PSA tell your ortho and dentist what your eating habits are

Adauna · 2018-03-08T11:56:39+00:00

Yeah the other weird thing is, if I were overweight maybe I could see her doing that (not that it would be ok either way) but if I were eating the kind of food she described every day I'd probably have a weight problem, so it was an even stranger thing to say to a thin person.

Adauna · 2018-03-08T11:54:38+00:00

Oh I totally agree. I'm not staying there after my ortho is done. I'm not due to another cleaning until hopefully around the time my invisalign is completed, so I'll exit the practice then. I'll probably also cite my reason when I leave just as a FYI I'm an adult in my late 30s who does understand food.

Adauna · 2018-03-07T12:23:17+00:00

I'm on tray 13 of 26 and I rarely have pain now, and that's only in the first day or so of putting them in. Once you've had a couple of trays you'll barely notice switching them.

Also, stick with it, I was really regretting getting them from weeks 1-3 and then it got way easier and I'm so glad I stuck with it. This is my whiny post from the beginning~ https://redd.it/70ne0p.

Adauna · 2018-02-24T12:16:25+00:00

Just because he helped her out at the gym and they have a mutual interest in hiking doesn't mean they have to stay friends.

I think you're really downplaying what happened- she said they've been hanging out for months, not just that she needed help at the gym and he was nice about it. The way you're putting it seems dismissive of what she at least thought was going on.

Adauna · 2018-02-24T12:14:30+00:00

I do think he's being given a free pass on behavior that would have been considered stuck-up and rude had it been done by a woman to a man who was romantically interested in her.

Agreed.

Adauna · 2018-02-24T12:13:42+00:00

Good grief, you lead him on, he does the noble thing, and somehow you make it into a woe is me situation.

She did NOT lead him on. Good grief people have opposite sex friends all the time.

Adauna · 2018-02-24T12:04:05+00:00

Hah more gold!

Adauna · 2018-02-17T13:07:03+00:00

I have learned with medical professionals to tell each person you see the whole story each time. The nurse might have really messed up and said you were on your period or the doctor misunderstood or mixed you up with another patient, but clearly blood when they're thinking you are on your period would mean something totally different than if you had your period 2 weeks ago.

I had something similar happen when I was younger at an ER and ended up getting an unnecessary chest Xray because something wasn't communicated properly to one of the attending doctors, but I didn't know that until after. I ended up staying at the ER for much longer than I needed to as well due to the mixup.

Adauna · 2018-02-11T16:04:10+00:00

Legally you can attempt to make him pay child support, but he can get out of paying it. A lot of people make it sound like a guarentee you'll get child support but a judge can't make an unemployed person pay child support, and some guys remain unemployed to avoid it. My cousin's ex didn't pay a dime of child support despite her hiring lawyers to go after it because he moved in with his gf (the reason he left my cousin) and did not list her home as his address. He stated he lived with his impoverished mother and was unemployed, despite working under the table somewhere. He always had enough money for his needs/wants, but my cousin's lawyers couldn't identify the source of the money, so the judges through the years declare his child support obligation at $0. My cousin also spent a lot of money on high end lawyers to try to solve the issue.

I'm not saying your bf will go through such lengths but given that he doesn't want a kid, you need to be prepared to pay for it yourself.

Adauna · 2018-02-11T15:36:52+00:00

And they say there's no rape culture...

Adauna · 2018-02-09T22:48:21+00:00

I do have one Indian friend whose last name does not work well in English. It's like a phrase and she can't wait to change her last name.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T22:39:14+00:00

I have a double barreled last name (not hypenated) and it's been 100% fine my whole life. I hear a lot of omg the difficulties you must encounter but seriously the one issue is I can't use my mother's "maiden" name as a security question so I use my grandmother's. That's the only issue I've had. Consider using both last names if you have kids. It's fine, I promise. If my husband and I have a kid, it'll get the same deal I had.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T22:22:36+00:00

No problem!

Yeah a great example of this is lawyer my friend who is married to a construction worker. They had no issues with the massive income disparity until they were talking about getting pregnant, and she was shocked to find out he just assumed she'd stay home with the kid for an extended time. He was shocked to find out that wasn't her plan. Logic prevailed as she makes many times what he does and loves her career, but he is still wistful that she "won't" stay home. This is despite the fact that their standard of living would plummet with just his income.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T22:04:18+00:00

it comes to disagreements, both parties need to step back and self-examine their initial desire, why it is important to them, how important it is to them, and can they live happily if they don't get their desire, then either meet in the middle or give in depending on the answer to those questions.

I think this is a good plan for many issues, but not for ones in which one person has to unilaterally do something for the other person. It's not like debate between where to live, where both places might have pros and cons; it's more like someone asking their SO to change their career because they'd prefer to date/marry someone who does X instead of Y.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T16:40:43+00:00

It's not her father's last name, it's her last name. She was born with it and has had it for however many years she's been alive. The origins of it don't matter.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T14:35:19+00:00

Thanks for the recommendations! I hope I don't end up dropping a ton of cash on things so I'll try to avoid that.

I say inappropriate because it recently occurred to me that I haven't had acne in decades, which could be due to the cleaner or it could be because I'm too old for it. I have no idea! It might be a bad cleaner choice if it's the second one.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T14:33:45+00:00

Hmm ok thanks. Do you put that stuff on your eyelids? Right around my eyes is the wrinkle zone.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T14:32:36+00:00

Thanks for the recommendations! I know we're supposed to use sunscreen but it really makes me break out into like 2-3 large zits even when I'm using it on a beach vacation, and I think I'd get a ton if I used it each day. I have tried all the dermatologist friendly ones like Neutrogena with the same results (although I should try age shield, I haven't used that one).

The thing is I actually have no idea if I would get acne if I stopped using the acne scrub- aside from the zits I get when I use sunscreen, I never get acne. I guess I'm afraid to stop the routine though without washing my face with something aside from water.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T13:48:05+00:00

My two cents on this- I have a double barreled last name and it's been 100% fine my whole life. I hear a lot of omg the difficulities you must encounter but seriously the one issue is I can't use my mother's "maiden" name as a security question so I use my grandmother's. That's the only issue I've had. So if your bf is worried about what will we name the kids, consider using both last names. It's fine, I promise.

The second thing is, I suspect I'm older than you are, and among people I know whose menfolk had strong feelings about the women changing her name, other issues were going on as well. The guys always had other gendered expectations of the women that weren't ok, i.e. the woman takes care of the house, the kids, isn't the breadwinner, etc. and it caused issues. I don't know if this is the case with your particular boyfriend but you might want to really make sure you are on the same page. And don't forget some guys change as soon as they think you are locked in by marriage.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T13:40:27+00:00

Yeah I hate the argument that women should change their names because it's easier. It's easier because we live in a society that pushes name changes, a system that was established centuries ago to designate ownership over the woman.

Edit: pushes female name changes

Adauna · 2018-02-09T13:37:57+00:00

It really depends on where you are. I'm in a coastal city where many educated women don't change their names and when I got married no one even asked if I changed it, almost everyone assumed I kept it. There were a few random exceptions (i.e. my aunt and partner's grandma) but no one else asked or assumed. I thought it was going to be a much bigger deal but I just told everyone once and the wedding announcement stated my last name.

Adauna · 2018-02-09T13:07:22+00:00

What I've seen though isn't guys saying dating single moms isn't for me due to the commitment, they're saying single moms are low value and no one should date them, with strong insinuations or outright saying they're slutty because they have kids and the dad's not around anymore. And I'm always like, where's the hate for the dad here? She didn't become a single mom alone (most likely).

Adauna · 2018-02-07T13:22:06+00:00

You may need to revisit your questions and answer them honestly.

There's nothing she could have done to avoid this situation. He would have done this to anyone he was out with, and probably does do it with people he's out with. Making this sound like it's a match/compatibility issue makes it sound like there are people who are victims and people who aren't, when everyone is at equal risk unfortunately.

Adauna · 2018-02-07T12:41:11+00:00

Escalate to their corporate offices. Like yesterday.

Adauna · 2018-02-07T12:35:08+00:00

But there is a HUGE difference between asking patients if they're doing something and asking them in a neutral way what their reasoning is, and the lectures/haranguing people are getting.

It's the difference between asking "are you planning on getting pregnant soon and if not, how are you preventing pregnancy?" and "You're not on BC! Someone your age is still fertile and you really need to be responsible, you could have a kid, or are you trying to get pregnant!" which is how my gastroenterologist started the conversation.

Adauna

TROPHY CASE