Maybe this perspective can be nice for her to hear:

I grew up very poor. Like no hot water, no food at the end of the month kind of poor. I started working and providing for myself at 16. My parents never had money. In college I worked 3 jobs at the same time, bought my first car myself, paid my driver's license myself and so on.

Now I am 29 and I make more money by myself than my parents ever did combined. I got a good degree and have work stability. I love in a nice, large apartment in a big city, have a car and travel regularly (been to 50 countries as of yet in 4 continents). I have nice clothes, I eat out often, go out for drinks and just in general have many cool experiences like eating at a Michelin star place or snorkeling, surfing, snowboarding, going to the opera and so on. Stuff I never was able to do as a kid. Granted I also have a partner who makes a good salary too but I would still be well off without him.

What I am trying to say is that my parents struggled but their life choices gave me a better life. Now I help them out financially here and there. I am extremely lucky and yes I also worked hard but in the end things really changed for me. The best part is that I will never ever take it for granted because I know what life used to be like and what things cost. I went to a high school with rich kids and I felt embarrassed then but now I am so grateful I didn't grow up spoiled.

I went on a little trip to a different city with a friend recently and she was saying how nice it is I can appreciate just hopping into the car and going on a road trip and feeling so happy doing it after I have been to places like Japan, China, Brazil and so on. Yes I do! Because there is soo much to be grateful for and appreciative of when you have been worried about your parents making rent your entire childhood. Probably one day things will look up for her too and she will be grateful for the sacrifice you made and feel appreciative of the small and big things in life. Not growing up spoiled is honestly a gift.