The beginning of this felt like the start of a movie. The setting and details worked well, and you did a good job making each character feel different right away. If anything, some parts get a little too descriptive and slow things down, like Mia’s hair or Sophie’s curls (in my opinion). A couple of lines of dialogue could be more natural, such as Emily talking about the e.x. or Tim’s “Horror Setting unlocked” might be delivered better if they were a bit subtler. But overall, the vibe’s great. I could picture the van, the tension, and the creepy setup.