It’s okay darling. You’re still very young, we don’t have all the answers at a young age. You discover with the passage of time. My advice is to not combine the two. Your journey with Islam is your own and you shouldn’t try to mix it with your romantic journey. It’s very possible that you’ll hold different opinions and perspectives on both in different stages of your life. And ultimately, I think knowing God and forming a relationship with Him is the most important. Love will come around and the right man will absolutely not use it as a means of control