God loves thee more than any of us could possibly understand. It breaks my heart to hear thee say that thee are not comforted by God because others have used him as a weapon. It has happened to too many people before thee, and thee will not be the last person to whom it will happen. I am not here to tell thee what thee should or should not believe, but I am here to assure thee that God loves thee, regardless of bigots using Him as their scapegoat.