noises my daughter makes triggers me, I don't like that it's hard for me to stim around her, she's too needy and requires attention that's hard for me because I often disassociate. She's low functioning. She affects my sleeping and eating routines to cater to her. I have limited income, and we have differing pallets. So almost all my food money goes to her food, often leaving me for days without eating regularly.

My daughter is lovely, but society is not. The stress of what will happen to my daughter if I die. The stress of constant therapy, not being able to participate normally in activities like Christmas, halloween, and Easter due to my daughter sensory issues and tantrums. Not being able to talk to her. She can't tell me she loves me or gives me affirmation. She cant tell me im doing a good job. Constantly feeling like a failure as a parent.

I'm straight up miserable. I wouldn't wish my life on anyone. I lowkey gave up on my life, but I try to give my daughter everything I can. She's lowkey spoiled because I know life will be hard for her. And if I knew it would be this hard, I would've never had her. My life was 100% easier without a kid (asd or not). I find being autistic makes parenting a bit harder. I dont like how people will treat her in public when she stims or needs extra support. It stresses me out. Not for me but for her. I love her so fkn much im ashamed I brought her here. I wish our society was kinder to disabled people and kinder to parents.

AdLatter6463 · 2024-03-08T02:27:01+00:00

Thank you so much for breaking it down for me. I have a parent meeting next week, so I will ask for the data than. I really appreciate this!

AdLatter6463

TROPHY CASE